A Visual Guide to the David Petraeus Circus

As far as I can tell, L'Affaire Petraeus involves a woman named Jill Kelley who was allegedly cyber-harassed by Paula Broadwell, alleged mistress of CIA Director David Petraeus. The love pentagon — represented above as an homage to every terrible PowerPoint slide ever created by a Department of Defense public affairs team — also involved Kelley's alleged relationship with an FBI agent (who allegedly sent Kelley shirtless photos of himself, for some reason) and a series of "compromising" communications (which may be a few hundred innocuous emails, not the 20,000 communications initially reported) between Kelley and Gen. John Allen, the commander of U.S. forces in Afghanistan. The fact that he commands U.S. forces in Afghanistan is, indeed, the only non-alleged piece of information here.

We don't quite know the whole story yet, but after several days of revelations (alleged revelations?) a few things are clear:

* The media is really, really bored post-election.

* The FBI reads people's emails on quite small pretenses and this is worrying! Your love letter to Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf is not secure.

* We should quarantine Tampa, Florida, home of CENTCOM and all things tawdry.

* Anthony Weiner and John Edwards are probably linked to this, somehow.

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Previously: David Petraeus Resigns from C.I.A. Over Sex Scandal

Tags: Afghanistan, David Petraeus, Media, Sex

Our Endorsements: Sarah Silverman Cuts to the Chase

* Sarah Silverman's NSFW indecent proposal.

* What is this "Afghanistan" you speak of, from The Onion.

* The New Yorker political cartoon of the day for all you thinkers out there.

* Sean Lennon asks you not to frack his mother on Jimmy Fallon.

* Watch Romney get pulled over during the Seamus incident, from Funny or Die.

Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Daily Links, Environment, Funny or Die, Jimmy Fallon, Mitt Romney, Sarah Silverman, Seamus Romney, Sheldon Adelson, The New Yorker, The Onion, Theodore Roosevelt, Yoko Ono

Quote Unquote: The War on Terror

Glenn Greenwald on the fallout from the War on Terror…

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"Given the ongoing American quest for violence from that one-day attack [9/11], just imagine the impact which continuous attacks over the course of a full decade must have on those whom we’ve been invading, droning, cluster-bombing, occupying, detaining without charges, and indiscriminately shooting."

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Yeah, but… those other people are foreign. They're foreigners from foreign places. Science hasn't even proven that they have souls.

So, it's really not the same thing.

Tags: 9/11, Afghanistan, Glenn Greenwald, Iraq, Military, Quote Unquote, Terrorism

Tweet Untweet: #FF @Afghanistan

CHICAGO: Obama Says US Not Deserting Afghanistan: 'We Will Continue to Follow You on Twitter' #nato

— Andy Borowitz (@BorowitzReport) May 21, 2012

Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Tweet Untweet, Twitter

Tweet Untweet: Special Photo Ops

Sarah Palin condemned Obama's Afghanistan trip as a "tacky photo op," then got back on her bus with her name and the Constitution on it.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) May 3, 2012

Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Constitution, Sarah Palin, Tweet Untweet, Twitter