Hannity and Colmes: Now With Even Less Colmes

I know it's hard to imagine Fox News' finest daily hour, Hannity and Colmes, without imagining Alan Colmes' loud pounding voice laying down strong liberal values and upbraiding the mild-mannered Sean Hannity for mouthing all his conservative talking points, but I guess we're just gonna have to get used to it.

Colmes is leaving the show at the end of the year…

"I approached Bill Shine (FNC's Senior Vice President of Programming) earlier this year about wanting to move on after 12 years to develop new and challenging ways to contribute to the growth of the network," Colmes said in a statement. "Although it's bittersweet to leave one of the longest marriages on cable news, I'm proud that both Sean (Hannity) and I remained unharmed after sitting side by side, night after night for so many years."

Sean Hannity said Colmes was "a remarkable co-host," "great friend," and "skillful debate partner."

No word yet on who — if anyone — will be taking Alan Colmes' place beside Sean Hannity.

I'd like to take this opportunity to let the executives at Fox News that I've got an old coat hanger I'm selling real cheap. Email me!

Tags: Alan Colmes, Fox, Sean Hannity

Sean Hannity's Pain is My Ice Cream Sundae

Because watching Fox News people make asshats of themselves never fails to bring joy into my life…

We all know how much Sean Hannity abhors authors speaking out politically for or against a specific candidate.

It's nice to see Robert Kuttner make such a big showing for bald, nerdy guys everywhere.

Tags: Alan Colmes, Fox, Sean Hannity

Alan Colmes Booms His Dynamite All Over Sean Hannity

From Salon's Scott Bateman, here's an animated version of an on-air debate/throwdown between Sean Hannity and Alan Colmes concerning John Edwards and John McCain's wayward penises from earlier this week.

And holy shit does Alan Colmes deliver the smackdown!

Here's my personal favorite part, from the very end…

Hannity: Let's see how you act after getting beaten after five and a half years!

I think we just did.

Tags: Alan Colmes, Cindy McCain, Fox, John Edwards, John McCain, Rielle Hunter, Sean Hannity

Shark Week Sharktacular!: Leopard Shark & Remora or Hannity & Colmes?

Can you tell the difference between a Leopard Shark and its parasite the Remora and Fox News' Sean Hannity and his parasite Alan Colmes?

a) Began their professional relationship in October of 1996.

b) Their relationship is one of commensalism, in which one benefits and the other is not significantly harmed or helped.

c) The smaller attaches itself to its host through use of a modified oval sucker-like organ with slat-like structures that open and close to create suction and take a firm hold of larger's skin, and then proceeds to feed from food dropped from the larger's mouth.

d) While the larger is a strong conservative, the smaller — though often considered to be liberal — is really more of a moderate. And a total pussy.

e) The smaller creature is sometimes used by fishermen as a means to catch sea turtles.

f) Due to its small size, the larger of the two is not considered to be a genuine threat to humans.

g) If the smaller is unavailable for whatever reason, it is sometimes replaced by Harold Ford Jr.

h) Bottom feeders.

Answers after the jump.

a – H&C; b – Both; c – LS&R; d – H&C; e – LS&R; f – LS&R; g – H&C; h – Both

Read
Bull Shark or Maureen Dowd?
Gray Reef Shark or Anderson Cooper?

Tags: Alan Colmes, Fox, Sean Hannity, Shark Week Sharktacular!