Roses are red, violets are blue, but if you're a nerd who knows they're actually violet, Valentine's Day is not the holiday for you.
Good thing there are so many other occasions to celebrate if you're not falling for the romance-industrial complex:
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On this day in 1899, Congress approved the use of voting machines for use in federal elections. Mark the occasion by standing for three hours in the line of your choice.
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On this day in 1912, Arizona became the 48th state. Celebrate by asking Arizona to show its statehood certificate.
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The United States Department of Commerce and Labor was established on this day in 1903. Celebrate by learning the name of the (Acting) Secretary of Commerce. Hint: it's not Gary Locke any more!
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Today is Mayor Michael Bloomberg's 71st birthday. You're allowed to eat 71 hot dogs in celebration, but you'll have to wash them down with an eight-ounce soda.
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James K. Polk became the first president to have his photograph taken on this day in 1849. Commemorate the moment with an Instagram of all those hot dogs you ate for Bloomberg's birthday.
A Special Valentine for Hillary Fans
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Tags: Arizona, Department of Commerce, History, Michael Bloomberg, Valentine's Day
Not satisfied with being number one in the United States in high school education (correction: number one in high school dropouts), Arizona lawmakers have come up with two hot new proposals to make it harder for students to get their diplomas.
One proposed bill requires students to say the Pledge of Allegiance — current law tells schools to make time for the pledge recitation for "for those students who wish" — unless they're excused "at the request of a parent" who can explain why their son or daughter hates America.
Tags: Arizona, Education, Immigration, State Legislature
According to the AP, Barack Obama has been re-elected President of the United States after members of the Electoral College cast the official, final votes in the 2012 presidential election.
There wasn't much suspense. Neither Gallup nor Dean Chambers nor even Dick Morris could find a way to predict a Mitt Romney landslide amid the 538 electors who actually cast ballots selecting the president. But there was still one open question: could Arizona's Electoral College delegates supplant Arizona State University as that state's most embarrassing college?
As Arizona's electors cast 11 electoral votes for Republican challenger Mitt Romney, two Republicans — state GOP Chairman Tom Morrissey and elector Don Ascoli — said they still doubt the legitimacy of the birth certificate that Obama released in 2011.
"I'm not satisfied with what I've seen," Morrissey said. "I think for somebody in the president's position to not have produced a document that looks more legitimate, I have a problem with that."
In Arizona's defense: yes, this is racism, but it's dry racism.
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Tags: Arizona, Birthers, Electoral College
According to her spokesman, Arizona governor Jan Brewer was unavailable to participate in the official certification of the state's vote count because she was out of the state on "official business." What business is that?
"That is all I can disclose at this time," [spokesman Matthew] Benson added.
He later reiterated that during a brief phone interview during which he said he could not respond to several questions about Brewer's whereabouts.
Your guess is as good as mine, but there are a few possibilities.
Tags: Arizona, Jan Brewer
Having never missed an election, I thought my civic duty bonafides were secure, but Holly Solomon of Gilbert, Arizona is a much, much more committed small-d democrat.
She is under arrest on charges of domestic violence after having chased her 36-year-old husband in their Jeep SUV, pinning him between the SUV and a curb after the husband admitted that he did not cast a vote in the election. According to local news reports, "she believed her family would suffer under a second term of Pres. Barack Obama."
And it was so! It's like she knew the government would look down on aggravated assault. In all seriousness, this is why it's important for people to learn about the Electoral College. Mitt Romney won over 54% of the vote in Arizona, even without this man's vote. Hopefully, Solomon takes this opportunity to employ the newly-formed GOP "I was just testing the system" legal defense and escapes severe sentencing.
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Tags: Arizona, Crime