From the Pork Barrel: 2016 Problems but a Mitt Ain't One

* According to the latest estimates, seven Republicans are not running for president in 2016. (And three of them are Mitt Romney.)

* If you're hoping that Sarah Palin will jump into the race, you're not alone.

* Joe Scarborough is about as good at making apologies as he is at understanding math.

* According to Pat Robertson, the atheists are coming to steal Christmas. Bummer. I hope they let us keep Thanksgiving, though. I already have my turkey brining.

* Hey, so, what's it take to get a spot on the House Science Committee? I mean, besides a complete lack of understanding of science?

* Even more proof that beer is the solution to all of life's problems.

* Download our free iPhone and iPad app Indecision Election Companion and join the the Peanut Gallery — our liveblog/instant reaction arena — to watch and respond as documentarian Ken Burns joins MSNBC's Meet the Press this Sunday at 10:30 am.

Photo by Royce Bair/Flickr/Getty Images

Tags: 2016, Atheists, Christmas, Climate Change, House of Representatives, Joe Scarborough, Sarah Palin, Science & Technology, War on Christmas

Tweet Untweet: Budgeting Faith

Republicans who can balance a budget are a lot like God. People believe in them, but no one can prove they exist.

— Nick Stadler (@Nickadoo) November 5, 2012

Tags: Atheists, Budget, Republicans, Tweet Untweet, Twitter

U.S. Quickly Becoming Godless Amoral Wasteland

"In God We Trust" has been the official motto of the United States since time immemorial (time immemorial having begun back in 1956, when the U.S. felt the need to distinguish itself as morally superior to the godless atheist Soviet Union).

That motto, however, is becoming increasingly false…

The number of Americans who do not identify with any religion continues to grow at a rapid pace. One-fifth of the U.S. public — and a third of adults under 30 — are religiously unaffiliated today, the highest percentages ever in Pew Research Center polling.

In the last five years alone, the unaffiliated have increased from just over 15% to just under 20% of all U.S. adults. Their ranks now include more than 13 million self-described atheists and agnostics (nearly 6% of the U.S. public), as well as nearly 33 million people who say they have no particular religious affiliation (14%).

I think we can reasonably draw two assumptions from this news: The liberal scourge of Barack Obama is indeed turning this country into a multicultural secular den of iniquity.

And heathens apparently don't read Newsweek.

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Note: I chose to include a picture of two scientists at the top of this article because it was the most godless and evil image "straight from the pit of hell" that I could imagine at the time of press.

Photo by Michael Blann/Lifesize/Getty Images

Tags: Atheists, Religion, Science & Technology

Atheist Group Launches Billboard Campaign at Democratic Convention

American Atheists — a mildly prominent organization of nonbelievers whose purpose appears to be mocking organized religion by inadvertently adopting the same tactics that makes organized religion so readily mockable — unveiled a new billboard campaign, aimed at exposing "the foolishness of religion in the political landscape."

The billboards, targeting the faiths of President Barack Obama and Mitt Romney, were originally slated to appear in Tampa during the Republican National Convention, but no billboard company in the city would lease the group space, perhaps worried about vandalism from Christians who read Matthew 5:39 as saying, "If someone strikes you on the right cheek, burn him and his billboard also."

Instead, the advertisements will appear exclusively in Charlotte, North Carolina, ahead of and during the Democratic National Convention, in what is probably a physics experiment to determine whether a smugness singularity can be achieved by combining the middle school version of atheism (I know of what I write) with a large gathering of liberals…

"Our political system is rife with religion and it depends too much on religion and not enough on substance," said David Silverman, president of American Atheists, sponsor of the ads.

"Religion is silly and religion has components that are inherently divisive… There is no place for any of that in the political system," he said.

On the bright side, at least there's one group with the courage to attack President Obama for his Protestantism.

But really, a billboard campaign that tries to actively convert people without offering any argument, except a crude critique of Christian and Mormon beliefs that aren't central to theism? Can't see how this fails. Checkmate, Christians.

Tags: Atheists, Christianity, Democratic National Convention, Mormon, Religion

From the Pork Barrel: Why So Ridiculous?

* Big question on the Internet today: Why is Rick Perry wearing Heath Ledger's coat from Brokeback Mountain in his big new anti-gay ad? Better question: Has he been using Heath Ledger's character from The Dark Knight in everything always?

* 47 to 1 Dislike to Like ratio for Perry's ad on YouTube. Surprisingly popular!

* Bill O'Reilly, it turns out, does not like being Bill O'Reilly-ed.

* Michele Bachmann's still on the fence about whether or not she has any shame.

* Donald Trump, meanwhile, suffers from no such qualms.

* Belgium just swore in its new French-speaking, openly-gay, atheist Socialist prime minister. Sigh… Every liberal's dream.

Tags: Atheists, Belgium, Bill O'Reilly, Donald Trump, LGBT, Michele Bachmann, Movies, Pork Barrel, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry