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Bill Clinton Called in to Save the Day
Do you guys remember Barack Obama's speech during the Democratic National Convention last month? No? Me neither. But I'm relatively certain he gave one, because it's, like, tradition or something, isn't it?
But, hey, what about Bill Clinton's DNC speech?! That was awesome. In fact, I made it my ring tone. Now, every time somebody calls me, I listen to Clinton's inspirational earth-shaking address to progressive America. In its entirety. I haven't spoken to any of my friends in weeks. But I can quote that speech front to back and back to front again.
I have a feeling that some people in Obama HQ feel kinda the same, which probably explains this new video…
How much you wanna bet that there are Democratic physicists working tirelessly in Chicago right now to figure out a way to quantum leap Clinton into Obama's body before the next presidential debate?
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Mitt Romney -
Our Endorsements: Bad Lip Reading Party Time, Chumps!
* Bad Lip Reading makes last week's debate watchable.
* Happy Bill Clinton is very happy.
* Air Quotes talks hilarious politics.
* Romney's tax plan is finally revealed.
* Now he just needs to figure out how it works.
* Jimmy Fallon goes to Mr. Romney's neighborhood.
* A legitimate defense of Todd Aiken, from McSweeney's.
* Joe Biden dos and don'ts for tomorrow, from Funny or Die.
* Joe Biden's pre-debate Google search history has been leaked.
* Cartoons are a good way to capture the VP debate anticipation.
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Debates, Funny or Die, Joe Biden, Mitt Romney, The Onion, Todd Aiken -
Bill Clinton Can Only Be President of Your Heart
There have to be less onerous ways to atone for one's sins than appearing on CNN's Piers Morgan — Jews manage to get away with just a daylong fast — but there Bill Clinton was, speaking to Morgan at the Clinton Global Initiative and considering a return to presidential politics…There are only two countries I'm eligible to run for the leadership position is if I move to Ireland and buy a house, I can — I can run for president of Ireland, because of my Irish heritage.
And because I was born in Arkansas, which is part of the Louisiana Purchase, any person anywhere in the world that was born in a place that ever was part of the French empire, if you move to — if you live in France for six months and speak French, you can run for president.
As with many things that come out of Clinton's mouth, this has the distinction of being both utterly charming and complete bullshit.
Irish law requires that at least one parent or grandparent be an Irish citizen at the time of your birth to generate a claim of citizenship through "heritage." As for the electoral chances of President of the French Republic Le Bubba, residents of former French territories are no longer eligible to apply for citizenship without going through the regular naturalization process.
For better or worse, the closest Clinton will come to a presidency is Barack Obama's ongoing campaign to convince voters he's running Clinton's third term.
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Related: Romney's Tax Issues Linked to Bill Clinton's Underwear, Obviously
Photo by Johannes Simon/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Bill Clinton, CNN, France, Ireland, Piers Morgan -
The Best and Worst "Gangnam Style" Political Parodies
By now, you've probably seen "Gangnam Style." It's so popular, your grandma is probably dancing to it right now even though her doctors told her she needs to give up dancing.
How do I know it's reached maximum overexposure? Because people from both sides of the YouTube aisle have made Gangnam parodies attacking and supporting Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. Wherever you lie on the political spectrum, you have to admit that this next video doesn't become truly amazing until Joe Biden shows up…
That video forgot to mention the one thing Obama and Psy actually have in common: They both weren't born in America.
This next one features Bill Clinton strutting with the Gangnam ladies. If you don't love it, you should leave America…
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Jay Leno, Joe Biden, Michelle, Mitt Romney -
Tweet Roundup: On Second Thought, Don't Do the Arithmetic
They say it ain't over until the Foo Fighters sing, so that means it's over. No more RNC, no more DNC and no more pundit's dirty looks. Thankfully, we still have plenty of Twitter commentary…
4 years in office and Obama's done nothing to improve my stamina in bed.
— Matt Koff (@mattkoff) September 7, 2012
Sad that at a moment when Obama really SHOULD be posing as the president of Greece, he didn't break out the Greek columns.
— John Hayward (@Doc_0) September 7, 2012
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Democratic National Convention, Joe Biden, Mitt Romney, Paul Ryan, Twitter
