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Brazil
  • Rio Summit Cloud of Doom Features Lining of Despair

    In 1992, world leaders gathered in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil for the United Nations Conference on Environment and Development, also known as the Earth Summit, in an air of enthusiasm, optimistic about ameliorating environmental degradation and creating a fairer, cleaner planet. Beginning tomorrow, more than 115 presidents, prime ministers and other officials are scheduled to attend Rio+20, a discussion of how badly we screwed things up.

    Barack Obama has no plans to attend the conference and Hillary Rodham Clinton will lead the American delegation, along with EPA Administrator Lisa P. Jackson and Todd Stern, a special envoy for climate change. Though little progress is expected, due in part to the intransigence of developed nations like the U.S., some environmental activists tried to look on the bright, increasingly uncomfortably warm side

    "We are facing two likely scenarios — an agreement so weak it is meaningless, or complete collapse. Neither of these options would give the world what it needs. Country positions are still too entrenched and too far apart to provide a meaningful draft agreement for approval by an expected 120 heads of state", said WWF director general Jim Leape.

    Well, good. Thanks for the pep talk. Is there any good news out there?

    The struggle for the world's remaining natural resources is becoming more murderous, according to a new report that reveals that environmental activists were killed at the rate of one a week in 2011.

    The death toll of campaigners, community leaders and journalists involved in the protection of forests, rivers and land has risen dramatically in the past three years, said Global Witness.

    Finally, someone comes up with a solution to that satisfied both Western multinationals and developing states! Just solve the overpopulation problem by murdering all those clean air-breathing, freshwater-drinking, quinoa-eating environmental activists.

    Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Brazil, Environment, Hillary Clinton, United Nations
  • The President's Old Professor Says "Obama Must Be Defeated"

    You can't always count on an old professor of yours to come through with a decent job recommendation. Even so, it's relatively uncommon for one to go on YouTube of his own accord to tell the world how much he thinks you need to be fired

    President Barack Obama's former Harvard professor took to YouTube in late May where he condemned President Obama's actions during his first term in office. "President Obama must be defeated in the coming election," said the President’s former professor and 2008 campaign advisor. "He has failed to advance the progressive cause in the United States."…

    Unger posted a video to YouTube, entitled "Beyond Obama" where he urges people to vote against the President. In that video, Unger attacks the Democratic party, the President, the tax code and the United States economy.

    Wow! It doesn't get any more scathing that that! And he's an esteemed professor from Harvard University, so he must really know what he's talking about. Plus, he's Brazilian, so he has a useful global perspective. We really need to listen to what this guy has to say…

    That is not to say that Unger is supporting Republicans — he says that, If the GOP "had its way, inequality would become even greater than it is now and threaten freedom and prosperity even more than it now does."

    However, he believes that a reorientation of the Democratic party can only be achieved through the defeat of Obama.

    Ugh. Sounds like a typical academic elitist. And, from what I understand, he's not even an American. Why are we listening to what this guy has to say again?

    Photo by Fabio Pozzebom-ABr/Wikimedia Commons


    Tags: Barack Obama, Brazil, Education
  • State Dept Discusses Hooker Scandal on "Take Your Child to Work Day"

    When your parent is a Beltway bureaucrat, participating in Take Your Child to Work Day can be kind of a drag. Well, except when your mom or dad works at the State Department.

    This year, children there learned less about work and more about working girls

    Children participating in the State Department’s "Take Your Child to Work Day" Thursday were treated to a salacious question-and-answer period on the sex scandals now rocking the Secret Service.

    Indeed, reporters paid no heed to the fact that young kids were present in the day’s media briefing, asking awkward questions about prostitutes and strippers involved in developing Secret Service scandals in Colombia and Brazil.

    Prostitution was mentioned four times in the briefing, "sex" seven times and "strippers" once. "Club," as in strip club, was mention three times.

    Best Take Your Child to Work Day ever! Or, at least since the Clinton impeachment trial.

    In any case, it must have been interesting for those kids to hear call girls mentioned in the same breath as DC politicians. One group is made up of shameless prostitutes who will do practically anything for money, and the other are Colombian escorts.

    Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Brazil, Children, Colombia, Prostitution, Secret Service, Sex, State Department
  • World Cup Fever: Rappity Rap Rapping "The Soccer (a.k.a. Football) Shuffle"

    And, thus, tomorrow begins the World Cup quarterfinals, otherwise known as South America vs. The World…

    Brazil v. Netherlands
    Uruguay v. Ghana

    Argentina v. Germany
    Paraguay v. Spain

    These games begin tomorrow, and by the end of the day Saturday, the World Cup will effectively be The South-Western Hemisphere Cup, and then the entire Eastern Hemisphere can rejoin us in having better things to think about.

    Or, maybe I spoke too soon. It appears as though there actually are some people here in the North-Western Hemisphere who are still paying attention to this. Last night, The Daily Show — in the absence of any real news — dedicated its entire episode to this Cup of the World thing. Here's Jon Hodgman explains how FIFA can make Non-American Football more appealing to Non-Non-Americans…



    The CC Insider has the complete episode in its complete completesity right over GOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL!!!!!!

    The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.


    Tags: Argentina, Brazil, Germany, Ghana, John Hodgman, Jon Stewart, Netherlands, Paraguay, Soccer, Spain, Sports, The Daily Show, Uruguay
  • Are You Aware That "Soccer," "Socialism," "Satan" and "Sodomy" All Start with the Same Letter?

    It's true! Racist basement guy here is not lying. I checked it out with the dictionary and everything! There are no coincidences, obviously (don't be naive!), so something insidious is afoot.

    And those Mexicans from Brazil (the worst kinds of Mexicans) are probably behind it.


    Tags: Brazil, Mexico, Racism, Satan, Soccer, Socialism, Sports