Fox & Friends Scared That Maybe Not Enough People Will Come to See Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert and Then They'll Get Sad
This is very, very sweet. Somebody needs to send these guys a rum cake or something.
Obviously, I'm referring to how oh-so-very concerned Steve Doocy, Brian Kilmeade and Gretchen Carlson of Fox & Friends are for the well being of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. Because what if their highly-anticipated upcoming dueling rallies aren't able to outdraw Glenn Beck's Restoring Honor Rally from last month? Oh no!
After playing a clip of Stewart on O’Reilly last night, host Steve Doocy said, "Ok and Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are going to have a big rally in our nation’s capitol, at the end of October and when asked last night on the O’Reilly’s show whether or not they have a permit or something like that, Jon Stewart said probably not."
Brian Kilmeade then delivered the Foxaganda, "I believe they do, and they are heavily on the line on this, but can you possibly outdraw Glenn Beck? They are putting themselves totally out there."
Gretchen Carlson chimed in with, "That’s what we were discussing yesterday. I don't know if it's a such a smart P.R. move, but you never know how many people will show up. Lots of people watch their shows."
Let's hope so, Gretchen! For everyone concerned, am I right? Hahahahahahaha!
But seriously, if the Stewart/Colbert rallies do prove to be two giant busts, we are are certain that nobody will be feeling the pain more than you three kindhearted so-and-so's. But we will be there for you. We'll all get through this together. Like the true blue Fox & Friends and friends that we are.
Tags: 8/28 Rally, Brian Kilmeade, Fox, Glenn Beck, Gretchen Carlson, Jon Stewart, March to Keep Fear Alive, Rally to Restore Sanity, Stephen Colbert, Steve Doocy
Uh oh! Looks like John Cusack — Satanic death cult high priest and star of Hot Tub Time Machine — is dropping The Devil's Fatwah on Fox News. Just look at this not-at-all-an-obviously-kind-of-lame-joke Satanic tweet the very scary man just evil twittered a few days ago…
Oh no! Do what you will with Steve Doocy, just please don't hurt Brian Kilmeade! (Seriously. Do whatever you want with Steve Doocy. Come on, be creative.)
Anyway, Fox News, for their part, is handling this very real and serious and scary threat with the appropriate amount of measured adultitude…
John Cusack Calls for 'Satanic Death' of Fox News, GOP Leaders
Actor John Cusack went on a caustic Twitter rampage Sunday evening, attacking former House Majority Leader Dick Armey, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich and Fox News…
Cusack has long been outspoken about politics. He supported Barack Obama in the 2008 presidential election and has contributed to The Huffington Post, but this is the first known time he has stooped to the level of making threats.
And while the U.S. Constitution protects Cusack's right to speak his mind…
Be forewarned. The following text contains dangerous levels of irony toxicity. Pregnant women may want to walk away from the computer screen…
…some critics say he should be more careful about what he says, since he has more than 200,000 Twitter followers.
"His provocative tweets could easily incite a rabid fan to commit violent acts against Fox News Headquarters and others he names," said Dr. Carole Lieberman, a Beverly Hills-based psychiatrist and author of "Coping With Terrorism: Dreams Interrupted."
Tags: 9/11, Brian Kilmeade, Fox, Islam, New York City, Religion, Republicans, Satan, Steve Doocy, Terrorism, Twitter, World Trade Center
On last night's Daily Show, Jon Stewart reported on a baffling Fox and Friends segment during which Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade discussed Alwaleed bin Talal, one of the financial backers of the so-called Ground Zero Mosque. Except they didn't mention bin Talal by name and didn't mention that he owns the second biggest stake in Fox News. It's just like that time I pretended not to know my dad when he came to pick me up from the mall wearing cutoffs and possible ties to terrorism.
Coverage of the Ground Zero Mosque continues below with a segment from last night's Colbert Report.
Tags: Alwaleed bin Talal, Brian Kilmeade, Dana Perino, Feisal Abdul Rauf, Fox, Gretchen Carlson, Islam, John Oliver, Jon Stewart, Rupert Murdoch, Steve Doocy, Terrorism, The Daily Show, Video, Wyatt Cenac
Unfortunately, this case untreatable. It's brought on by some sort of inoperable blockage of ethics and rationality in the objective lobe. So long as Fox News is fed a steady stream of stupid from the heart of America — which, let's face it, will not be cut off anytime soon — it will continue to present symptoms of chronic assholeishness.
But the good news is that in its present condition it can live a long and extremely profitable life as a make believe news organization providing make believe news to people who just don't give a shit. Note the particularly ratings-bloated tumor named Bill O'Reilly that Rachel Maddow confronts her in this clip from last night…
The patient's history on this matter can be observed after the jump. Make sure to scrub up first. The patient's immune-to-criticism system is badly compromised.
Tags: Andrew Breitbart, Barack Obama, Bill O'Reilly, Brian Kilmeade, Fox, MSNBC, NAACP, Rachel Maddow, Racism, Robert Gibbs, Shirley Sherrod, Steve Doocy, Tom Vilsack, White House
You'll be happy to know that the right-wing pundosphere totally has Joe Barton's back.
Thank God! I was really worried about that guy's feelings.
Tags: BP, Brian Kilmeade, Energy & Oil, Environment, Fox, House of Representatives, Joe Barton, Laura Ingraham, Mark Levin, Money, Newt Gingrich, Pat Buchanan, Steve Doocy, Tony Hayward