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Children
  • Senate Republicans Oppose the Right to Rock

    At first glance, Senate Republican opposition to ratification of the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities — a U.N. treaty signed by George W. Bush in 2006 and reaffirmed by Barack Obama in 2009 but not yet approved two-thirds of the Senate — seems self-explanatory.

    There's their abiding hatred of the U.N. and concern for the "sovereignty" of the U.S. And there's the fact that they've already pissed off every minority demographic group in America. Having lost the 2012 election by an 87% margin among African Americans, 47% among Asians, 44% among Hispanics and 54% among gays and lesbians, Republicans have naturally set their sights on pissing off disabled Americans for much the same reason obsessive nerds buy Superman IV: Quest For Peace: it's about completeness.

    But at a press conference, Senator Mike Lee of Utah, former senator Rick Santorum and Michael Farris of the Home School Legal Defense Association (HSLDA) laid out more reasons for their opposition to the CRPD.

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    Tags: Children, Mike Lee, Rick Santorum, Senate, United Nations
  • Romney Grandkids Reveal Foreign Policy Agenda

    Backstage at Lynn University' s Performing Arts Center, the Romney family gathered for its traditional game of pre-debate Jenga. Except, look at the game being played Romney's grandchildren, who are set to be Commanders in Chief of our nation's heart. That looks more like a game of dominoes than Jenga. As in domino theory. As in another land war in Asia!

    I'm not saying it's a foolproof method of demystifying Mitt Romney's opaque foreign policy plans, but it's as close as anyone else has come.

    Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Children, Debates, Foreign Policy, Mitt Romney
  • Barack Obama Wins Babysitting Wars

    According to newly-released ABC News/Washington post poll, 49% of registered voters said they would entrust their child to the president's care, compared to 36% who preferred Romney as their babysitter. The same survey asked Americans which candidate is more apt to go bungee jumping (Obama by 39%) and who would be better at a captaining a ship through a storm (Obama by 4%), two activities best avoided while babysitting.

    Are these good survey questions that successfully measure impressions about the candidates' compassion and competence? No. But they make for a great sitcom.

    INT. ROMNEY COMPOUND IN LA JOLLA, CA — EVENING.
    MITT ROMNEY exits car elevator, enters living room, tossing $100,000 Woodrow Wilson bill in to the money-burning fireplace that illuminates the room. At request of Humane Society, no dogs are shown. Discovers SMALL CHILD sitting on couch.

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    Tags: Barack Obama, Children, Mitt Romney, Polls
  • Wimpy Arkansas GOP Backs Away from Slavery and Child Murder

    It appears that Mitt Romney's move toward the political center is having a wider impact than originally anticipated. No sooner had the candidate at the top of the GOP ticket backed away from his contention that 47% of Americans are barely worthy of serving as dressage horse stable hands, this bleeding heart syndrome has begun to infect even the most rock-ribbed of conservative state parties.

    The latest to be struck down by viral liberalism is the Arkansas Republican Party. Ever since a takeover the State House appeared in sight, the state GOP has offered support to the likes of  State Rep. Jon Hubbard, author of Letters to the Editor: Confessions of a Frustrated Conservative and opinions such as, "the institution of slavery that the black race has long believed to be an abomination upon its people may actually have been a blessing in disguise."

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    Tags: Arkansas, Capital Punishment, Children, Racism, Republicans, Slavery, State Legislature
  • Big Bird Claws Back at Mitt Romney

    Mitt Romney may love Big Bird, but the feeling is not mutual. Ever since Mitt Romney promised to "stop the subsidy to PBS" during the first presidential debate, the Internet has been atwitter with the protests of loyal Sesame Street viewers.

    The kerfuffle is another reminder that primary elections matter. Sesame Street is produced by the Children's Television Workshop. If Newt Gingrich were still around, there'd be no debate about the worthiness of the enterprise, except to wonder why it doesn't employ even more children.

    As it is, Romney has an Occupy Sesame Street movement on his hands…

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    Tags: Children, Debates, Mitt Romney, Television