Scott Walker Wins Wisconsin Recall Election

You know how sometimes you receive a notice from a manufacturer indicating that the fuel injector on your model 2001 Chevy Crapmobile could develop small cracks, which could lead to fuel leakage and in the presence of an ignition source may lead to fire, so please take it to the nearest dealer for servicing? And you're like, screw this recall, it's an hour's drive and there's a 16 and Pregnant marathon on TV, I'll just take my chances dying in a fiery wreck?

Basically, that's what happened last night in Wisconsin. Except instead of a notice from the car company describing the problem, the recall was preceded by millions of dollars in advertising explaining how the fuel leak was a feature that made the car go faster — in fact, it was a job-creating fuel leak — and the replacement part was even more defective, because it was soft on crime and would raise your taxes.

So it's no wonder that with 99% of precincts reporting, Republican incumbent Scott Walker took 53.2% of the vote  to Democratic challenger's Tom Barrett 46.3%. The exit polls revealed some glimmers of hope for Democrats. The same electorate that chose not to recall Walker also said, by 51% to 44%, that they favored Barack Obama for president over Mitt Romney. Obama received the support of 17% of Walker voters, while only 6% of Barrett voters favored Romney. And a narrow majority of voters, 51%, said they had a favorable opinion of public-employee unions, while 45% said they had an unfavorable opinion.

Such results were an indication that Walker and his Republican allies were able to make a procedural case against the recall, with 70% of voters saying that recalls should never be used or be reserved for cases of official misconduct. Sure, the thinking goes, this defective fuel injector is somewhat disconcerting, but don't I have a regularly scheduled maintenance appointment every four years? If the vehicle to go through a recall every time something goes awry, it would never take any trips except to the dealer.

Still, Democrats were a little too quick to spin a 7% defeat into a moral victory. DNC Chairwoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz's statement was typical, "Despite the disappointing outcome of tonight's election, there is no question that over the past year this recall effort sent a message to Scott Walker that his brand of divisive politics is offensive and wrong." It makes you wish Napoleon had a Democratic spokesman at his side: "Despite the disappointing outcome of today's battle, there is no question that over the past year this war effort sent a message to Wellington." We need a clearer system for sending messages.

Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Tags: Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Recall, Scott Walker, Tom Barrett, Wisconsin

Quote Quiz: Democratic Operative or Republican Candidate?

We're rapidly approaching peak Meh-cceptance and moving toward the point of the primary  season during which  bitter Republican rivals proclaim their party's nominee to be the greatest specimen of human accomplishment since Ronald Reagan. But before they anoint Mitt Romney as successor to Saint Ronny, let us pause to recall the awful things they said about him and try to distinguish them from the awful things Democrats have said about Romney.

Our scoring system today honors Newt Gingrich — identify all 6 quotes correctly and you're a "Leader…of the civilizing forces;" 3-5 correct, you're an "Advocate of civilization;" 0-2 correct, you must suffer from a "Kenyan, anti-colonial" worldview.

For each quote, identify whether the speaker is a Democratic operative or a would-be Republican nominee:

1. "[Mitt Romney] is someone who doesn't have a core. He has been on both sides of almost every single issue in the past ten years."

2. "I think there is a sense there is no core to [Romney]"

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Tags: David Axelrod, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Democrats, Games and Challenges, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Republicans, Rick Santorum

From the Pork Barrel: Fired in the Hole

* Prepare yourself. A blizzard of "They both like firing people" jokes is coming.

* Sandra Day O'Connor on the GOP frontrunners: "One is a practicing polygamist, and he's not even the Mormon." Unfortunately, she's already retired, so the Andrew Breitbarts of the world won't get to bleat for her impeachment.

* Rush Limbaugh has a great idea: Get rid of the minimum wage and replace it with who gives a fuck about those people.

* Barack Obama thinks Jesus would raise taxes on the rich. Maybe back in the Bible days. But he was in his early thirties then. A deity gets considerably more conservative over the course of a couple millennia.

Tags: Christianity, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, DNC, Donald Trump, Marriage, Mitt Romney, Mormon, Newt Gingrich, Pork Barrel, Primaries, Religion, Republicans, Sandra Day O'Connor, Supreme Court

Stephen Colbert on Allen West's Pithy Takedown of Debbie Wasserman Shultz

"Let me make myself perfectly clear, you want a personal fight, I am happy to oblige. You are the most vile, unprofessional ,and despicable member of the US House of Representatives." – Allen West

Do mine ears deceive me or doth I recognize a paraphrasing of the Bard there?

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

Tags: Allen West, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, House of Representatives, Iraq, Military, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Video

From the Pork Barrel: The DNC Gets DWS

* Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz to replace Tim Kaine as DNC chair/fall guy for impending 2012 election disaster.

* Arianna Huffington certainly seems to have something against writers getting paid. Were her parents maybe killed by a writer with a saving's account?

* Peter King receives bloody pig foot in the mail from anonymous sender. Does somebody have a secret admirer?

* Scott Walker proves he knows how to create jobs. Really well-paying ones.

* The Onion: GOP Completely Fixes Economy by Canceling Funding for NPR

Tags: AOL, Arianna Huffington, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, DNC, Florida, House of Representatives, Huffington Post, Money, New York, NPR, Peter King, Pork Barrel, Republicans, Scott Walker, The Onion, Wisconsin