- Michigan oils up for state primary super orgy.
- Rush Limbaugh uses amazing power of awesome humorousness to compare one black person to another black person.
- Number of missing White House emails now out-numbers residents of South Carolina.
- Elizabeth Edwards won't go changing to try and please you — she never let you down before. Mmmmmm hmmmmm.
- Giuliani and Thompson in good old fashioned gun fight.
Tags: Barack Obama, Elizabeth Edwards, Fred Thompson, Roll Call, Rudy Giuliani, Rush Limbaugh
With the Emmy nominations now in, we got to thinking — don't the candidates deserve nominations, too? So, we got ourselves a red carpet (actually, it's more of an accent rug), and did some nominating of our own. Here's a breakdown of our nominees for the Candidate Emmy Awards, or Candies…
Close to $2 million in debt and still free-falling in the polls, John McCain gets a nod for "The Biggest Loser." He squares off against Barack Obama of "30 (Ba)Rock" and Sam Brownback for his portrayal of "The God Whisperer." Surprise nomination: New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg, for "Extreme Makeover: Political Party Edition."
The nominees are Hillary Clinton, Hillary Clinton, and Hillary Clinton. Notably missing: Elizabeth Edwards for her star turn in "Desperate Housewives."
The nominees are Chris Dodd's eyebrows, the entire Mike Gravel campaign, and Dennis Kucinich's recent bout with food-poisoning. (He's a vegan. That's hilarious.)
Garnering its first nomination is "According to Mitt," the eleven-part special in which Mitt Romney clarified everything from what he meant when he called himself a hunter to why his staffers like to impersonate cops. His stiffest competition comes from "CSI: Giuliani," a gritty, real-life investigation into the illicit goings-on in various Rudy Giuliani campaign offices.
Of course, in a year that saw the finales of both "The Gilmore Girls" and Jim Gilmore, the 2007 Candies are not without their fair share of snubs. John Edwards (Best Supporting Actor, 2004) received only one nomination, in the category of Outstanding Hair and Makeup. Conspicuously absent from the list: Duncan Hunter, Mike Huckabee, Bill Richardson, Tommy Thompson, and Tom Tancredo. Don't look for them to be nominated for anything any time soon.
Did we miss anyone who deserves a Candie this year? Post your own nominations!
Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Richardson, Candidate Casting Couch, Chris Dodd, Dennis Kucinich, Duncan Hunter, Elizabeth Edwards, Hillary Clinton, Jim Gilmore, John McCain, Mike Gravel, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, Rudy Giuliani, Sam Brownback, The Emmys, Tom Tancredo, Tommy Thompson
- Candidate refuses to discuss candidacy.
- We need to fight vaporized water over there so we don't have to fight it here.
- Will Ann Romney's "delicate balance" trump Elizabeth Edward's "cancer"?
- Awwww… Look at Joe Biden, he thinks he's viable.
- Ron Paul wins coveted Grand Wizard endorsement.
Tags: Ann Romney, David Duke, Elizabeth Edwards, Joe Biden, John McCain, Roll Call, Ron Paul