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George Tiller
  • Scott Roeder Convicted of First Degree Murder

    Good news out of Kansas today: Scott Roeder — abortion activist, religious zealot, terrorist, murderer — is going to jail forever just like he should

    Reporting from Wichita, Kan. – In a trial that never became the referendum on abortion that some abortion foes wanted, Scott Roeder, a 51-year-old airport shuttle driver, was convicted today of murdering George Tiller, one the nation's few physicians who performed late-term abortions.

    The jury of seven men and five women deliberated for only 37 minutes. Roeder faces life in prison after being convicted of first-degree murder.

    Only 37 minutes? I think that's a typo. That sentence should probably read "The jury of seven men and five women deliberated for a whole 37 minutes, which seems like way way too much time." That makes more sense.

    Don't get me wrong, unlike Liz Cheney, I believe that people accused of crimes have rights and should not just be thrown into jail like this is medieval Europe or some shit. But, c'mon, 37 minutes seems like an excessive amount of time for this decision.

    What probably happened is that they deliberated for 7 minutes and then watched an episode of 30 Rock, because that show has been really killing it lately. Do you think Jack and Nancy will ever get together for real? I really want to, but I don't. But, who knows, maybe I'm wrong.

    Anyway, Scott Roeder. Looks like that guy's gonna rot in jail. Good.

    Tags: Abortion, Christianity, George Tiller, Kansas, Religion, Scott Roeder, Terrorism
  • George Tiller's Clinic Closing Its Doors Forever

    Hey, crazy people in the world. Here's a lesson for you: If you work hard enough, harass people with whom you disagree persistently enough, allow blind hatred to become the driving force of your life enough, and get at least one of your buddies to murder people enough, then all of your dreams can come true

    The Wichita abortion clinic run by a doctor who was shot and killed will remain closed permanently, his family said on Tuesday.

    Dr. George R. Tiller’s clinic was one of the few in the country to provide abortions to women late in their pregnancies, and for decades, women had traveled there from all over the nation and from overseas. It was also the only remaining abortion clinic, even for first trimester abortions, in the Wichita region.

    It's so heart-warming to see American fundamentalist terrorist organizations really taking to heart all the things they've learned from their counterparts in the Middle East.

    Tags: Abortion, al Qaeda, Christianity, George Tiller, Islam, Kansas, Religion, Scott Roeder, Taliban
  • Anti-Abortion Protesters at Loss for Whom Next to Drive into the Grave

    It's so bittersweet. You work tirelessly for years and years and years in pursuit of a single goal, and then when you finally achieve it, you face a really odd situation. You're super proud for having realized your goal, but you're also kind of adrift, purposeless.

    That's pretty much what the anti-abortion protesters in Kansas must be experiencing right now…

    For the first time in years, only a Wichita police car has been waiting outside the abortion clinic of Dr. George R. Tiller, who was shot to death a week ago. Gone are the trucks bearing enormous images of bloody fetuses, the signs offering the home addresses of clinic workers, the crowd of protesters yelling to women as they enter…

    Over almost 20 years, a vocal, diverse constellation of anti-abortion forces has grown up in this conservative city with an intensity rarely seen elsewhere, converging around Dr. Tiller’s practice. With his death, its future suddenly seems uncertain, too.

    "I don't know what the future holds," said Troy Newman, the president of Operation Rescue, one of the most well-known anti-abortion organizations. Seven years ago, Mr. Newman moved his organization's national headquarters, its leaders and his family from Southern California to Wichita to focus a national spotlight on Dr. Tiller, whom he described as "the flagship" of the country's abortion business.

    "I think it's too early to say what comes next," he said.

    Yeah, who can really say what comes next? Will they find another abortion doctor to harrass continuously? And will they ultimately murder that doctor or perhaps just torture him until he can't remember his name? Will they just begin randomly snipering women as they walk out of planned parenthood facilities?

    Or maybe — just maybe — they'll pray so hard and so seriously that they'll be able to coax Jesus down from His Kingdom in Heaven, and he'll pull out his semi-automatic and lead the charge against the agents of evil, the godless and the everyone else who contributed money to Democratic campaigns.

    It's just too early to say what comes next.

    Tags: Abortion, Christianity, George Tiller, Kansas, Religion, Scott Roeder
  • Sean Hannity and the Un-Inflating of George Tiller

    A large inflatable ball in a junior-high-school locker room attempts to explain for you the finer points of the George Tiller's assassination and Sean Hannity's response to it

    George Tiller was an expert at ending human inflation in the months just before a human small ball's SOI. He performed many of these procedures at his clinic in Kansas. People who disagreed with him tried to do him harm. He had been shot once before, fifteen years ago, and was threatened often.

    Then, on Sunday, while he was at church, a man who believed that George Tiller's human-inflation-ending procedures were a form of murder walked up to George Tiller and deflated him with a gun…

    When Coach Parker finally arrived and turned on the radio, Sean Hannity was talking about Sonia Sotomayor's nomination to the Supreme Court. That was important, but it didn't seem as important as the fact that a man at the center of one of the nation's most contentious moral dilemmas had been murdered. I figured he'd get to it in a second. But then he started talking about how Barack Obama went on a date in New York City the same weekend that General Motors was declaring bankruptcy.

    I think you should just read the entirety of Ben Greenman's story on McSweeney's.

    Tags: Abortion, George Tiller, Scott Roeder, Sean Hannity
  • Can We Just Trade Juan Williams to Fox News for Shepard Smith and a D-Bag to Be Named Later?

    While we're on the subject of horrible liberal people who should just go away, I guess now is as good a time as any to talk about this shit from left-wing rag doll Juan Williams

    [W]henever Bill O'Reilly feels threatened he summons Juan Williams to appear on The Factor to apologize for BillO's actions. Last night Juan did his job well…

    Williams: "There are people who are going to try and use this now to make others who have critical of a women having the right to choose, make that into a political tool to beat people up and to try and convince people that these are all extremists and the fact is that you're not extremist. There are a lot of people who by a matter of conscience are troubled by abortion, especially late term abortion and I know you O'Reilly, what you did is you said it bothered you personally and there's nothing wrong with that…

    "But let me just say, they're going after you, Bill O'Reilly and I've never heard you say to block a clinic , I've never heard you say to create violence to intimidate women who are legally seeking an abortion. I've never heard you say go after the doctor's, berate them, certainly not kill them. Never. Never! Not true."

    Wow! He really makes Alan Colmes look like a linebacker… holding a machete… in his prehensile penis.

    Crooks and Liars has footage of O'Reilly not going after the doctor, not berating him. Never. Never!

    Tags: Abortion, Bill O'Reilly, Fox, George Tiller, Juan Williams, Scott Roeder, Shepard Smith