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Health
  • 7 Delicious Surprises Found in Food This Week

    From a knife in a birthday cake to metal fragments in breakfast biscuits, this week people have found a lot of weird surprises lurking in their chow.

    This might be the first time in history when Americans have been angry about getting free stuff.

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    Tags: FDA, Food, Health
  • Oregon Bill Could Ban Cigarettes

    Dear America, Oregon has a story to tell you about what happens when some of your legislators quit smoking tobacco and start puffing slightly more psychedelic substances: they decide that effectively criminalizing cigarettes would be a swell idea.

    Rep. Mitch Greenlick (D-Portlandia) has filed a bill that would make nicotine a Schedule III substance, placing it in the same category as ketamine, lysergic acid and anabolic steroids, and would make having it without a doctor's note a crime. Nicotine-containing products would only be available from pharmacies with a prescription.

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    Tags: Crime, Health, Oregon, Smoking
  • Social Conservatives Identify New Threat to Military: Yoga

    It's been over a year now since "don't ask, don't tell" was repealed, enabling gay and lesbian members of the military to serve openly without keeping their sexual identity under wraps. Contrary to the predictions of some social conservatives who spent a suspicious amount of time obsessing about gay sex, the DADT repeal didn't turn the Pentagon into a gay bacchanalian orgy pit and the U.S. military remains a professional, cohesive, fearsome fighting force.

    Which means it's time for the Christian Right to find something new to fearmonger about. Enter Tony Perkins, who argues that the ability to do the downward facing dog pose is the first step on the road to perdition…

    "In the military, it's out with God — and in with the goofy! Hello, I'm Tony Perkins with the Family Research Council in Washington. As part some new training, Marines are being asked to join weekly yoga and meditation classes…Unfortunately, the military seems intent on driving religion out and replacing it with wacky substitutes. They've added atheist chaplains, Wiccan worship centers, and now, meditation classes. But none of them are as effective or as constructive as a personal relationship with God. Unfortunately, though, it's mind over what matters — and that's faith."

    Remember, if you're a Marine who can stretch to pickup an artillery shell without pulling a muscle, you're basically an enemy combatant.

    Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Family Research Council, Health, Military, Religion, Tony Perkins
  • 13 Things Americans Banned in 2012

    We live in the land of the free, which means we're free to ban just about anything we don't like. In 2012 Americans dropped the ban hammer on public nuisances from goose livers to "gateway sexual activity."

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    Tags: Advertising, Alcohol, California, Colorado, Fashion, Food, Health, Health Care, Los Angeles, Massachusetts, New York City, San Francisco, Sex, Television, Utah
  • John Kerry Becomes an Altitude Truther

    Though national polls have stabilized recently, Democrats are still wondering what drove Barack Obama to flounder at the first presidential debate in Denver, Colorado. As the surrogate tasked with portraying Mitt Romney during the Obama's prep sessions, perhaps John Kerry has special insight into what went wrong for the president

    Asked whether it surprised him that Obama gave such a lackluster performance in his first debate with Romney, Kerry said, "He knows he had a bad night. He just had a bad night… I personally really do believe that the altitude may have had something to do with it."

    With that, Kerry became the second prominent Democrat, after Al Gore, to subscribe to the thin-air theory. And though neither of them are doctors, I think we should trust Gore and Kerry to diagnose altitude sickness.

    After all, fatigue, listlessness and drowsiness are all symptoms Kerry and Gore have seen over and over again, in people who have been exposed to them for any length of time.

    Photo by Andrew Burton/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Al Gore, Barack Obama, Colorado, Health, John Kerry