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Heath Shuler
  • Nancy Pelosi and Lisa Murkowski Get to Keep Their Jobs

    Despite a lot of hoopla and kerfuffle amongst pundits, it appears as though two of Congress' highest profile women have managed to successfully fend off rearguard attacks from men representing more conservative factions of their own parties.

    Nancy Pelosi will continue to lead the House Democrats in feckless futility

    Nancy Pelosi has been elected to lead House Democrats in the new Congress despite presiding over the loss of more than 60 House seats in the midterm elections. Pelosi ultimately had little trouble repelling the challenge from [North Carolina Rep. Heath] Shuler, one of the relatively-conservative Blue Dog Democrats who saw their numbers decimated in the midterms. The secret ballot vote was 150 for Pelosi to 43 for Shuler.

    And Lisa Murkowski will continue work with Senate Republicans to block all meaningful progress from occurring

    Sen. Lisa Murkowski has become the first Senate candidate in more than 50 years to win a write-in campaign. Ms. Murkowski emerged victorious after a painstaking, two-week count of write-in ballots showed she has overtaken tea party rival Joe Miller. Her victory became clear when Alaska election officials confirmed they had only about 700 votes left to count, putting Ms. Murkowski in safe territory to win re-election.

    This isn't just a good day for Pelosi and Murkowski. Nor just for women nationwide. It's good for all taxpayers in the country. Because the Senate just voted against a bill that would have made us have to pay these women the same amount as the dudes who were trying to take their jobs. Score!

    The Senate voted 58-41 against allowing debate on the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would help end discriminatory pay practices against women. It had already passed the House. More than 45 years after passage of the Equal Pay Act, the pay gap shockingly persists with women still earning on average 77 cents to every man's dollar…

    Not a single Republican supported the bill, including Sens. Olympia Snowe (R-ME) and Susan Collins (R-ME)… Sen. Ben Nelson (D-NE)… was the lone Democrat voting against the bill today. Sen. Lisa Murkowski (R-AK) was not present for the vote.

    Nice to know Murkowski will soon be back where she belongs, on the Senate floor, voting in lockstep with her party, teaching young women an important lesson. That women are just as adept at subjugating women as any man.

    Tags: Heath Shuler, House of Representatives, Joe Miller, Lisa Murkowski, Men and Women, Money, Nancy Pelosi, Senate
  • NC Representative Claims He Sucked at Football, Rules at Politics

    You are undoubtedly familiar with the Blue Dog Coalition, those handsome and talented conservative-to-moderate-but-mostly-conservative Democrats who came together after Republicans took the House of Representatives in 1994. They call themselves Blue Dogs because they’re all Furries who enjoy being spanked by female Smurfs. But while they may enjoy the tender ministrations of Dominatrix Smurf, they do not, on the whole, enjoy one Nancy Pelosi.

    Third-term Blue Dog Dem and former NFL disappointment Rep. Heath Shuler of North Carolina took the rhetorically-unprecedented step of applying a sports analogy (CAN YOU IMAGINE?!) to illustrate an opinion–in this case, opposition to Pelosi's bid for House Minority Leader

    "It's no different than me as a quarterback," he said in an interview here on Thursday. "I didn't play very good. So what they'd do? They benched me."

    Let’s get something straight, Heath. The Redskins didn’t bench you because you "didn't play very good." They benched you because you didn’t play very well. (You really didn’t.)

    Moving on, let’s imagine who Rep. Heath Shuler might prefer as his House Minority Leader.

    * Vince Lombardi (Were you aware that he coached the Redskins in 1969? This is a Fun Fact about a team with a horribly racist name! Also, ha-ha, " '69."

    * An actual blue dog. Specifically, the dog from "Blue's Clues."

    * Rep. Heath Shuler.

    Tags: Democrats, Football, Heath Shuler, House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi, North Carolina, Sports