Tweet Untweet: Pay No Attention to that Man-Made Warming

#Sandy wasn't caused by global warming, but it might have contributed greatly to it's size & force. Either way, I hope no one looks into it.

— Eugene Mirman (@EugeneMirman) October 30, 2012

Quote Unquote: Hurricane Update

New York State Assembly member Phillip Goldfeder gives an update on his district…

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"In Breezy Point, whatever is not flooded is on fire."

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From this, I think we can extrapolate that anything that is neither flooded nor on fire is not in Breezy Point. That's got to have some useful application, right?

Brownie: What's Obama's Rush with Responding to Sandy?

Michael "Brownie" Brown — who was immortalized as a symbol of heckuva job-ness following his work as the head of FEMA during Hurricane Katrina — knows a thing or two about responding to natural disasters. After all, he took calls from President Bush all the time.

So, when he asks: What's the deal with Obama's rush to help people during Hurricane Sandy?, it makes you wonder: Hey, what's the deal with that?

"One thing he's gonna be asked is, why did he jump on this so quickly and go back to D.C. so quickly when in… Benghazi, he went to Las Vegas?" Brown says. "Why was this so quick?… At some point, somebody's going to ask that question… This is like the inverse of Benghazi."

Really, it's kind of ridiculous. I mean, these people haven't even had a chance to start building shanty towns on top of their roofs let alone make their way into the later stages of dehydration. Come on! There is a way that these things are done. This is bush league nonsense.

Er, I mean, it's not Bush league nonsense.

Photo by Bill Pugliano/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Mitt Romney to Hold "Storm Relief" Events

I think, regardless of your ideological bent, you can appreciate the tough spot that Mitt Romney finds himself in today.

It's one week till Election Day, and he's trailing slightly in the most crucial states, and suddenly a storm hits and now — not only can he not campaign for fear of looking insensitive, but the President gets to go on television and look presidential in a time of emergency while being lavished with bipartisan praise for the job he and the federal government are doing. A job which, it might be worth mentioning, Romney has gone on record as saying, a president and the federal government should not do. So, yeah, tough spot to be in.

So, what do you do? Well, there's not much to do. But, you've got to do something. And this is probably it…

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Chris Christie Says Nice Things About Barack Obama

Those of you who woke up on the East Coast may be tempted to believe that, during the night, your domicile was picked up and swept away to a magical far off land where up is down and left is right and Happy Endings is as clever as people pretend it is and Republicans have decent things to say about Democratic presidents.

And, who knows, maybe you have been…

On NBC's "Today," Christie said the president had been "outstanding" and FEMA's response has been "excellent."

The GOP governor also sent out a thankful tweet: "I want to thank the President personally for all his assistance as w recover from the storm."

"It's been very good working with the president," Christie said on MSNBC's "Morning Joe." "He and his administration have been coordinating with us. It’s been wonderful."

Okay, now, you may think that such nice words for Barack Obama and the federal government coming from a Republican governor would reflect well upon the President as we head into the final week of election season, but actually nothing could be farther from the truth. In reality, this proves what conservatives have been saying about Obama and Big Government all along. And for a very simple reason.

Because… Hold on, on give a second here. I've got this this. It's because… it shows… that… um… Well, hang on. It undeniably proves that… given certain… parameters… of the… Overton window…

Look, the guy's a socialist. And we can't afford four more years of his failed policies. Also, something something Iran.

Photo by Michael N. Todaro/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images