Every year, starting about five minutes ago, we at Indecision choose a handful of lucky nominees for a handful of categories to be in the running for the very prestigious Biggest Douchebag Awards.
This year, we are lucky to find ourselves being sponsored by Denis Leary's brand new, soon-to-drop Comedy Central special Douchebags & Donuts, which coincidentally has the word "douchebags" in its title. Synchronicity!
Here are the nominees. You choose the winners!
The Biggest Douchebag in the Republican Party
More nominees after the jump.
Denis Leary's Douchebags & Donuts premiers on Comedy Central Sunday, January 16 at 10pm / 9c.
Tags: Ben Nelson, Bill Maher, Eric Cantor, Glenn Beck, Harry Reid, Hugo Chavez, Iran, Italy, James Carville, Joe Barton, John Edwards, John McCain, Juan Williams, Karl Rove, Keith Olbermann, Kim Jong Il, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Michael Moore, Michele Bachmann, Michelle Malkin, North Korea, Pat Robertson, Rahm Emanuel, Rod Blagojevich, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, Silvio Berlusconi, Venezuela, Zimbabwe
Some world leaders make the task look so dreary and dull. They bend over backwards to convince the masses that they are just regular folks, and in so doing they bore us into submission. Not Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi!
This horny rascal is a media tycoon with a Murdochian hold on Italy's news media. He's also fond of endearing stunts like faux-humping a meter maid as she goes about her business. Oh, then there are the stories from prostitutes (at least one a teenager) alleging that Berlusconi paid them for sex and held lavish boning parties. And he recently defended himself by saying, "It's better to be passionate about a beautiful girl than a gay."But Tuesday's two confidence votes on Berlusconi's government threatened to yank this wondrous PM out of public office! Thankfully, he and his center-right party survived both votes…
On Tuesday, the man who brought personality-driven politics to a nation once known for its revolving-door governments once again proved that his personal fate was inexorably entwined with that of his country’s.
In spite of the victory, both were plunged into political uncertainty. With a three-vote majority, and with a breakaway group from his own coalition voting against him, Mr. Berlusconi no longer has the margin to govern. It is an open question whether he can broaden his majority through new alliances.
He's probably throwing a giant bangin' orgy right now. Doing the tarantella with a naked underage hooker generally soothes any "political uncertainty." At least temporarily.
Tags: Italy, Sex, Silvio Berlusconi
Have you people heard that there's a World Cup going on? Seems like every time you turn around there's some kind of World Cup happening, doesn't it? Well, this one is for Soccer, or — as the rest of the world calls it — Non-American Football.
Naturally, as Americans, we here at the Indecision blog are super amped for this not-at-all-tedious tournament. And we'll help you get amped in equal parts by filling you in on all the important games that you should be paying attention to. But first, here's everything you need to know about Soccer…
* No player may touch the ball with his hands ever. Except for the goalie. And everybody else on the team under certain circumstances. The breaking of this rule is punishable by death.
* The less scoring that occurs in a game, the more exciting it is!
* The Ancient Greeks and Romans are known to have played many ball games, some of which involved the use of the feet. The Roman game harpastum is believed to have been adapted from a Greek team game known as "ἐπίσκυρος" (episkyros) or "φαινίνδα" (phaininda), which is mentioned by a Greek playwright, Antiphanes (388–311 BC) and later referred to by the Christian theologian Clement of Alexandria (c.150-c.215 AD).
* You totally do not want to accidentally forget to wear your cup when being forced by your parents to play soccer back in grade school. Because, ugh, that pain is profound and life altering.
Now that you know everything you need to know about soccer, here's a rundown of this weekend's biggest, most important games to watch for…
Tags: Algeria, Denmark, Germany, Italy, New Zealand, Serbia, Soccer, Sports, United Kingdom
Just accidentally stumbled across this quote…
"I have been a racist since 1921. I don't know how they can think I'm imitating Hitler."
…..– Benito Mussolini
Hey, who can blame Il Duce? Can you imagine how mortifying it would be to show up at the Axis Spring Pageant and discover that you and der Führer were wearing the exact same antisemitic gown?
Tags: Adolf Hitler, Fascism, Italy, Quote Unquote, Racism, WWII