Hey, so the good news is that Rush Limbaugh has — for the fourth time — found everlasting happiness in the sanctity of marriage with a human female. And the even better news is that he has made so much money in his job selling hatred to angry people, that he was able to purchase outspoken marriage equality advocate Elton John's soul for an evening. Well, if that isn't the sweetest…
[A]ccording to a News Corporation (which owns Fox News) wire report, the Rocket Man, 63, serenaded the 400 guests into the wee hours Saturday night to celebrate the marriage of Limbaugh, 59, to Kathryn Rogers, 33, in the Ponce de Leon ballroom of Florida's fabled Breakers hotel in Palm Beach. Sir Elton's fee: $1 million, the report notes.
Well, at least Elton John got a million dollars out it. That'll come in handy if anything ever happens to the 200 thousand other millions of dollars he already has. You know, every little bit counts.
And also, I suppose he had the pleasure of perform before an exceedingly distinguished collection of wedding guests…
Amid dozens of giant bouquets of white roses (and very tight security), reports the Palm Beach Post, guests at the wedding included former Bush adviser Karl Rove; actor-politician Fred Thompson; former Kansas City Royals slugger George Brett; Fox News commentator Sean Hannity; former New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani; New England Patriots owner Bob Kraft; former Clinton adviser James Carville and his wife, GOP analyst Mary Matalin; and golfer Tom Watson. A wedding guest also tells PEOPLE that among the others was Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas.
Yikes! My god! That is literally like one of those Abbott & Costello movies in which they pack every movie monsters they can think of. We have no definitive details about what happened at this party, but I'm one hundred percent certain that at some point Sean Hannity and James Carville must have had some kind of stiff-armed wrestling match on top of a mountain during a thunderstorm. And the Creature from the Black Lagoon probably used that opportunity to hit on Mary Matalin. Or maybe it was Rudy Giuliani. Whatever. Same thing pretty much.
Sunday morning, a source tells PEOPLE, the newlyweds hopped Limbaugh's private Gulfstream jet for a honeymoon in Mexico, Africa and a couple other spots.
Aaaaahhhhh!!! Now I have Rush Limbaugh's honeymoon in my brain! Get it out! Get it out! Get it out!
The wire service also quotes the new bride as saying of the couple's 26-year age gap: "I'm sometimes not able to relate to the average person my age."
Well, then good for her. Sounds like she found just the right match. Because "average" and "person" are definitely not words generally associated with Limbaugh.
Tags: Elton John, James Carville, Marriage Equality, Mary Matalin, Music, Rudy Giuliani, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity
This morning, on Good Morning America, Democratic strategist and pundit James Carville showed off his talents by doing his best James Carville impersonation while reprimanding President Obama for his seeming inaction on the BP oil spillsaster. On the whole, it wasn't bad. A little over the top, but not bad…
Tags: Barack Obama, British Columbia, Energy & Oil, Gulf Coast, James Carville, Louisiana
On last night's Colbert Report, Stephen spoke via satellite to James Carville, who is campaigning for Ashraf Ghani in Afghanistan's upcoming presidential election. It seems like a bit of an odd match, but after the work Carville did in the 2008 US presidential election, I think Ghani has a real shot at being Afghanistan's next Secretary of State.
The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.
Tags: Afghanistan, Hamid Karzai, James Carville, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Video
Take one blowhard radio host whose popularity peaked around the same time as the Counting Crows'.
Add a newly emboldened Democratic party in search of a non-Bush nemesis and a Republican party in search of a leader, or a magic Twitter account, or anything, really.
Let rise until the blowhard radio host says something blowhard-y about how he hopes the new Democratic president fails to bring about economic recovery in the midst of a recession.
Combine with abject groveling, grandstanding, indignation, feigned outrage, real outrage, jokey websites and accusations of unnecessary distraction.
Garnish with a dollop of David Plouffe.
Serve as often as necessary.
Tags: Barack Obama, David Plouffe, Democrats, Economy, James Carville, Rush Limbaugh
From 7 a.m. to 9 p.m. (depending on your precinct), November 4th will be spent voting for our representative government in our proud, 232 year-old tradition.
After that, the riots begin…
Police departments in cities across the country are beefing up their ranks for Election Day, preparing for possible civil unrest and riots after the historic presidential contest…
Sen. Obama (Ill.), the Democratic nominee for president, has seen his lead over rival Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) grow in recent weeks, prompting speculation that there could be a violent backlash if he loses unexpectedly.
But don't take the cops' word for it. Take James Carville's…
"You stop and contemplate this country if Obama goes in and he has a consistent five point lead and loses the election, it would be very, very, very dramatic out there."
Translation: Full-scale riots. Lock up your children. Invest in body armor. Particularly if you live in one of these politically volatile areas…
* Cincinnati: Ohio's African-American voters were already disenfranchised at the polls in 2004. If it happens again, expect a rush that would put the woeful Bengals to shame.
* Wasilla, Alaska: If Sarah Palin loses her VP bid, expect the resident moose population to take the brunt of local frustration.
* Boston: It would only get ugly here if the underdog winner of the election turns out to be the Red Sox.
Tags: Alaska, Barack Obama, James Carville, Massachusetts, Ohio