Comedians tweeting the news is just like angsty suburban teens performing acoustic covers of forgotten 80's songs: never appropriate and always hilarious.
It's always so darn surprising to find out that failed leaders had troubled childhoods. Although the whole 'being shown a fetus by your mother when you were a teenager' thing is getting kinda old.
Tags: Abortion, Barbara Bush, Charlie Rangel, Cindy McCain, DADT, George W. Bush, Jeb Bush, John McCain, Sarah Palin, Twitter, Tworld News
Well, it's been nearly two whole weeks since the Midterm elections, so you know what that means don't you?! It means we're officially entering into the 2012 presidential election season. (Technically speaking, we entered that about seven months ago, but now we don't have any other distractions.)
So, let's not waste any more time not speculating on who'll be running in opposition to Barack Obama and Joe Biden. Let's start speculating on who'll be running in opposition to Barack Obama and Joe Biden!
Some people think that it should be Paul instead of Paul at the top of the ticket, but those people are obviously idiots.
Obviously, this is just a stepping stone to Jar-Fetus Bush 2020.
More speculation after the jump…
Tags: Christine O’Donnell, Hillary Clinton, Jeb Bush, Lisa Murkowski, Michele Bachmann, Rand Paul, Ron Paul, Sarah Palin
Jeb Bush was recently asked by Newsmax what he thought of the prospects of a Sarah Palin presidential run…
"My personal belief is that for Governor Palin to be a successful candidate for higher office, she needs to take this charisma she has and also add to it some depth of understanding of the complexity of life that we're living in today.
"If she had the combination of that, she would be a formidable candidate."
Also, if she had wings and radiation-proof skin, she could fly up to the sun, build a palace out of molten sun materials and declare herself Queen of the Solar System. So, you know, that's also on the table.
This statement is essentially the exact same thing that every person on the left has been saying about her for the past year-and-a-half, but Bush managed to do it without using either the words "brain" or "dead."
Tags: Jeb Bush, Sarah Palin
The other day, we tasked ourselves with choosing — from amongst a coterie of conservative ladies – whom we'd most like to to Grill (barbecue with), Grill (conduct a comprehensive interview with) and Grill (cover their teeth with some phat gold teeth).
Today, we're doing the same thing with members of the Bush family: George, George Jr. and Jeb. Here's what we came up with…
Grill – George W. Bush
Okay, okay, okay. So, Dubya's not so much of a president. Nor much of an oil magnate. Nor much of baseball executive. But, come on, he's gotta be good at something, right?
And we saw that Oliver Stone movie. Who among you would not want to party with the main character from that film. You might not want him to decide your children's future, but we'll bet he comes to the cook-out with a fully stocked cooler. (And you'd better believe there's something extra special buried beneath the ice at the bottom. Shhhhhh…)
Come on, he's Wiffleball Tony. That's gotta be what he's good for.
Tags: George H.W. Bush, George W. Bush, Grill (x3), Iraq, Jeb Bush
If you think the GOP is down and out, well, you're right. But America loves an underdog, and the Republicans are technically underdogs now. Sort of in the same way John Kreese was an underdog in Karate Kid II, but underdogs nonetheless. The point is, the party of Lincoln is regrouping, rebranding and rebuilding, and they're going to be back on top faster than you can say "Plumber/Bachmann 2012."
The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.
Tags: Jeb Bush, Jon Stewart, Michael Steele, Mitt Romney, Republicans, The Daily Show, Video