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Jesse Ventura
  • Why Is Jesse Ventura Wasting All His Good Points on Dumb People?

    Yesterday, Jesse Ventura — the former professional wrestler who has a smarter, more morally defensible take on torture than our president does — went on The View, of all places, yesterday to fight about the definition of "waterboarding" with Elizabeth Hasselbeck.

    Then, last night, he swung by Sean Hannity's sound stage*…

    And then, this morning, he was on Fox and Friends

    So, he's obviously making the media circuit in descending order of intelligence. I wonder what's next on his schedule? Too bad The Tony Danza Show isn't still on the air.


    * Watching that clip made my brain hurt. I can't even imagine what it must be like to get your world view from Sean Hannity. With the sense of reality you'd be left with, how would you even manage to perform basic everyday tasks?

    Tags: 9/11, al Qaeda, Barack Obama, Barry Goldwater, Elizabeth Hasselbeck, Fox, George W. Bush, Jesse Ventura, Minnesota, Osama bin Laden, Ronald Reagan, Sean Hannity, Torture
  • Jesse Ventura and Elizabeth Hasselbeck Wrestle Over Torture on The View

    This video of former Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura body slamming Elizabeth Hasselbeck's absurd pro-torture apologetics on The View makes me wish that he was still a prominent player in the world of politics.

    Or the world of wrestling. Whatever. It's pretty much all the same thing.

    (The torture debate begins at about the one-minute mark.)

    That fight looked more gruesome that it probably was in reality. I'm sure that Ventura and Hasselbeck planned out all those moves beforehand.

    You gotta realize that this stuff is all a big show.

    (via City Pages)

    Tags: Dick Cheney, Elizabeth Hasselbeck, Guantanamo Bay, Iraq, Jesse Ventura, Minnesota, The View, Torture
  • Jesse Ventura Joins Al Franken in Senate Battle Royale

    Jesse "The Body" Ventura is getting back into Minnesota politics, this time running for Senate against incumbent Republican Norm Coleman and Democratic challenger and "funny" man Al Franken, because, you know, the race for that seat wasn't gonna be quite wacky enough

    Ventura, born Jim Janos, tells Welna that the main reason he's running is because of Coleman's support for the war in Iraq. "That's the reason I run," he says. "I run because it angers me…

    "All you Minnesotans take a good hard look at all three of us. And you decide: if you were in a dark alley which one of the three of us would you want with you?"

    Granted, that's probably most appropriate way to choose our elected officials. But I'm not sure that, based upon that logic, Ventura is gonna get the results he wants.

    First of all, Ventura just told us that he's angry, and we know he's pretty huge. And if I remember correctly from watching the WWF as a kid, he's kind of shiftless and unpredictable. For all I know, he'd take advantage of the darkness of the alley to whack me with a folding chair.

    As for Coleman, I'm really not that familiar with his physique, but because he's a Republican in Congress, I can only assume he's a closeted homosexual. I'm not saying he is, but that does seem to be the trend doesn't it. And if there's one thing I've learned about closeted homosexuals is that they've got a lot of pent up rage. (Plus, if I'm in a dark alley, I'm probably trying to give somebody an abortion, and I don't need no Republicans interfering.)

    So, I guess I'd go with Al Franken. I still think he could kick my ass, but probably not as badly as the other two.

    Tags: Al Franken, Jesse Ventura, Minnesota, Norm Coleman, Senate