How to Throw President Obama a Good Party

In a press conference today, President Obama made the following comment: "Most people who know me know I'm a pretty friendly guy. And I like a good party."

If you analyze this quote with zero context, you'll probably come to one of two conclusions: A.) The President was doing a dated, mean-spirited impression of Mitt Romney, or B.) He was summarizing the basic theme of every Black Eyed Peas song he's ever heard.

Assuming Obama is being honest and he is not a president who hates a good party (like, say, a President Nixon or a President Grumpy Cat) the question remains, what constitutes a "good party" for President Obama?

* Chips and salsa, paid for with taxes collected from the one percent.

* Plenty of beer, in case he wants to throw an impromptu beer summit.

* Beyonce. She's always invited to his parties.

* Joe Biden is not allowed anywhere near the DJ booth, lest he play Jefferson Starship all night.

* John Boehner is also not allowed. If he didn't let Obama raise the debt ceiling, imagine the fuss he'd make over Obama raising the roof.

All this, of course, presumes President Obama is not referring to a political party. Everyone knows there's no such thing as a good political party.

Previously
Barack Obama Now Bribing Voters with Beer
Key & Peele: Obama's Most Inspirational College Party Ever

Photo by Jim Watson/AFP/Getty Images

Tags: Barack Obama, Beyonce, Joe Biden, John Boehner

A Guide to Musical Pandering at the Inauguration

Say what you will about President Obama's performance as chief executive, the man's doing a pretty good job as the head of America's P.R. department.

His team knows the Inauguration is a perfect opportunity to appeal to as many demographics as possible, which would explain the musical performers who were announced today.

But the question remains, who is the Obama administration targeting with each performer? Specifically?

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Tags: Barack Obama, Beyonce, Inauguration, James Taylor, Jay-Z, Joe Biden, Kanye West, Kelly Clarkson, Music

Tweet Untweet: Gonzo VP

If Joe Biden didn't exist, Hunter S. Thompson would've had to invent him.

— Bearded Stoner (@beardedstoner) January 4, 2013

Tags: Joe Biden, Tweet Untweet, Twitter

Our Endorsements: Science Fact Friday

* Droppin' some science on y'all.

* Joe Biden loves babies.

* Old war photos you have to see to believe.

* "Fake but accurate."

* He steals from the rich, and gives nothing in return.

* Not for the faint of heart, this is what it's like to drive in Russia.

* This summary of great podcast comedy from 2012 hits the mark.

* Move over, Joe Biden and Newt Gingrich, Nancy Pelosi wants in on the TV comedy too.

Tags: Daily Links, Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, Russia, Science & Technology, The Onion, Tina Fey, WWII

Americans Demand a Joe Biden Reality Show

Spiro Agnew, one of Joe Biden's extremely uncomedic vice presidential predecessors, once called American television a "vast wasteland." This may soon change.

Proposing an idea so logical as to be almost obvious once you've heard it, petitioners are asking the Obama administration to sanction a Joe Biden reality TV show…

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Tags: CSPAN, Joe Biden, Television, White House