Take a look at these two Back in Black segments, and compare how much more hyped up Lewis Black gets at the prospect of The Donald in the White House two nights ago on The Daily Show, as opposed to twelve years ago, when we last faced the threat of a Trump candidacy…
Can you even imagine how he'll respond to the 2023 announcement by Trump's by-then sentient head of hair?
The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11/10c.
Tags: Birthers, Donald Trump, Kim Jong Il, Lewis Black, Primaries, Republicans, Saddam Hussein, The Daily Show, Video
Hot heir apparent Kim Jong-un of Korea has reportedly ascended to the second-highest position in the land. Yes, he was elected in a tight but decisive and totally ethical victory over — haha, J/K, this is North Korea! His dad totally just made the announcement at his own dictator-themed bday shindig while, like, eating all the food he won't let North Korea's starving masses have…
The celebration, typically crowned by a massive turnout of goose-stepping soldiers and dancing, uniformed women in the city’s central square, was punctuated — as it is every year — by a flower show featuring bright red tuberous begonias called kimjongilia.
Yet the events were marred by the leader’s failure to follow through on a promise of a day’s food to all of the country’s 24 million people, The Associated Press reported.
First of all, "kimjongilia" sounds like the name of a) a pretty pretty princess or b) a social disease.
Second of all, the AP is obviously just packed with haterz who don't understand Kim Jong-il's clever strategy to avoid the obesity problems that plague the Great Enemy, the United States of Fatties.
So congratulations, Kim Jong-un! You are undoubtedly eminently qualified to be the almost-Supreme Leader!
Tags: Kim Jong Il, Kim Jong-un, North Korea
Every year, starting about five minutes ago, we at Indecision choose a handful of lucky nominees for a handful of categories to be in the running for the very prestigious Biggest Douchebag Awards.
This year, we are lucky to find ourselves being sponsored by Denis Leary's brand new, soon-to-drop Comedy Central special Douchebags & Donuts, which coincidentally has the word "douchebags" in its title. Synchronicity!
Here are the nominees. You choose the winners!
The Biggest Douchebag in the Republican Party
More nominees after the jump.
Denis Leary's Douchebags & Donuts premiers on Comedy Central Sunday, January 16 at 10pm / 9c.
Tags: Ben Nelson, Bill Maher, Eric Cantor, Glenn Beck, Harry Reid, Hugo Chavez, Iran, Italy, James Carville, Joe Barton, John Edwards, John McCain, Juan Williams, Karl Rove, Keith Olbermann, Kim Jong Il, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Michael Moore, Michele Bachmann, Michelle Malkin, North Korea, Pat Robertson, Rahm Emanuel, Rod Blagojevich, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, Silvio Berlusconi, Venezuela, Zimbabwe
Luckily for Barack Obama, there are no other matters that need his attention these days, so he's free to devote his time to shit like this…
President Barack Obama plans to call South Korean President Lee Myung-bak to discuss North Korea's artillery attack Tuesday on a disputed western maritime border between the countries.
The U.S. will stand "shoulder-to-shoulder" with South Korea over the attack, White House Press Secretary Bill Burton said… Burton said the U.S. will work with global leaders in the coming days to figure how to best deal with North Korea's attack. Burton wouldn't say whether the attack was one of provocation.
He said, however, "North Korea has a habit of doing things that are provocative."
Like, there was the time that the totalitarian state did that performance art piece in which it invited people to come up onstage and cut away pieces of its clothes until it was left there totally naked and exposed.
Oh, wait, no. That wasn't North Korea, it was Yoko Ono. I always get them confused. (Which one of them held a couple of American journalists hostage for two weeks again?)
Tags: Barack Obama, Kim Jong Il, North Korea, South Korea
OMG! That delighted, high-pitched, government-mandated collective squee you heard yesterday was the sound of every North Korean girl forcibly expressing "joy." The generous government in Pyongyang released the first-ever public photograph of Kim Jong-Un, the twenty-something understudy for the role of Evil Dictator currently filled by his dad, Kim Jong-Il. And he bears a remarkable resemblance to one Eric Cartman!
But let's look behind the young heartbreaker's facade and find out more about Kim Jong-Un, the purported future leader of the world's most diplomatically isolated country. Take it away, New York Times…
Earlier this week, at a landmark meeting of the Workers’ Party in Pyongyang, the younger Mr. Kim, who is believed to be 27 or 28, was given the rank of four-star general in the People’s Army and was named a deputy chairman of the party’s military commission. He also became a member of the Central Committee of the party, an ideological and policy-making post.
On Thursday, North Korean state media released a picture of Kim Jong-un, news agencies reported. Very little is known about the heir apparent, and few pictures of him have been seen publicly, both in Korea and in the outside world.
Oh, well that clears things up. Let's fill in the blanks. Based on the official photograph, we can assume that young Kim Jong-un finds official photography sessions to be rather dull, or at least not joyful. We can also rest assured that while thousands of other North Koreans (particularly children) may be dying each month from starvation, Kim Jr. has access to all the Cheesy Poofs he can handle. Om nom nom, Kim Jong-un!
Tags: Kim Jong Il, Kim Jong-un, North Korea, South Park