Tweet Untweet: To the Moon, Jong-un!

Hopefully it's Kim Jong-un. RT @ap: BREAKING: NORAD says North Korean missile appears to have launched 'an object' into orbit.

— Eugene Mirman (@EugeneMirman) December 12, 2012

6 Reasons to Doubt North Korea's Satellite Story

According to NORAD, which inexplicably ignored its prime function of tracking Santa Claus in favor of monitoring missile launches, North Korea successfully orbited a satellite last night. Just eight months ago, a humiliatingly unsuccessful missile test left the 20-something North Korean leader Kim Jong-un claiming that this was the first time his rocket has failed to launch. Sure, buddy, happens to everyone.

But despite claims of success from North Korea and partial confirmation from NORAD, there are good reasons to be skeptical of just how successful last night's ballistic test was.

Read More »

The Best of North Korean News

Earlier in Juche 101 (that's 2012, for those not used to calendars that start with the birth of Eternal President of the Republic Kim Il-sung) the official newspaper of the Korean Workers Party inaugurated its English-language service. While we've been lost in the minutiae of U.S. politics, Rodong Sinmun — Korean for "Fair and Balanced," I think — has been indispensable for its coverage of politics, culture and the economy.

Still, some journalistic essentials like "facts" and "reality" are lost in the English pronouncements of Rodong Sinmun and the Korean Central News Agency, so additional translations have been provided.

Read More »

People's Daily Praises Kim Jong-un for Being The Onion's "Sexiest Man Alive"

Taking a story from The Onion at face value is not the craziest thing in the world. It happens to U.S. congressmen and Iranian news agencies with surprising frequency. What makes the Chinese People's Daily commitment to fake journalism truly extraordinary is that their 55-page spread on the "impeccable fashion sense, chic short hairstyle, and, of course, that famous smile" of North Korea's Kim Jong-un is still online as of this writing, a full three hours since Western media noticed the error.

Now there is the kind of commitment to propogandistic bullshit you want to see in your Communist Party newspaper. No mealy-mouthed pseudo-apologies, like those issued by the Iranian FARS after their Onion flub. Just stick to the damn story.

Besides, The Onion really did name Kim Jong Un its Sexiest Man Alive for 2012, making this the most factual reporting a Communist Party organ has published all week.

Tweet Untweet: Also Registered at Target (the West)

Sending a gift to Kim Jong Un and his bride? They're registered at Crate & Barrel, North Korea's state-run crate and barrel dispensary.

— mtobey (@mtobey) July 25, 2012