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  • Tennessee Revives Scopes Case with New "Monkey Bill"

    Tennessee state capitolRemember the Scopes Monkey trial? You know, that case from way back in the '20s where a school teacher was convicted of teaching evil monkey evolution science to the good Christian children of Tennessee?

    Tennessee sure hasn't forgotten

    Tennessee Gov. Bill Haslam (R) announced yesterday that he will "probably" sign a bill that attacks the teaching of "biological evolution, the chemical origins of life, global warming, and human cloning" by giving broad new legal immunities to teachers who question evolution and other widely accepted scientific theories…

    Although the bill is written to seem benign, as it neither specifically authorizes the teaching of creationism nor permits teachers to do more than criticize scientific theories "in an objective matter," the practical impact of this bill will be to intimidate all but the heartiest of school administrators against disciplining teachers who preach the most outlandish junk science in their classrooms.

    Democrats like to make fun of the GOP candidates for being stuck in the '50s, but at least they're in the post-WWII era. Tennessee is currently reliving the '20s, but without all those fun speakeasies and flapper dresses.

    Between this "monkey" law and the state's "Don't Say Gay" bill, the state is really not doing itself any favors. Ironically, although the "theory" of evolution is pretty much a scientific fact at this point, the people of Tennessee are themselves pretty strong evidence against evolution.


    Tags: Education, Evolution, Laws, Science & Technology, Tennessee
  • Mean Judge Forces FDA to Remove Delicious Antibiotics from Meat

    CowWhat's better than a tasty slab of USDA prime American beef? Nothing, except a slab of USDA prime American beef flavor-blasted with antibiotics.

    But now, thanks to a federal judge, the flavor party's over

    A federal judge on Thursday ordered regulators to start proceedings to withdraw approval for the use of common antibiotics in animal feed, citing concerns that overuse is endangering human health by creating antibiotic-resistant "superbugs."

    U.S. Magistrate Judge Theodore Katz ordered the U.S. Food and Drug Administration to begin proceedings unless makers of the drugs can produce evidence that their use is safe…

    The FDA had started such proceedings in 1977, prompted by its concerns the widespread use in livestock feed of certain antibiotics – particularly tetracyclines and penicillin, the most common. But the proceedings were never completed and the approval remained in place.

    According to the New York Times, the FDA never followed through on its initial decision to ban the use of antibiotics in animal feed due to pressure from Congress. Based on their expert knowledge of microbiology gleaned from years of studying law and campaigning for public office, congressmen didn't see the harm in destroying mankind's entire defense against disease.

    It's still unclear why politicians wanted to pump livestock full of drugs in the first place. Perhaps they thought Americans wouldn't eat infected meat. I guess they've never been to a fast food restaurant.

    Photo by Antoine Antoniol/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Agriculture, Animals, FDA, Food, Health, Judiciary, Laws
  • Pat Robertson, Pothead

    Pat RobertsonWhat does Pat Robertson have in common with Cheech and Chong, apart from a fondness for offensive racial stereotypes? Apparently, they all love pot.

    The televangelist doesn't use the stuff himself but he does support its legalization

     "I really believe we should treat marijuana the way we treat beverage alcohol," Mr. Robertson said in an interview on Wednesday. "I've never used marijuana and I don't intend to, but it's just one of those things that I think: this war on drugs just hasn't succeeded."

    Mr. Robertson's remarks echoed statements he made last week on "The 700 Club," the signature program of his Christian Broadcasting Network, and other comments he made in 2010.

    While those earlier remarks were largely dismissed by his followers, Mr. Robertson has now apparently fully embraced the idea of legalizing marijuana, arguing that it is a way to bring down soaring rates of incarceration and reduce the social and financial costs.

    It makes sense that a man who believes gay people caused Hurricane Katrina would endorse a mind-altering substance. He's already living in a delusional fantasyland. Why not let others join him?

    Let's face it, marijuana is probably the only thing that could make a Christian rock concert bearable. And just like a pothead, Pat Robertson would freak out during a planetarium laser show about the Big Bang.

    Fun fact: If you watch The 700 Club while high, it's like Robertson is actually coming out of the screen and calling you a sodomite.

    .

    Related: Pat Robertson Is Against Being Not Un-Against the Opposite of Un-Decriminalizing Pot

    Photo by Mario Tama/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Christianity, Drugs, Laws, Marijuana, Pat Robertson
  • Federal Judge Compares Interracial Marriage to Bestiality

    Judge Richard CebullWhile the judiciary tries to hold itself out as an impartial branch of government that floats high above the petty partisan fray of DC politics, everyone knows that's pretty much a load of BS.

    As Montana's chief U.S. district judge reminds us, sometimes those black-robed intellectuals forget to keep their political views, and bestiality fantasies, to themselves

    Montana's chief federal judge Wednesday admitted forwarding an email to friends about President Obama that appears to equate African Americans with dogs and raises questions about the president's mixed racial ancestry.

    "Normally I don't send or forward a lot of these, but even by my standards, it was a bit touching. I want all of my friends to feel what I felt when I read this. Hope it touches your heart like it did mine," Chief U.S. District Judge Richard Cebull wrote before forwarding the email…

    In the email, a boy asks his mother why he is black and she is white. "His mother replied, 'Don't even go there Barack! From what I can remember about that party, you're lucky you don't bark!' "

    The Bush-appointed judge later apologized, sort of

    Read More »


    Tags: Animals, Barack Obama, Judiciary, Laws, Montana, Racism, Richard Cebull, Stanley Ann Dunham
  • ACLU Bravely Fights for Freedom to Watch Internet Porn

    Republicans often paint the ACLU as some shadowy cabal of elite communists plotting to destroy the government and subvert traditional family values. But the ACLU does a lot of important work fighting for Americans' constitutional rights — free speech, free expression, free press.

    And now, free porn

    The American Civil Liberties Union is suing a Washington state library district for not offering access to online porn…The search censorship by the North Central Regional Library also means some websites — such as Google Images and YouTube — are blocked too. The board decided the filter serves its mission to promote reading and lifelong learning…

    The ACLU is representing three library users and a nonprofit organization, and argues that federally funded libraries should disable their filters upon the request of an adult.

    “This case is about an overly broad filtering policy that has restricted an adult student from using the Internet for a class assignment and a professional photographer from accessing art galleries online,” ACLU cooperating attorney Duncan Manville said in a statement.

    While the 2012 Republican candidates have yet to comment on the controversy, I think it's fair to assume that Mitt Romney would side with the ACLU. After all, he can't resist a money shot.

    If the case makes it all the way up to the Supreme Court, the justices would likely rule in favor of the ACLU and the porn industry. The liberal members of the bench have always stood firmly on the side of civil liberties. As for the right wing of the court, if there's one thing we've learned from Citizens United, it's that the conservative justices fully support whoring themselves out for cash.

    Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: ACLU, Citizens United v. FEC, Constitution, Education, Laws, Porn, Sex, Supreme Court