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Lisa Murkowski
  • Nancy Pelosi and Lisa Murkowski Get to Keep Their Jobs

    Despite a lot of hoopla and kerfuffle amongst pundits, it appears as though two of Congress' highest profile women have managed to successfully fend off rearguard attacks from men representing more conservative factions of their own parties.

    Nancy Pelosi will continue to lead the House Democrats in feckless futility

    Nancy Pelosi has been elected to lead House Democrats in the new Congress despite presiding over the loss of more than 60 House seats in the midterm elections. Pelosi ultimately had little trouble repelling the challenge from [North Carolina Rep. Heath] Shuler, one of the relatively-conservative Blue Dog Democrats who saw their numbers decimated in the midterms. The secret ballot vote was 150 for Pelosi to 43 for Shuler.

    And Lisa Murkowski will continue work with Senate Republicans to block all meaningful progress from occurring

    Sen. Lisa Murkowski has become the first Senate candidate in more than 50 years to win a write-in campaign. Ms. Murkowski emerged victorious after a painstaking, two-week count of write-in ballots showed she has overtaken tea party rival Joe Miller. Her victory became clear when Alaska election officials confirmed they had only about 700 votes left to count, putting Ms. Murkowski in safe territory to win re-election.

    This isn't just a good day for Pelosi and Murkowski. Nor just for women nationwide. It's good for all taxpayers in the country. Because the Senate just voted against a bill that would have made us have to pay these women the same amount as the dudes who were trying to take their jobs. Score!

    The Senate voted 58-41 against allowing debate on the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would help end discriminatory pay practices against women. It had already passed the House. More than 45 years after passage of the Equal Pay Act, the pay gap shockingly persists with women still earning on average 77 cents to every man's dollar…

    Not a single Republican supported the bill, including Sens. Olympia Snowe (R-ME) and Susan Collins (R-ME)… Sen. Ben Nelson (D-NE)… was the lone Democrat voting against the bill today. Sen. Lisa Murkowski (R-AK) was not present for the vote.

    Nice to know Murkowski will soon be back where she belongs, on the Senate floor, voting in lockstep with her party, teaching young women an important lesson. That women are just as adept at subjugating women as any man.


    Tags: Heath Shuler, House of Representatives, Joe Miller, Lisa Murkowski, Men and Women, Money, Nancy Pelosi, Senate
  • Lisa Murkowski Doesn't Support Sarah Palin for President, Partially Because They Hate Each Other, But Also Because Come On, Are You Kidding Me?

    Look, obviously, everybody knows that there is no love lost between the Murgelsky family and the Palin family. They've been Hatfield-and-McCoying it up each other since time immemorial. Or at least since newly-elected-Governor Frank Murphelsby passed over Sarah Palin as his choice to replace him in the U.S. Senate and instead chose his daughter Lisa Murtlestein. Since then, Palin has gone on to unseat Frank Mittleski as governor and attempt to replace Lisa Murplesglee in the Senate with Joe Miller. This is unconfirmed, but I have it on good authority that they do not swap Christmas cards.

    Be that as it may, does a profound dislike of another person necessarily discount a pretty right-on argument against that person's qualifications for a kind of important job? If a tree falls in the the middle of the woods and no one is around to hear it, does that mean that Sarah Palin would make a truly awful president?

    "I just do not think that she has those leadership qualities, that intellectual curiosity that allows for building good and great policies. she was my governor for two years, for just about two years there, and I don't think that she enjoyed governing. I don't think she liked to get down into the policy. I want somebody who goes to bed at night and wakes up in the morning thinking about how we are going to deal with our national security issues, how we are going to deal with our economy…"

    Of course, there's an implied "Oh, and also, fuck her."


    Tags: Alaska, Frank Murkowski, Lisa Murkowski, Sarah Palin
  • Potential Tickets in the 2012 Presidential Race

    Well, it's been nearly two whole weeks since the Midterm elections, so you know what that means don't you?! It means we're officially entering into the 2012 presidential election season. (Technically speaking, we entered that about seven months ago, but now we don't have any other distractions.)

    So, let's not waste any more time not speculating on who'll be running in opposition to Barack Obama and Joe Biden. Let's start speculating on who'll be running in opposition to Barack Obama and Joe Biden!

    Some people think that it should be Paul instead of Paul at the top of the ticket, but those people are obviously idiots.

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    Obviously, this is just a stepping stone to Jar-Fetus Bush 2020.

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    More speculation after the jump…

    Read More »


    Tags: Christine O’Donnell, Hillary Clinton, Jeb Bush, Lisa Murkowski, Michele Bachmann, Rand Paul, Ron Paul, Sarah Palin
  • Joe Miller's Lawsuit Against Improper Spelling

    Senatorial candidate Joe Miller — who is currently trailing Alaska's write-in candidates by 11,333 — is hoping to sue his way into beating incumbent Sen. Lisa Merkowitzky, demanding that the state throw out all votes for her that fail to spell her correctly

    Miller is asking a judge to stop the state from making a judgment on a voter's intentions if the voter wrote in something other than "Murkowski" or "Lisa Murkowski." State law allows no leeway for other spellings, his lawsuit says…

    The Murkowski campaign reacted to Tuesday's lawsuit by accusing Miller of trying to toss out legitimate votes for the eight-year incumbent. "They're trying to discount as many votes as possible from Alaskans," Murkowski campaign manager Kevin Sweeney said.

    Let's say he achieves his goal, forces a court decision and beats Murquelskvi. Is that really the way he wants to win? Will a victory by lawsuit fit in with his narrative as a breath of fresh Alaskan air in the stale halls of D.C. he's been fostering?

    And, also, couldn't possibly hurt Miller amongst voters who lack the mental acuity needed for reading and writing? I mean, aren't those people his base?


    Tags: Alaska, Joe Miller, Lisa Murkowski, Senate
  • Spider-Man Emerges as Possible Dark Horse Winner in Alaska Senate Race

    Stephen Colbert digs down into this clusterfudge* of a three-way senate race they've got going on up there at the top of the world, and uncovers a fourth candidate. One with a secret identity. One that you'll never guess (unless you read the title of this post)…



    The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

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    * Mmmmmmmm… clusterfudge


    Tags: Alaska, Joe Miller, Lisa Murkowski, Scott McAdams, Senate, Spider-Man, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Video