Madeleine Albright Blog Posts | Comedy Central Indecision

Six American Politicians Who Were Born as Un-Americans

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Mar 2, 2010 04:24 PM by Gladstone | Comments:

The other day my editor said something to me that made me think of some of the people born in other countries who later became U.S. Politicians. I think it was something like, "Hey, Gladstone, write me up a list of people born in other countries who are now U.S. politicians."

So I set to work without even asking why she made the request. And believe me that was no small task. After all, with the upcoming premiere of Ugly Americans –- a show about monsters who become American citizens — I could hardly concentrate on this article about legal aliens who became American politicians. Also, I've been very busy lately attending therapy for people who accidentally make highly insulting analogies without meaning to.

So without further ado…

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Jamshid "Jimmy" Delshad

It's no small thing to come from Iran — a country currently despised in the U.S. — and get yourself elected Mayor of Beverley Hills, but that's just what Jamshid Delshad did in 2007. How?

First, he told people he's from Persia and not Iran. That conjures images of flying carpets instead of unapproved nuclear weapons programs. Second, as a Persian Jew, Delshad didn't really have a lot in common with Iran's current Muslim-based government. But most importantly, Delshad, unofficially changed his name to "Jimmy." And as anyone will tell you, Americans love politicians named "Jimmy," and we would never elect someone with a name like Barack Hussein Obama.

On second thought, it was probably just the Persia thing.

Ugly Americans premieres on Wednesday, March 17 at 10:30 pm / 9:30 c after an all new South Park.

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President Obama's Popularity Surging Amongst People Who Can't Vote for Him

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Sep 1, 2009 11:13 AM by Dennis DiClaudio | Comments:

Even more of that even more proof that Barack Obama is an un-American, Muslim anti-American and this time it involves more than just words people say. There's good ol' patriotic math involved…

A Pew Research Poll released today shows that the image of the United States has "improved markedly in most parts of the world," largely because of the high levels of global confidence and trust in Obama. Improvements were especially high in Western Europe, but attitudes toward America also warmed in Canada, Mexico, Argentina and urban populations in Brazil, India and China. Nearly 27,000 interviews were conducted in 24 nations, as well as the Palestinian territories.

"His personal popularity and new respect for the U.S. having elected him translates positively for the U.S. image," former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright said…

Hmmm… Bet you can't guess the one country in which, according to Pew, Obama's presence hasn't been having quite as much of a positive effect recently.

On second thought, I'll bet you can.

Tags: Barack Obama, International Affairs, Madeleine Albright, Polls

Grill, Grill or Grill: Women Secretaries of State

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May 25, 2009 12:00 PM by TheInDecider | Comments:

Today — on this patriotic holiday — we have charged ourselves with choosing from amongst three women Secretaries of State: Hillary Clinton, Condoleezza Rice and Madeline Albright, and must choose whom we'd most like to to Grill (barbecue with), Grill (conduct a comprehensive interview with) and Grill (cover their teeth with some phat gold teeth).

Grill – Hillary Clinton

After years of being married to Bill Clinton and serving in the male-dominated U.S. Senate, it pretty much goes without saying that she knows how to deal with greasy wieners.

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Sarah Palin's Triple Venti White Chocolate Mocha No Whip Extra Foam With a Dollop of Madeleine Albright

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Oct 6, 2008 10:39 AM by Mary Phillips-Sandy | Comments:

Add Starbucks cups to the list of "any and all" media Sarah Palin reads to keep herself informed and in a fightin' mood.

This weekend she told a California rally that the quotation on her mocha had come along at just the right time, like a little wink from God…

One teensy fly in the providential ointment: Madeleine Albright (and therefore the Starbucks cup) never said, "There's a special place in hell for women who don't support other women."

Madeleine Albright said, "There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women," and now she's telling reporters that her remark had nothing to do with politics.

How disgraceful, to see a former secretary of state resorting to gotcha self-quoting.

Tags: Madeleine Albright, Sarah Palin