The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30/10:30c.
Tags: Food, Mexico, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Video
Here's an interesting statistic that doesn't get nearly enough play in the lamestream media: 97 percent of all people with whom you currently disagree politically were actually born on foreign soil.
Granted, there's no technical "truth" to that statistic, but that doesn't make it any less valid…
Undeterred by documentary evidence and repeated judicial rejection, a group of conspiracy theorists who say President Obama was born in Africa have sued the California secretary of state to demand that she verify the eligibility of all presidential candidates before putting them on the November ballot…
The lawsuit filed by Republican primary write-in candidate John Albert Dummett Jr., Markham Robinson of the American Independent Party of California and five others also alludes to "questions concerning the eligibility" of Mitt Romney to vie for the role of commander in chief. The birthers' lawyer, Gary Kreep of Ramona, said Wednesday that his clients wanted the issue of Romney's eligibility raised because of his parents' long residency in Mexico.
Ugh! I knew there was something vaguely "Mexican" about that guy.
And, by "Mexican," I mean that we hold not completely similar opinions about how the U.S. Constitution should be read.
You know, "Mexican."
Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Barack Obama, Birthers, California, Judiciary, Mexico, Mitt Romney
Real-life Church Lady Rick Santorum has a lot of opinions about what girls should and shouldn't do. They shouldn't have sex or take birth control and should be home-schooled.
And of course, they shouldn't go to Mexico for spring break…
On Tuesday"s Glenn Beck program, Rick Santorum responded to the news that the president allowed his 13-year-old daughter, Malia, to vacation in Mexico, despite a recent State Department travel warning for the country. According to Santorum, the president should be leading by example.
"What I would say is that the president's actions should reflect what his administration is saying," Santorum told Beck. "If the administration is saying that it"s not safe to have people down there, then just because you can send 25 Secret Service agents doesn"t mean you should do it. You should set an example."
Rick Santorum is just afraid that something dangerous could happen to Americans on vacation in the Spanish-speaking Americas, like learning to speak Spanish.
Or getting photographed without a shirt on.
Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Hispanic, Malia Obama, Mexico, Rick Santorum, Vacation
Hey! What's up with those Mexicans taking our Gulf of America, huh? It's bad enough they stealing all our good hotel and restaurant jobs. They need to take our bodies of water, too?
Thank God we have legislators like Democratic Mississippi State Rep. Steve Holland — not to be confused with '80s filmmaker Savage Steve Holland — out there, fighting the good fight against this Latino oppression. And, by "good," I mean American…
This week, Holland introduced H.B. 150 to Mississippi's House of Representatives Marine Resources Committee — a bill that, in summary, would "for all official purposes" rename the Gulf of Mexico (or "body of water south of Mississippi") the "Gulf of America."
"For all official purposes within the State of Mississippi, the body of water that is located directly south of Hancock, Harrison and Jackson Counties shall be known as the "Gulf of America."… This act shall take effect and be in force from and after July 1, 2012."
Oh, I can't wait for this to go into effect! I can't tell you how much safer I'll feel swimming in a non-Mexican gulf. I'll finally be able to bring my wallet in there with me.
Next up: Going after Italy and their strangle hold on American water ice. Then: Taking American cream cheese back from those swarthy Philadelphians.
Tags: Gulf of Mexico, Mexico, Mississippi, State Legislature
* Looks like Barack Obama may have received donations from a people who turned out to be refugees hiding in Mexico. If I were Mitt Romney, I'd be really mad at my family.
* Michael Steele does not "appreciate" gay marriage being compared to interracial marriage. Political leaders these days, they don't "appreciate" anything.
* Bill O'Reilly: "The bigotry against pro-life people is I think way more than the bigotry against gay people." He may be right; even reason seems to be in opposition to his people.
Photo by Olivier Douliery-Pool/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Abortion, Barack Obama, Bill O'Reilly, California, Crime, Fox News, Judiciary, LGBT, Marriage Equality, Mexico, Michael Steele, Money, Proposition 8