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Minnesota
  • Democratic Lawmaker Caught with Pants Down at Rest Stop

    Kerry Gauthier is a first-term Minnesota state representative  from Duluth who advertised on Craigslist for a "no strings attached" encounter. After he admitted to having oral sex with a 17-year-old boy in the bushes of a truck stop, police declined to bring charges because the boy was older than 16, Minnesota's  age of consent, and no money was exchanged. Ho-hum.

    What makes this story different from the usual man blows boy story? For once, the lawmaker is a Democrat

    A Minnesota Democrat who had a rest-stop sexual encounter with a 17-year-old boy dropped his re-election bid Wednesday, hours after declaring he would stay in the race in defiance of party leaders who wanted him out as they fight to regain control of the state Legislature.

    Rep. Kerry Gauthier, 56, told The Associated Press the decision was his own after multiple conversations with Democratic leaders pressing him to withdraw. He said he had been going back and forth about running "every 20 minutes for a week."

    C'mon universe, where is the homophobic, family-values hypocrisy angle that makes these stories more than merely sad? Where does the news cycle get off leaving us without a cautionary tale of self-hating projection?

    The Rev. Grant Storms, the former "Christian patriot" pastor whose marches against homosexuality at New Orleans' Southern Decadence festival briefly put him in the national spotlight, was convicted of obscenity Wednesday, for exposing himself while masturbating at Lafreniere Park last year. In his confession, he described public masturbation as "a thrill," but authorities debunked suspicions that he was a pedophile.

    Oh, there we go. It gets off at a children's playground.


    Tags: Louisiana, Minnesota, Sex, State Legislature
  • MN Republicans Reveal Plan to Make Michele Bachmann Seem Normal

    Michele Bachmann suspends her campaignAs part of an ingenious effort to give Michele Bachmann the appearance of a sensible human being, Republican primary voters in Minnesota's first congressional district have nominated Allen Quist to face off against incumbent Democrat Tim Walz.

    A former state representative, Quist spent his legislative career crusading against sodomy — once comparing a university gay counseling clinic to the Ku Klux Klan — and generally saying things that made people wonder how he ever made it to campaign events on time, considering he was travelling all the way from 1490s Spain…

    He called for mandatory AIDS testing as a prerequisite for obtaining a marriage license. And more than a decade before it emerged as a national issue, he campaigned against the advent of same-sex marriage in the Minnesota, running ads in which a priest marries two men, "Mike" and "Steve," and pronounces them "man and man."

    In one memorable interview, Quist told a Minnesota reporter he believed women were "genetically predisposed" to be subservient to men, pointing to, among other things, the behavior of wild animals.

    The alliance with Bachmann arose when the two joined forces to fight Minnesota's state education standards. In order to counteract the "left-wing education agenda," Quist has developed an online curriculum consisting of modules called C-Mods, which are "designed to supplement and/or correct current textbooks."

    And for shame, if your response to this is to ask if he's one of those education reformers who thinks the Loch Ness monster is real and The Flintstones was a nature documentary. Shame on you for even asking. Of course he's one of those people…

    Read More »


    Tags: Allen Quist, Education, Evolution, Michele Bachmann, Minnesota
  • The Unconvention: A Soundbite-Free Evening of Political Talk

    It is early September of the year 2012. The bloody and brutal Republican and Democratic national conventions have finally (mercifully) come to an end. After two solid weeks of unrelenting partisan mudslinging and terrible speech-giving, a battered and bewildered American people wander aimlessly through the smoldering remains of the political landscape, searching for some small salve. Something to restore their faith in democracy.

    Luckily for them, on September 9th, Indecision is teaming up with 92Y’s Campaign for the American Conversation to present The Unconvention, a night in which people from all gradients of the political spectrum will come together for a night of bickerless political conversation and humor.

    Performers and speakers that night include former governor and senator from Indiana Evan Bayh, Buzzfeed Editor-in-Chief Ben Smith, former RNC chair Michael Steele, MSNBC host Dylan Ratigan and 17-year-old reformed conservative partisan Jonathan Krohn.

    Buy your tickets now!


    Tags: Ben Smith, BuzzFeed, Dylan Ratigan, Evan Bayh, Indiana, Jesse Ventura, Michael Steele, Minnesota, Republican National Convention, Senate, The Unconvention
  • Quote Unquote: The Reagan Wit

    Ronald Reagan — after winning 49 states in the 1984 presidential election – on what he'd like for Christmas

    .

    "Well, Minnesota would have been nice."

    .

    Say… I remember when Republican presidential candidates new how to talk. Also, I remember rotary phones.

    (via Reddit)


    Tags: 1984, Minnesota, Ronald Reagan
  • One of a Kind Candidate: Greg and Bobbie Gallas, School Board, Rochester, MN

    Let's just go straight to Rochester, Minnesota's Post-Bulletin, since they are doing a fine job at the jokey blog post thing:

    You've heard the story before. Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy and girl get married, have children and then run for and win seats on the Rochester School Board.

    The newspaper does not lie. Greg and Bobbie Gallas are both running for seats on the Rochester, MN school board. Not the same seat, that would make them weird, passive-aggressive marital monsters. They're just normal Minnesotans campaigning as a couple to take over almost a third of the local school board. However, Minnesotans pride themselves on being Minnesota Nice, but which is actually passive-aggressive–bordering on sociopathic–behavior. Kill them with kindness, if kindness is arsenic-laced Tater Tot hotdish.

    "We're not going to fight that we're not husband and wife because we are," a Gallas (who knows which one) told the Post-Bulletin. You see what I mean? Passive and respectful and honest. WHAT DARK SECRETS DO YOU HIDE, MINNESOTA?

    Also, it turns out there are other candidate couples. Romance in America is approving agenda minutes every other Tuesday at the municipal center, capped by a fundraising fish fry. Meanwhile, back in Rochester, the Gallases share a campaign website and will share campaign staff (their kids, maybe?), but they have separate donation tabs on their website. That's going to be awkward. We all see that, right?

    Photo via Greg Gallas' Facebook page

    Previously: Reggie Joule, "Big blanket candidate"

    Our friends at Dr Pepper are going to send Mr. and Mrs. Gallas a one-of-a-kind t-shirt, and you get to choose its slogan:

    Want a custom t-shirt of your own? Of course you do! Head to DrPepper.com and get started.


    Tags: Minnesota, One of a Kind Candidates