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National Review
  • Herman Cain's Creepiness Leaves No Woman Behind

    When information surfaced that the National Restaurant Association settled two sexual harassment complaints registered against Herman Cain, reaction from Cain allies was swift and certain. Where was the pizza stained dress? If the sauce isn't spilt', you must acquit, cried National Review's resident pervert John Derbyshire

    Is there anyone who thinks sexual harassment is a real thing? Is there anyone who doesn't know it's all a lawyers' ramp, like 'racial discrimination'? You pay a girl a compliment nowadays, she runs off and gets lawyered up. Is this any way to live?

    Perhaps the creepy old man is right. How can we trust allegations made 11-14 years ago, when Cain was neither rich nor famous, which were actually settled by the NRA for considerable sums of money? Real social conservatives, like Bill Bennett,  know that for sexual harassment allegations to be taken seriously, they have to follow the rule of four

    Four women are not an insignificant number. One or two anonymous charges, perhaps. Three anonymous charges (where, as I understand the story, Cain knows of at least two of the women) plus one woman who went very public and opened herself up to all manner of investigation are a lot. It is no longer insignificant.

    And if four charges — including an accusation of sexual assault — are "no longer insignificant," what happens when a fifth woman steps forward to accuse Cain of inappropriate behavior, noting that Cain asked her to set up a date between himself and a young woman who attended a speech delivered by Cain in Egypt nine years ago?

    [Donna] Donella, who no longer works for [the United States Agency for International Development], said they were suspicious of Cain's motives and declined to set up the date. Cain responded, "Then you and I can have dinner." That's when two female colleagues intervened and suggested they all go to dinner together, Donella said.

    Cain exhibited no inappropriate sexual behavior during the dinner, though he did order two $400 bottles of wine and stuck the women with the bill, she said.

    After woman number five, I'm 9-9-point-9 percent certain that at the very least, Cain is a cheap creepy man.

    Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Bill Bennett, Herman Cain, John Derbyshire, National Review, Primaries, Republicans, Scandalgate
  • Rick Perry's Problem Apparently Was That He Was Way Too Sober

    As Ilya noted briefly earlier today, Rick Perry — who's been sliding further and further down in the polls since he made the possibly unwise decision to start talking — decided on Friday to forgo many the normal tropes of presidential campaign speeches: seriousness, solemnity, sobriety.

    The good folks over on MSNBC's Morning Joe seemed duly confused by the Texas governor's comical mugging and bizarre behaviors. All except for the National Review's Robert Costa, who saw in this Perry something populist, something presidential, something spin-worthy…

    It's fun to watch Costa squirm as everyone around the table makes not very veiled jokes about whatever "cocktail" Perry's on, but here's the most important nugget from the clip…

    "I had two thoughts after watching that clip. One, it reminded me of Will Ferrel doing George W. Bush on Saturday Night Live. But, two, this is the Rick Perry who I saw in Waterloo, Iowa when he entered this race: athletic, energetic, connecting with voters. It's a little probably too humorous to continue at this level, but Rick Perry, if he can continue to have this kind of energy, he could connect in Iowa and see some momentum. Because this is the Perry that did connect in Texas and that could connect in the early primary states. We haven't seen it in his stiff personal throughout these debates."

    Aha! So, all that the Perry campaign needs to do to right this upending campaign vessel is invest in, I don't know, a half dozen or so crates of Johnny Walker Black.

    And maybe a couple vials of Vicodin.

    Tags: Alcohol, Joe Scarborough, Morning Joe, MSNBC, National Review, New Hampshire, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry
  • Stephen Colbert Can't Decide on Who Will Be the Next Republican President

    Mitt Romney seems like an obvious choice behind which Colbert should throw the support of his new PAC, but he's got this one major flaw. He's Mitt Romney…

    Coverage continues with the National Review's Rick Brookhiser after the jump.

    The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30/10:30c.

    Read More »

    Tags: Colbert Super PAC, Jeb Bush, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, National Review, Polls, Primaries, Republicans, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Video
  • Karl Rove Spins Out of Control, Likens Conservatives to Fecal Matter

    Pretend you didn't read the headline of this post and guess who said the following:

    "No president, not even Ronald Reagan, will get a perfect score on a purity test once in office. Reagan, after all, raised taxes by what at the time was a record amount and signed an immigration-amnesty bill," said [REDACTED].

    Michael Moore? Susan Sarandon? "Daily Kos," whoever that is? Wrong, it's Karl Rove, speaking to the National Review. You remember Karl Rove. Small guy with a potato-shaped head. Arch-wizard of conservative propaganda. What he's doing here is spinning as only Karl Rove can spin –  his very next sentence was:

    "And President Reagan still belongs on Mount Rushmore. You take a statesman in the totality of his actions."

    See? That crafty genius is building an Ark of Hypocrisy for Republicans to climb aboard whenever the hot water starts rising. For it before you were against it? Against it before you were for it? It's okay! Details don't matter, only the totality of your actions, and you get to keep adding long after you're dead/out of office, whichever happens (or is noticed) first.

    He hasn't worked in the White House for over a year, but Rove hasn't lost his edge…

    Rove also said though that the reaction from movement conservatives is sometimes difficult to gauge from the White House.

    "Conservatives are a frothy mix," Rove said.

    Um, a frothy mix?

    If this is part of an elaborate reverse-psychology conservative media strategy, I cannot wait to see what's next… a Michele Bachmann campaign video in which she barbecues the Constitution while listening to Joan Baez, maybe?

    Tags: Conservatives, Karl Rove, National Review, Rick Santorum
  • Terrifying New Birther Theory May Cancel Out the Declaration of Independence

    And you thought the birther movement was over, when even the editors of the National Review spoke out against it. Hahahaha! Come on, everyone speaks in haste sometimes…

    The overwhelming evidence is that Obama was born an American citizen on Aug. 4, 1961, which almost certainly makes him constitutionally eligible to hold his office. I say "almost certainly" because Obama, as we shall see, presents complex dual-citizenship issues. For now, let's just stick with what's indisputable: He was also born a Kenyan citizen. In theory, that could raise a question about whether he qualifies as a "natural born" American — an uncharted constitutional concept.

    Good grief, I could drive a truck through the holes in Barack Obama's citizenship status. Or should I say… a lorry?

    If the forty-fourth president was indeed, as the "birthers" aver, born in Kenya in 1961, he would have been born a British subject. Perhaps his entire career is a clever scheme to bring the colonists' rebellion to an end and revoke the Declaration of Independence.

    All right, that's it. Are we going to let Lord Barack Husseinington Obamawell sell us back to his Queen, so she can turn us into indentured corgi-walkers? No! We must stand up to this crumpet-loving "president." A tea party? No, no, we need something stronger. Something that will send a cold, frosty chill down the imposter's spine.

    Like dumping cases of beer in the Potomac.

    Tags: Alcohol, Barack Obama, Birthers, National Review, United Kingdom