The Western Republican Debate/Brawl Winners and Losers

In an exciting development for the struggling producers of such American classics as Thunderbird, Cisco and Wild Irish Rose, the Republican presidential candidates held their ninth debate in Las Vegas, Nevada, a city suffering from some of the highest unemployment and foreclosure rates in the country. The winners and losers, in gloriously objective alphabetical order…

The Losers:

Michele Bachmann said this: "The president, he put us in Libya. He is now putting us in Africa. We already were stretched too thin, and he put our special operations forces in Africa." But can she see Uganda, where the U.S. has deployed 100 special forces operatives, from her house?

Herman Cain was attacked from all sides…

The first to feel the assault was the front-runner of the moment, Herman Cain, who is struggling to prove that he is a serious contender and not merely another evanescent phenom of this election season. He was thrown on the defense by new criticism of his signature '9-9-9' tax overhaul plan, which an independent analysis released shortly before the debate indicated would be a boon to the wealthy and put a significantly heavier burden on lower- and middle-income Americans.

Cain defended his proposal by pointing to an analysis conducted by Fiscal Associates, Inc. of Virginia, a firm directed by a longtime supporter of a national sales tax. The 10-page analysis is emblazoned with the word "draft" and doesn't include a single distributional table, so…you know can trust it.

Newt Gingrich won the debate according to some lady named Sarah Palin. Did not win the debate according to those of us who inhabit reality.

Ron Paul made a serious points about the costs of American empire. Unfortunately, had to make those points in conversation with Rick Santorum, which is enough to ruin anyone's day.

"Rick Perry ate his wheaties. Unfortunately, he mixed them with Nonsense Juice." – Dave Weigel, and 'roids, definitely some steroids.

Mitt Romney is still showing too much evidence of being a somewhat competent technocrat to secure the nomination.

Rick Santorum is still invited to these things?

And the Winners:

Gary Johnson. Gary Johnson won.

Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Tags: CNN, Debates, Gary Johnson, Herman Cain, Las Vegas, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Nevada, Newt Gingrich, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul

LiveBlog: Lucky Number Ninth Republican Debate from Las Vegas

9:53 – So, what do you think? Lots of blood on the mat, but I'm not sure whose it is. Well, clearly a lot of it is Perry's. But I think Cain and Romney were pretty gashed as well. And how about Santorum. He came with a really sharp sword.

What do you think? Who won? Or, who lost the least?

9:52 – It's over? Where's this cake that Bachmann promised?

9:51 – Michele Bachmann: "I am the most different candidate from Barack Obama than anyone on this stage." Well put.

9:50 – Santorum is currently polling #3 behind Romney and Perry in Pennsylvania.

9:45 - @TheInDecider: "Rick Santorum: 'I'm gonna be the president of Pennsylvania, just you wait and see!'#CNNDebate"

Read More »

Tags: CNN, Debates, Herman Cain, Las Vegas, Liveblog, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Nevada, Newt Gingrich, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum

LiveBlogging the #CNNDebate in Las Vegas, Tonight @ 8/7c

As a great American once said, you gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to suggest electrocuting Mexican immigrants. Join us here and @TheInDecider tonight at 8/7c for live coverage of the GOP #CNNDebate in Las Vegas.

In the lineup: Mitt Romney, Herman Cain, Rick Perry, Ron Paul, Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, the ghost of Ronald Reagan.

Not in the lineup: Jon Huntsman (boycotting), Gary Johnson (against the rules), Buddy Roemer (what's he up to, anyway?), Fred Karger (probably also against the rules), rational explanations of workable policies.

See you tonight!

Photo by Bruce Bennett/Getty Images

Tags: Buddy Roemer, Debates, Fred Karger, Gary Johnson, Herman Cain, Jon Huntsman, Las Vegas, Liveblog, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Nevada, Newt Gingrich, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul

Ron Paul Proposes Bold, Principled and Insane Economic Plan

Never one to abandon ideological consistency in the face of external reality, yesterday Ron Paul released a specific, internally consistent, audacious…and absolutely crazy fiscal reform proposal titled a "A Plan to Restore America." In short, Ron Paul is still Ron Paul.

Paul announced his plan in Las Vegas, Nevada, an apt symbol for the economic future young adults can expect to face in Paultopia, which would allow workers to opt-out of the Social Security and Medicare systems in favor of personal investment/dancing for change before their Galtian Overlords. Other key aspects of the plan, which would cut approximately $1 trillion in federal spending in the first year of the Awakening of the Elves Ron Paul's presidency (actually, both time-lines are equally plausible), include…

* Ending all funding for wars and foreign assistance.

* Eliminating five cabinet departments: Energy, Housing and Urban Development, Commerce, Interior, and Education. Paul would also eliminate the Transportation Security Administration and privatize the Federal Aviation Administration. These measures are part of an effort to "[slam] on the brakes and puts America on a return to constitutional government." Because if James Madison had wanted the federal government to regulate magickal flying machines from the future, he would have put the FAA in the Constitution, somewhere between the three fifths compromise and the power of Congress to "grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal."

* Converting the Medicaid program into block-grants distributed to states, because if you can't trust the State of Alabama to adequately fund healthcare services for the poor, who can you trust?

As for the likely impact of the proposal, Paul was sanguine…

"I have a personal conviction that this will not hurt anybody. You cut government spending and it goes back to you," he promised a crowd of roughly 200 supporters who gathered in a conference room at the Venetian hotel to hear him unveil the plan.

Yep, I'm sure phrases like "Supplemental nutrition for women, children, etc – discontinued" won't have an impact on anybody important, if implemented. I mean if Rush Limbaugh is okay with it…

Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Tags: Constitution, Economy, Medicaid, Nevada, Primaries, Ron Paul, Social Security, Taxes

From the Pork Barrel: Here Comes the GOP Jobs Plan

* The Senate GOP's plan for employment and economic recovery is expected to be very effective, except in regards to employment, economy and recovery.

* Jon Huntsman's been doing so poorly lately that his campaign has started taking in anti-dollars.

* Herman Cain becomes first candidate (who matters) to drop out of next week's Nevada debate.

* 99% + 1% = this.

Tags: Debates, Economy, Herman Cain, Jon Huntsman, Money, Nevada, Occupy Wall Street, Pork Barrel, Primaries, Republicans, Senate, Unemployment