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New York
  • Rick Santorum Nightmare Dog Wedding Comes True

    It featured a black-tie gala, couture gowns, celebrity chefs and officiating by Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.

    In short, it was everything Rick Santorum warned us about

    Two dogs got married Thursday night at an extravaganza to benefit the Humane Society of New York…

    After they got hitched, the cuddly couple were presented with a Guinness World Record in the category of most expensive pet wedding at $158,187.26. The luxury goods and services that went into the wedding were all donated. Guests bought tickets for the Manhattan fundraiser.

    As it happens, while the bride hailed from New York, the groom was from Richmond, Virginia, a state that bans marriage equality via a constitutional amendment. Which raises the obvious slippery-slope argument. If dogs can have a fake wedding, what's next? Two consenting adults who love each other being allowed to marry for real?

    Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Animals, LGBT, New York, Rick Santorum, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, Virginia
  • Mitt Romney's Hamptons Fundraiser vs. The Great Gatsby

    The Great Gatsby and Mitt Romney's fundraisers in the Hamptons, which included an event at the estate of Julia and David Koch in Southampton, New York, where the suggested contribution was $75,000 per couple.

    One of these is an extended metaphor on cynicism, greed and the destruction of the American Dream amid an orgy of material excess. The other is a book we force upon high school freshmen.

    Identify each quote's provenance as coming from East Hampton or the West Egg of F. Scott Fitzgerald's novel…

    1. "A woman in a blue chiffon dress poked her head out…'Is there a V.I.P. entrance? We are V.I.P.'

    2. "I like to come," [the woman said]. "I never care what I do, so I always have a good time. When I was here last I tore my gown on a chair, and he asked me my name and address — inside of a week I got a package from Croirier's with a new evening gown in it."

    3. "I've been everywhere and done everything."

    4. "Tell them who's on your yacht this weekend! Tell him!"

    Read More »

    Tags: Books, David Koch, Fundraising, Games and Challenges, Mitt Romney, Money, New York
  • Quote Unquote: The Death of Death

    Chris Collins — candidate for New York's 27th district – on the miracles of modern medicine


    "People now don't die from prostate cancer, breast cancer and some of the other things."


    Oh, did we figure those out?! That must have happened on one of my days off! All right! Go humanity! Man, those cancer things were a bitch, weren't they. Last I heard, they were killing tens of thousands of people a year. So, needless to say, I'm pretty happy with this new development.

    Now, if we can only cure getting hit by a semi truck while walking drunkenly across the interstate, we'll be home free.

    Tags: Health, Health Care, House of Representatives, New York, Quote Unquote
  • State Senator Marty Golden Will Teach You How to Be a Lady

    Republican New York State Senator Marty Golden knows it's tough out there, ladies.

    In 2009 the median income of full time, year-round workers was $47,127 for men, compared to only $36,278 for women. Stingy family leave policies and lack of subsidized day care often make it difficult for women to advance in the office. Sexual harassment is still a constant concern in many workplaces.

    Luckily, Golden has the answer

    Later this month, Republican State Sen. Marty Golden's office is holding a career-development event for women in his southern Brooklyn district teaching them "Posture, Deportment and the Feminine Presence."

    That's according to a taxpayer-funded mailing being sent out in Golden's district, which an offended reader passed along. The taxpayer-funded event — presented by a "certified protocol consultant" — is part of a series teaching women in Brooklyn "what's new in the 21st century as it relates to business etiquette and social protocol." More details are also available on Golden's Senate website, including the fact that women in attendance will be taught to, "Sit, stand and walk like a model," how to, "Walk up and down a stair elegantly" and "Differences in American and Continental rules governing handshakes and introductions."

    If nothing else, these kinds of workshops are a way for the New York GOP to demonstrate a commitment to women's issues and simultaneously promote fiscal discipline.

    Job training programs proving expensive and ineffective? Replace them with seminars on lady-like behavior.

    New York state having trouble meeting renewable energy targets? Golden's "It's more fun to cook barefoot!" seminar will help save millions on air conditioning bills.

    Is the SUNY higher education budget threatening to grow out of control? Just replace tuition assistance with a series of Golden-hosted events on "Earning your M.R.S. degree."

    Photo by Slavin Vlasic/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

    Tags: Men and Women, New York, State Legislature
  • Our Endorsements: Here's a Clown Answer, BRO!

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    * Clowning Harry Reid.

    * What's next, JFK: Skirt Hunter?

    * What happens to NYC when President Obama pays a visit.

    * Justin Beiber plays it safe on the fence with David Letterman.

    * Mommy skills count when applying for a job, from McSweeney's.

    * Winter is coming. Game of Thrones political attack ads from Mother Jones.

    * Just when you thought it was safe to wade into the ocean of politics again…the Tea Party.

    Tags: Barack Obama, Daily Links, David Letterman, Game of Thrones, John Kennedy, Mitt Romney, Mother Jones, New York, Tea Party, The Onion, Unemployment, Women's Rights