Jon Stewart Ties Rupert Murdoch to Terrorism

On last night's Daily Show, in response to flimsy attempts by the Fox News gang to link the Imam behind the so-called Ground Zero Mosque to terrorism, Jon Stewart used the same tactics to connect Rupert Murdoch to Osama bin Laden. Meanwhile, bin Laden was in Fahrenheit 9/11 with Michael Moore, who was in Canadian Bacon with John Candy, who was in JFK with Kevin Bacon!

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

Tags: 9/11, Dick Morris, Fox, Islam, Jon Stewart, Laura Ingraham, New York City, NRA, Osama bin Laden, Rudy Giuliani, Rupert Murdoch, Steve Doocy, The Daily Show, Video

From the Pork Barrel: The Eternal Yaf and Yang of Conservativism

* Awesome new conservative group a full vowel and consonant away from deviant sexual behavior. So much improvement, guys!

* Democrats take a page out of Republican playbook this election cycle: Run on FEAR (of Republicans)!

* Nevada primary election decided with card game instead of standard racism.

* HealthCare.gov loves Diddy, vodka.

* NRA is supposedly maybe going to endorse Harry Reid over Sharron "I Have the 2nd Amendment Tattooed on The Inside of My Eyelids" Angle.

* The Onion: Restoration of 'Star Spangled Banner' Uncovers Horrifying New Verses

* Somebody over at Slate is a real fucking killjoy.

Tags: 4th of July, Conservatives, Democrats, Guns, Harry Reid, NRA, Pork Barrel, Republicans, Second Amendment, Senate, Sex, Sharron Angle

Pamela Gorman Will Shoot Taxes in the Face

Pamela Gorman sure is "gunning" for the GOP nomination for Arizona's 3rd congressional district. Do you get it? Do you get it? "Gunning?" Because she shoots, like, 17 different types of guns in this 43 second political ad which was apparently made back in 1985?

The ad begins with a voiceover saying, "This year a lot of folks think that this is our best shot at changing Congress. Of course, that all depends on the caliber of our candidates," which is followed by footage of Gorman shooting a number of rounds from a Tommy Gun.

The ad goes on to call Gorman a "Conservative Christian and a pretty fair shot," and also mentions that she was given a 100 percent rating by the National Rifle Association.

Likes: guns and God. Hates: taxes and Congress. There is literally nothing else you need to know. Take your AK-47 and shoot a hole in the ballot for Pamela Gorman, whoever she is! Bang! Bang! Bang!

Tags: Arizona, Guns, House of Representatives, NRA, Primaries, Religion, Republicans, Taxes

Texas Board of Education Approves New and Improved Jesus-Approved Version of U.S. History

Good for you, Texas! You did it!

A lot of people thought that you couldn't possibly legislate your way into a completely alternative reality than the rest of the world with just a little gumption and a fair share of prayer to Bronze Age Middle Eastern deities, but not me! I always had faith in you!

And you did not prove me wrong…

After three days of turbulent meetings, the Texas Board of Education on Friday voted to approve a social studies curriculum that will put a conservative stamp on history and economics textbooks, stressing the superiority of American capitalism, questioning the Founding Father’s commitment to a purely secular government and presenting Republican political philosophies in a more positive light…

The conservative members maintain that they are trying to correct what they see as a liberal bias among the teachers who proposed the curriculum. To that end, they made dozens of minor changes aimed at calling into question, among other things, concepts like the separation of church and state and the secular nature of the American Revolution…

They also included a plank to ensure that students learn about "the conservative resurgence of the 1980s and 1990s, including Phyllis Schalfly, the Contract With America, the Heritage Foundation, the Moral Majority and the National Rifle Association."

Great ideas all around. I've always said that we need more information about the NRA in our schoolbooks. Don't you feel like you had a dangerously low amount of semi-automatic rifle learnin' back in grade school? (Yes, you do, obviously.)

Oh, and that's not all! The Texas BOE also voted to keep out references to deviants like transvestites, transsexuals and Thomas Jefferson. It's about time someone booted that old queen, am I right. (Yes, of course I am, obviously.)

Tags: Bill of Rights, Christianity, Conservatives, Constitution, Education, Guns, Heritage Foundation, LGBT, Newt Gingrich, NRA, Phyllis Schlafly, Religion, Texas, Thomas Jefferson

The NRA Fires Back As Republicans Roll Over for Sonia Sotomayor

Despite all their tough filibustery talk, Senate Republicans yesterday threw in their respective towels, clearing Sonia Sotomayor for a quick confirmation vote before Congress recesses on August 7.

The stink of RINO traitorism hung heavy in the air…

"Your judicial record strikes me as pretty much in the mainstream of judicial decision-making," said Sen. John Cornyn, R-Texas. Added Sen. Lindsey Graham, R-S.C.: "You have, as a judge, been generally in the mainstream."

Oh really? Because that is the exact opposite of what scientific research says. When was the last time John Cornyn and Lindsey Grahamnesty set foot in mainstream America, anyway? Well, take heart, Mainstream-Americans. Someone's on your side…

From the outset, the National Rifle Association has respected the confirmation process and hoped for mainstream answers to bedrock questions. Unfortunately, Judge Sotomayor’s judicial record and testimony clearly demonstrate a hostile view of the Second Amendment and the fundamental right of self-defense guaranteed under the U.S. Constitution.

And so the NRA will not be voting for this terrible Constitution-hating judge.

Unless, of course, she proves her commitment to the Second Amendment by making good on her threat to shoot Tom Coburn.

Tags: Guns, John Cornyn, Lindsey Graham, NRA, Sonia Sotomayor, Tom Coburn