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Paul LePage
  • Sex Tips for Governors

    During a speech at the National Governors Association's winter meeting, Dr. Mehmet Oz identified a serious but also puke-inducing health problem: the shortage of gubernatorial sexytime:

    Oz also encouraged governors to lead by example by modeling a number of healthy behaviors…Noting that increased sexual activity leads to longer lifespans, Oz called on all governors to start having sex twice a week. No governors responded to Oz's suggestion about their sex lives.

    Governing is stressful and time-consuming, so here are a few tips to help our nation's governors get their groove back (ew, ew, ew):

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    Tags: Bobby Jindal, Paul LePage, Rick Perry, Rick Scott, Sex
  • Maine Gov. Paul LePage Sorry If His Nazi Comparison Offended You

    It all began innocently enough when, in his weekly radio address, Maine Governor Paul LePage compared the Internal Revenue Service to the Gestapo, saying, "We the people have been told there is no choice, you must buy health insurance or pay the new Gestapo — the IRS."

    As a Jew raised with stories of Nazi atrocities, as passed down by relatives who had personal experience with World War II in Europe, I was heartened by LePage's fanning of the historical flame. The plan by Nazi Germany's secret police to round up Jews, gays and political opponents, hand them health insurance cards and provide them with subsidized coverage is surely one of the 20th century's lesser known atrocities, but LePage is right that we must never forget.

    Unfortunately, LePage couldn't leave well enough alone and offered clarification of his original remarks…

    Said LePage: "What I am trying to say is the Holocaust was a horrific crime against humanity and, frankly, I would never want to see that repeated. Maybe the IRS is not quite as bad — yet."

    A reporter asked, "But they're headed in that direction?"

    LePage responded, "They're headed in that direction."

    The governor was then asked if he thought the IRS was going to kill a lot of people like the Nazis and he responded, "Yeah."

    Apparently, that wasn't good enough for some people. So today, LePage formally apologized. "Millions of innocent people were murdered and I apologize for my insensitivity to the word and the offense some took to my comparison of the IRS and the Gestapo," he said in another radio address. There. He's sorry you were offended.

    Photo by Diane Bondareff/NBC — NBCU Photo Bank/Getty Images

    Tags: Health Care, IRS, Jewish, Maine, Nazis, Paul LePage
  • Paul LePage Fantasizes About Bearded Ladies

    Indecision favorite Paul "Butt-Kissin' " LePage is up to his usual verbal hijinks again.

    This time, Maine's irrepressible scamp of a governor unleashed his matchless wit in an effort to pooh-pooh some scientists' claims that the chemical bisphenol A could lead to hormone disruptions and long-term health problems in humans. Take it away, Prattlin' Paul

    "Quite frankly, the science that I'm looking at says there is no [problem]," LePage said. "There hasn't been any science that identifies that there is a problem."

    LePage then added: "The only thing that I’ve heard is if you take a plastic bottle and put it in the microwave and you heat it up, it gives off a chemical similar to estrogen. So the worst case is some women may have little beards."

    Unsurprisingly, his reaction pissed off scientists and environmental activists alike. Eight states and the European Union have already restricted the use of the chemical in consumer products. Late last year, even Maine's own Board of Environmental Protection recommended banning BPA-laced products beginning in 2012.

    But in Paul LePage's whimsical world of fun and tomfoolery, these other entities are just lame-os who don't know how awesome baby food tastes when saturated with toxic chemicals. LePage 1, Science -1000000000.

    Tags: Environment, Health, Maine, Paul LePage, Science & Technology
  • Governor of Maine Invites Butt Affection Over MLK Day

    Last week, the governor of Maine told a reporter to convey the sentiment that the state's chapter of the NAACP could "kiss my butt." What exactly provoked this sensual and erotic declaration?

    Gov. Paul LePage, a businessman who this month became Maine's first Republican governor in 16 years, declined to attend or send a representative to a Martin Luther King Day event. When sponsors complained, LePage told a reporter Friday: "Tell them to kiss my butt."

    LePage retreated slightly the next day, saying he would be happy to meet with civil rights leaders to talk about the needs for all the people.

    Oh, the brand-new governor will surely rue the day he chose to speak so frankly! Surely the hue and cry from Maine's ginormous black population will ruin LePage's chances for reelection.

    Still, it helps to take into account that LePage, the eldest of 18 children born to a French-speaking family in rural Maine, probably has no idea what a Martin Luther King is.

    He does, however have an adopted black son, which adds an extra layer of weird to this tale.

    Tags: Maine, Martin Luther King, Martin Luther King Day, Paul LePage