Tweet Untweet: Nerd City, Population Romney

Romney just announced his agenda for his first day in office. So cool that he writes fan fiction!

— Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) May 18, 2012

Tags: Mitt Romney, Primaries, Tweet Untweet, Twitter

If Debt Were Delegates, Newt Gingrich Would Be the GOP Nominee

Frankly, it is fundamentally a travesty of justice, a perversion of reason, to award party nominations based upon such socialist criteria as votes received and delegates earned. I remain steadfast in my belief that it was the godless liberal and the anti-American Democrats who foisted this arcane system onto the U.S.

Clearly, a more free-market friendly capitalist-embracing way to decide the nominee to to see who can rack up the largest debt. That's the foundation upon which this country was founded after all…

[Newt Gingrich's] campaign remains the most indebted in the country according to Forbes research. As of March 31, 2012 (the most recent federal filing available), Gingrich’s campaign owed consultants and vendors $4.3 million — including more than $1 million for private jet service and $271,775.58 to the candidate himself for travel expenses.

Primary candidates often outspend themselves in pursuit of their party’s nomination, hoping that they’ll be able to raise enough money to cover bills once they’ve united the party’s donors. Even so, Gingrich’s campaign debt is unusually large: Rick Santorum, who lasted nearly as long as Gingrich in the Republican nominating contest and won twice as many delegates, has less than half as much campaign debt as of March 31.

This may seem excessive, but what you're not considering is how expensive it is to buy souvenir Tiffany refrigerator magnets for every city you travel through. And that's not even factoring in the cost of having them made custom for all the cities that don't offer them.

Which, by the way, is way more than you'd think.

Photo by John W. Adkisson/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Tags: Money, Newt Gingrich, Primaries, Republicans

Here Are Those GOP Presidential Candidate Butt Plugs You Ordered

I'm not one-hundred percent certain I understand why you ordered a bunch of butt plugs contoured to reflect "approval ratings amongst registered Republican voters for each of the GOP presidential candidates," but I'm sure you have your reasons…

It would appear as though that sudden uptick in support Rick Santorum received back in February may prove to be more painful than originally expected.

Tags: Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Polls, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, Sex

Ron Paul Supporters Fight Back Against MSM Lies About Paul's Campaign

Now, you may be under the mistaken impression that Ron Paul's presidential campaign has come to an end. But that's only because you get your information from the anti-Paul mainstream media. Or from Ron Paul.

However, what you would know if you were following Ron Paul's army of emphatic supporters on YouTube, is that this is all misinformation, designed by the powers-that-be in a vain attempt to somehow halt the federalist hero's slow, steady and inevitable march into the Oval Office. Please allow RoxieBord to explain…

More Ron Paul supporters set you straight after the jump.

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Tags: Primaries, Republicans, Ron Paul

Tweet Untweet: It's Been Quite a Roller Coaster, Ron Paul

Ron Paul drops out of campaign. He finally saw the sign that said, "You Must Be This Tall to Run For President."

— Guy Nicolucci (@Nicolucci1899) May 14, 2012

Tags: Primaries, Ron Paul, Tweet Untweet, Twitter