Recapping the Senate Health Care Vote: Confusion, Lollygagging and More

True fact: The U.S. Senate has not held a Christmas Eve vote since 1895, when Senator Byrd was serving his first term. (That's also when the Democrats began trying to pass health care reform, I believe). To mark this moment, last night Sarah Palin offered some inspiring words and, uh, letters:

c tomrrw's Healthcare Takeover vote=the sleeping giant will awaken&action will b takn by"average"Americans as lite shines on big govt growth

Yeah, right. The sleeping giant would've had to get up at an ungodly hour, and I know for a fact the "average" American prefers to hit snooze. At any rate, I watched the whole thing so you didn't have to. Recap below.

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Tags: Bernie Sanders, Democrats, Harry Reid, Health Care, Joe Biden, Mitch McConnell, Republicans, Robert Byrd, Senate

Robert Byrd Selfishly Remains Alive Despite GOP Prayers

As I'm sure everybody knows by now, the Senate voted 60-40 (right along party lines) in favor of the health care reformish bill of recent debate, thus decimating Republican hopes of a filibuster. And do you know which quasi-Democratic senator America really has to blame for this?

No, it's not Ben Nelson, who, at zero hour, decided that he was more in favor of health care reform than in the subjugation of women.

And it wasn't Joe Lieberman, who — after seeing to the gutting of substance from the bill — apparently ran out of plausible reasons to torture Democrats.

Nope, it wasn't Bernie Sanders, who, I'm guessing, eventually got around to looking around the room at the people he was talking to, slumped his shoulders and gave up hope of actually accomplishing anything non-cosmetic.

The real villain in this health care reform bill passage is the ailing 4,947-year-old Dixiecrat Robert Byrd who obstinately refused to die over the weekend, despite the most strenuous prayers of Republicans…

At 4 p.m. Sunday afternoon — nine hours before the 1 a.m. vote that would effectively clinch the legislation's passage — Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.) went to the Senate floor to propose a prayer. "What the American people ought to pray is that somebody can't make the vote tonight," he said. "That's what they ought to pray."

It was difficult to escape the conclusion that Coburn was referring to the 92-year-old, wheelchair-bound Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.V.) who has been in and out of hospitals and lay at home ailing. It would not be easy for Byrd to get out of bed in the wee hours with deep snow on the ground and ice on the roads — but without his vote, Democrats wouldn't have the 60 they needed.

To be totally fair to Sen. Coburn, I suppose he could have been praying for an icy car accident fatality of any one of the 60 Democratic senators.

I don't mean to mischaracterize his words.

Tags: Ben Nelson, Bernie Sanders, Democrats, Health Care, Joe Lieberman, Republicans, Robert Byrd, Senate, Tom Coburn

From the Pork Barrel: Never Forget the Death Star

* If you don't rebuild, the Jedis win. They hate our way of life.

* This article here says that people's faith in the accuracy in news reporting has hit its lowest point in two decades. But, you know, I don't fucking believe that shit.

* Sen, Robert Byrd just wants to protect young gay men from getting molested by Julius Ceasar. Or something.

* Majority of doctors found to be socialist scum.

* Double-Yoo Tee Eff, ACORN? If you're going to be corrupt, do you have to be moronic about it, too?

Tags: 9/11, ACORN, Corruption, DADT, Health, Health Care, LGBT, Movies, Polls, Pork Barrel, Robert Byrd, Senate

Sen. Robert Byrd Mildly Unhappy with Senate Cafeteria Gravy

Senator Robert Byrd is tweeting…

You know what, you can make fun of the guy all you like. But he's like 352 years older than me, and his Twitter feed is already way more interesting than than mine.

(via Cajun Boy)

Tags: Edward Kennedy, Massachusetts, Robert Byrd, Senate, West Virginia

Robert Byrd Fine, Ted Kennedy Recovering

It's pretty official now that Sen. Robert Byrd had not fallen ill alongside Sen. Ted Kennedy at the presidential luncheon…

Sen. Robert Byrd's office says that, contrary to media reports, he did not have a medical emergency. He left the congressional luncheon because he was disturbed by what happened to Ted Kennedy. Early accounts suggested that Byrd had trouble eating.

Byrd "is currently in his own office… and is doing fine, though he remains very concerned about his close friend, Ted Kennedy," said a spokesman.

This is really good news.

Not only is it nice to know that Byrd is okay, but it also would have been too weird if two U.S. senators got sick during the same lunch. We'd have to fire the official food-taster.

More good news: Ted Kennedy seems to be recovering from the seizure he had…

A statement from the hospital where Kennedy was taken says that the senator is awake and answering questions. His son Patrick and wife Vicki are with him. President Obama has already phoned to check on his condition. Patrick Kennedy told George Stephanopoulos that his father is feeling fine.

Kennedy was at a table with fellow Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry and others…

The bad news?

This will give John Kerry a lot of opportunities to speak to the press.

Tags: Edward Kennedy, Inauguration, Robert Byrd, Senate