Roll Call: Ask Not for Whom the Bell Tolls…It Tolls for Thee

• This Ron Paul Internet fan has quite a spring in his step!

• McCain: Hey guys…why not attack me? Come on, plenty to attack over here! Hey! HEY!
• But first be a person who endorses people.
• Huckabee is attacking Romney religiously (get it?).
• Don't need no credit card to ride this train.

Tags: Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, Roll Call, Ron Paul

Roll Call: Turn On Your Heart Light

• The Pump-o 3000 Robotic Enginator has been repaired.

• Uh, yes, we have a question from a C. Dodd of Connecticut…
• He is, he is, he is Superman, and he knows what's happening.
• Romney: "You sir, are no…well, you know…"
• Reunited and it feels so…awkward.

Tags: Al Gore, Chris Dodd, Dick Cheney, George W. Bush, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, Roll Call, Rudy Giuliani

Roll Call: Thanks a Lott, Pal

• Trent Lott to follow in Strom Thurmond's footsteps, fades into memory.

• Moving picture advertisement boasts elderly man's youthful frivolity.
• Obama plays Jamie Lee Curtis to Hillary's Lindsay Lohan.
• Does Huckabee bear the mark of the liberal beast?
• Ron Paul says he will raise almost as much as a real candidate.

Tags: Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Roll Call, Ron Paul, Trent Lott

Roll Call: Tension

• Obama climbs up on top of Hillary; lazy web writer makes pedestrian sexual double entrendre, sips coffee.
• Murdered gay man's family give GOP candidates opportunity to highlight skills in evasiveness.
• Bush pardons more administration officials.
• Hillary can't wait to debate Republicans, get sworn in, choose curtains for presidential library.
• Giuliani and NASCAR: Loud, obnoxious and popular with rednecks.

Tags: George W. Bush, Hillary Clinton, Roll Call, Rudy Giuliani

Roll Call: Another Fist

• Mike Huckabee proves he has better screen presence than Chuck Norris.

• Kucinich spreads 'em wide for Larry Flynt.
• Giuliani, McCain vie for bragging rights to horrible, horrible American tragedy.
• Bill O'Reilly tracked down in Afghanistan cave by U.S. Marines, eludes capture.
• Cruel new poll in Iowa gets John Edwards' hopes up.

Tags: Bill O'Reilly, Dennis Kucinich, John Edwards, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Roll Call, Rudy Giuliani