Tworld News: Week of May 2, 2011

Some say Twitter was originally called 'The website for immediate, brief, sometimes-funny news updates' until Justin Timberlake told them to drop the 'The'.

Even a terrorist mastermind like Osama couldn't have seen through this rouse: Just type in your home address and phone number and instantly receive 1000 free trial minutes of AOL. Too good to be true,  too sweet to resist…

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Tweet the Press: The 20/20 Royal Wedding Special Edition

Tune in to 20/20 on ABC at 8/5p, and follow along right here on Indecision, in Witstream's Tweet the Press lounge, or on Twitter (#tweetthepress and #royalwedding) as we — plus Dave Holmes & Damien Fahey and whole bunch of the funniest brains to be found on Twitter and Witstream – cover serious news program 20/20's  serious news coverage of the seriously fabulous Royal Wedding.

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Palestinians Trying to Overshadow Wills and Kate

Everyone on Earth knows that the most important thing happening this week is the marriage of one inbred (but seemingly very nice) English helicopter pilot to some hot chick. Everyone, that is, except for the Palestinians, who remain annoyingly obsessed with lifting themselves out of poverty and desperation.

Hey, guys, we don't even know who designed Kate's wedding thong yet. Try and focus on something important, maybe? No? Ugh, fine. Then go ahead and form a coalition government, as if that's some kind of big development…

The two main Palestinian factions, Fatah and Hamas, announced Wednesday that they were putting aside years of bitter rivalry to create an interim unity government and hold elections within a year, a surprise move that promised to reshape the diplomatic landscape of the Middle East.

The deal, brokered in secret talks by the caretaker Egyptian government, was announced at a news conference in Cairo where the two negotiators referred to each side as brothers and declared a new chapter in the Palestinian struggle for independence, hobbled in recent years by the split between the Fatah-run West Bank and Hamas-run Gaza.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz… Oh, I'm sorry, was someone saying something about World Peace or the destruction of Israel or something? We couldn't hear it over the sound of ourselves screaming with excitement over the marriage of two insanely rich white people in the country that maybe had something to do with the division of territories in the Middle East, or something?

Whatevs! WHO BAKED THE CAAAAAKE?!

Tweet the Press: 20/20's Royal Wedding Special – Thursday, April 28th

Join us — plus Dave Holmes & Damien Fahey and whole bunch of the funniest brains to be found on Twitter and Witstream – as we cover serious news program 20/20's  serious news coverage of the seriously fabulous Royal Wedding between Kate Middleton and one of those British prince guys (Prince Freddy?). It's going to be just like a fairy tale, in that anchor Elizabeth Vargas is going to throw her co-anchor Chris Cuomo into a wood-burning stove. (Probably. (No promises.))

So, tune in to ABC this upcoming Thursday, April 28, 8/5p, and follow along right here on Indecision, in Witstream's Tweet the Press lounge, or on Twitter (#tweetthepress and #royalwedding).