From the Pork Barrel: Turbaconducken!

* Lame duck sessions suck. But maybe if they were stuffed inside a chicken and a turkey… And then all wrapped up in bacon… Oh, that's the spot.

* Basil at IMAO: Bail out the Big Three up north or build a fence around the South to keep all the unemployed Democrats out.

* Mo Rocca: Who would make a better teacher for the Obama girls: Mrs. Garrett or Edna Krabappel?

* Asking, telling: Still frowned upon by upcoming Obama administration.

* 23/6's Lee Camp: Ten questions that must be asked of Barack Obama before he's sworn in.

* Saxby Chambliss is camera shy.

* Al Franken closing in on Norm Coleman, according to Franken's personal brand of math.

* Patton Oswalt speaks (briefly) about election night blogging here on Indy.

* SNL looking for an actual black guy to play the kind of black guy.

Tags: Al Franken, Auto Industry, Barack Obama, Economy, Election Day, IMAO, LGBT, Malia Obama, Minnesota, Mo Rocca, Norm Coleman, Patton Oswalt, Pork Barrel, Sasha Obama, Saturday Night Live, Saxby Chambliss

YOU DECIDE Caption Challenge: John McCain for Saxby Chambliss

Oh, and don't forget to leave messages conveying your complete disgust with our choices for finalists along with a healthy dose of contempt for your fellow contributors' captions. It wouldn't be a caption challenge without them.

Tags: Caption Challenge, John McCain, Saxby Chambliss, Senate

Caption Challenge: John McCain for Saxby Chambliss

You can't keep a good man down. For very long, at any rate. John McCain is already back on the campaign trail, but this time he's gunning for his old friend Georgia Senator Saxby Chambliss.

Kindly, please consider leaving your caption in the comments of this post.

Tags: Caption Challenge, Georgia, John McCain, Saxby Chambliss, Senate

Saxby Chambliss Getting the Most Republican Attention Since Terri Schiavo

Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-GA) is facing a run-off election on December 2, and his Republican buddies are lined up halfway to South Carolina for the chance to pimp him to weary voters.

While Democratic challenger Jim Martin is forced to make due with a team of "Obama surrogates," Chambliss has mobilized so many A-List Republicans, you'd think Terri Schiavo had moved to Georgia.

Among the GOP stars due to appear…

John McCain
What He Brings to the Table: 52% of the Georgia vote.  Tell-all stories about Joe the Plumber.
What's in It for Him: Opportunity to prove he is still alive.

Sarah Palin
What She Brings to the Table: The concession speech she believed she'd get to deliver for McCain.
What's in It for Her: If she can destroy Chambliss's campaign as well, that's one less challenger for 2012.

Mike Huckabee
What He Brings to the Table: The TV star power of Oprah Winfrey, if Oprah were a white, southern ex-governor who built an entire career on weight loss.
What's in It for Him: The chance that someone might let him play "Free Bird" again.

Mitt Romney
What He Brings to the Table: Money. Otherwise he wouldn't be invited.
What's in It for Him: More press footage of himself he can masturbate to.

Rudy Giuliani
What He Brings to the Table: The missing link between Jim Martin and the 9/11 terrorists.
What's in It for Him: Doesn't matter. We already know he's willing to give up his reputation, his career and $59 million for one measly delegate.

And if for some reason the runoff drags all the way out to 2012, Chambliss will have no problem assembling the same cast of characters.  He can just set up a TV camera in Iowa and watch this crowd come racing like flies to a turd.

Tags: Georgia, Jim Martin, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, Rudy Giuliani, Sarah Palin, Saxby Chambliss

Republicans Retroactively Throw Ted Stevens Under the Bus

As the final votes are counted, it now looks like America's favorite 84-year-old felon, Alaska Senator Ted Stevens, is likely to lose his reelection bid…

Mr. Begich led Mr. Stevens by just 814 votes after about 57,000 additional ballots were counted on Wednesday. So far, about 279,000 votes have been counted in the Senate race, and about 35,000 more remain to be counted. It could be next week before the count is complete.

His fellow Republican Senators are a taking a two-pronged approach to this turn of events: Vow to expel him from the Senate, but secretly hope that he loses the election so they won't actually have to do it.

“First of all, I hope Senator Stevens is successful in being re-elected. And assuming that he is, I intend to support any motion to remove him,” [Sen. Saxby] Chambliss said during a press conference with John Ensign of Nevada, the chairman of the National Republican Senatorial Committee.

Sen. Jim DeMint of South Carolina has served notice that he’ll seek to expel Stevens from the Senate Republican Conference at a meeting next Tuesday.

While Ensign said that he, too, would vote to expel Stevens from the GOP circle — a move that would foreshadow expulsion by the entire Senate — the Nevada senator counseled waiting to see whether Stevens wins his race.

“If he actually wins the election, then you have to expel him twice. And so it’s probably better to let Alaska — it’s probably going to take a while to count all the votes up there — let that take place, then after the first of the year deal with it,” Ensign said.

Stevens' losing the election would be a blessing for his colleagues — if he were to win, not only would they need to wade through the mire of expelling him, they'd need to serve with whoever Alaska Governor Sarah Palin appointed to replace him. Which would most likely be Sarah Palin.

Of course, what would really be fortuitous for Senate Republicans is if Stevens were to quietly die of old age. But no one's going to come out and say that.

Tags: Alaska, Jim DeMint, John Ensign, Sarah Palin, Saxby Chambliss, Senate, Ted Stevens