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Seamus Romney
  • Monty Burns Endorses "Meat" Romney Over "Broccoli" Obama [VIDEO]

    Barack Obama may have managed to secure the endorsements of foreign anti-American entities like Britain's The Economist and New York City's Michael Bloomberg.

    But Mitt Romney can sleep easy knowing that he's still supported by good patriotic Americans like Springfield's 0.00001%…

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    Tags: Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, Seamus Romney
  • Obama Hits Mitt Romney with a Seamus Joke

    A week ago, the candidates traded the insults "Romney Hood" and "Obamaloney." We can all agree that those are elementary school level taunts. Today is graduation day, because Obama just raised it up to middle-school level taunts. In a stump speech, he went for a Seamus joke. Sorry, did I say "Seamus?" I meant "shameless."

    Many hoped that Paul Ryan entering the race would signal a return to real issues. That the election might mature into a conversation about Medicare, the economy and the two parties' diverging solutions. Fortunately, right in the nick of time, Obama was able to put the real issues on the roof of America's car and let them diarrhea all over our back window. We're back to smack-talking! Expect more of this…

    Strap your kennel in. It's going to be a bumpy ride until November.

    Tags: Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, Reince Priebus, Seamus Romney
  • Our Endorsements: Sarah Silverman Cuts to the Chase

    * Sarah Silverman's NSFW indecent proposal.

    * What is this "Afghanistan" you speak of, from The Onion.

    * The New Yorker political cartoon of the day for all you thinkers out there.

    * Sean Lennon asks you not to frack his mother on Jimmy Fallon.

    * Watch Romney get pulled over during the Seamus incident, from Funny or Die.

    Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Daily Links, Environment, Funny or Die, Jimmy Fallon, Mitt Romney, Sarah Silverman, Seamus Romney, Sheldon Adelson, The New Yorker, The Onion, Theodore Roosevelt, Yoko Ono
  • Conservatives: Barack Obama Is a Socialist Dog Eater

    Ever since Mitt Romney decided the roof of his station wagon was just the right height for Seamus, his Irish Setter, he has been dogged — sorry — by accusations of callousness and reckless disregard for his pet's welfare.

     But it was only a matter of time before the conservative Daily Caller bit back with the stunning revelation (read: a passage from Barack Obama's 17-year-old memoir Dreams From My Father) that as a child growing up in Indonesia, Obama was fed dog meat

    "So what? It was a long time ago," you say. "He was a lot younger. Customs are different there. He was just doing what his stepfather told him. And hey, you can't even prove that the dogs were ever left on top of a car, you racist."

    Hey, whatever you have to tell yourself, libs. Say what you want about Romney, but at least he only put a dog on the roof of his car, not the roof of his mouth. And whenever you bring up the one, we're going to bring up the other.

    It's no fun when we push back, is it? That's why it's so much fun.

    Actually, contrary to the Daily Caller, it's a lot of fun when the dubious-to-Americans dietary choices of a 9 or 10 year old child living abroad are compared to Romney's adult decision-making in a ham-fisted effort to play up the president's "otherness." Still, this puts much of Obama's first term in perspective. No wonder the Blue Dogs in the Democratic caucus have been skeptical of his initiatives. And every year he's been in office, there's been suspiciously fewer and fewer of them…

    Lest anyone think this fauxtroversy was confined to right-wing blogs, Romney adviser Eric Fehrnstrom, of Etch-a-Sketch fame, was quick to join the outrage. With the one of the first blows in the dog wars struck by David Axelrod when he tweeted a picture of Bo, riding in the Obama's limousine, with the caption "How loving owners transport their dogs," Fehrnstrom struck back by retweeting Axelrod with the comment, "In hindsight, a chilling photo." So if nothing else, talking about Obama's childhood culinary adventures must be a welcome relief from Fehrnstrom's regular diet of foot in mouth.

    Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Animals, Barack Obama, Conservatives, Mitt Romney, Seamus Romney
  • Did Seamus Romney Run Away After Car Roof Incident?

    Uh oh. Is this a potential time bomb waiting to explode for Mitt Romney's campaign?

    Mitt Romney may not have told the whole truth about the scandalous tale of his Irish Setter, Seamus, being strapped to the roof of his car during a 12-hour family road trip to Canada. According to a trusted Politicker tipster, two of Mr. Romney's sons had an off-record conversation with reporters where they revealed the dog ran away when they reached their destination on that infamous journey in 1983.

    Mr. Romney's wife, Ann, has previously said Seamus survived the trip and went on to live to a "ripe old age." As of this writing, Mr. Romney's campaign has not responded to multiple requests for comment on this story.

    My prediction for the October surprise: A decrepit boney 30-year-old Irish Setter hobbles into a Mitt Romney campaign event along the Canadian border. It stands there unsteadily for a long moment as the cheering crowd slowly descends into reverent silence. The dog then takes a shit on the floor and collapses dead.

    Mitt Romney gets a five-point boost in the polls with conservative-leaning independents.

    Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Animals, Mitt Romney, Primaries, Puppies!, Republicans, Seamus Romney