Eugene Mirman Wants to Talk to You About the Midterm Elections

Dragons, wolves, horses and libertarians. You know just regular political analysis stuff…

Tags: Arizona, Bloggers on Camera, Cramming for Midterms, Eugene Mirman, Harry Reid, Islam, Midterms, Nevada, Sarah Palin, Sharron Angle, Taxes, Tea Party, Thomas Jefferson, Unemployment, Video

Quote Unquote: Point Goes to Angle

Sharron Angle, to her political opponent during Nevada's senatorial debate last night…

"Man up, Harry Reid!"

For the first time in the history of ever, Sharron Angle and I agree on something.

However, it would probably be a little more meaningful coming from someone who didn't run and hide from reporters like they were demons rising from the Earth during the black days of the Tribulation. Still, it's nice that somebody said it.

Tags: Debates, Harry Reid, Nevada, Quote Unquote, Senate, Sharron Angle

FreedomWorks Explains How the Tea Party Represents the Political Center

Brendan Steinhauser — who, as a director for FreedomWorks, helps organize grassroots for campaigns for Verizon, Phillip Morris and the Koch Brothers — talks about the origins of the Tea Party movement and explains how, once politicians like Sharron Angle and Marco Rubio head into Washington next year, far-left ideologue Barack Obama is going to have to start catering to the center ("the center" being people like Sharron Angle and Marco Rubio)…

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, FreedomWorks, Sharron Angle, Stephen Colbert, Tea Party, The Colbert Report, Video

This Election Day, a Large Percentage of the People Who Stand in Line to Vote Believe That Our Socialist Nazi President Prays to Mecca Three Times a Day

Brace yourself, 'cause it's gonna be worse than the DMV out there…

What?! All of those people are voting? That's, like, a lot of people all voting against me. Ugh! This is hopeless. We're doomed! Guess I might as well stay home and do something useful. Like bitch about stuff on the Internet.

Man, this country is totally going to shit.

Tags: Barack Obama, Christine O’Donnell, Democrats, Election Day, Glenn Beck, Midterms, Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Sharron Angle

Coalition of Idiots Gives Sharron Angle $14 Million

If you needed further evidence that America is home to many hateful imbeciles, feature this: Tea Partier Sharron Angle — she of the unnecessary extra "r" — raised $14 million in the third quarter. The Republican Senate nominee from Nevada currently trails behind incumbent Harry Reid by…um…about 0.4 percent.

In order to understand her appeal to mouth-breathers and obese couch-monsters, let's examine the finer points of this very special woman's outlook on life, liberty, and the pursuit of crappiness…

* She believes abortion should always be wrong, including cases of rape and incest. She discussed what she might say if presented with a young woman who had been raped and impregnated by her own father: "I think that two wrongs don't make a right. And I have been in the situation of counseling young girls, not 13 but 15, who have had very at risk, difficult pregnancies. And my counsel was to look for some alternatives, which they did. And they found that they had made what was really a lemon situation into lemonade." Ah, yes. There's nothing more cooling and refreshing on a hot summer's day than a tall glass of incest, maybe with a sprig of unwanted pregnancy as a garnish. Mmm mmm mmm!

* In a 2009 radio interview, Angle emphatically agreed with her interviewer when he said, "We have domestic enemies. We have home-born homegrown enemies in our system. And I for one think we have some of those enemies in the walls of the Senate and the Congress." Who are these domestic enemies? Presumably everyone who isn't a delusional Christ superfan. It seems there's a good chance the percentage of non-nutjobs in Congress will shrink in November, so Sharron Angle should be happy about that.

* In response to a question about "Muslims taking over the U.S.," Angle replied, "Dearborn, Michigan, and Frankford, Texas are on American soil, and under Constitutional law. Not Sharia law. And I don't know how that happened in the United States. It seems to me there is something fundamentally wrong with allowing a foreign system of law to even take hold in any municipality or government situation in our United States." Translation: Muslim Americans will probably not be invited to celebrate Ramadan at the White House once Sharron Angle becomes Queen Lord and Savior-Goddess.

Now, if all of that genius political theory and sentiment isn't worth $14 million, consider the fact that she is an adorable, tiny grandmother. You wouldn't begrudge someone's grandma a cool $14 million, would you?

Answer carefully; Sharron Angle is listening, with the full force of her rape-baby lovin' soul.

Tags: Abortion, Islam, Money, Nevada, Religion, Senate, Sharron Angle, Tea Party