Unable to make much progress on a plan for saving the Eurozone economies from a spiraling debt crisis, Barack Obama and the other leaders of the G-8 gathered at Camp David turned to another activity in which any exciting action is strictly forbidden — soccer.
Despite the fact that we're presently amid a three-year long celebration of There's No World Cup This Year, apparently there's still international soccer being played. Pool reports offered a behind the scenes look at Obama's soccer party with "German Chancellor Angela Merkel, British Prime Minister David Cameron and other world leaders" including "some playful trash talking… in many languages."
Unfortunately, few details have emerged as to the nature of the trash talk, but good sense and a respect for national stereotypes allows us to fill in the blanks…
FRANCOIS HOLLANDE: Haha, Angela! Bayern's getting screwed harder than an underage prostitute at Villa Gernetto.
ANGELA MERKEL: (Scowls)
Tags: G-8, Germany, Soccer, Sports, United Kingdom
There aren't enough tweets in the world to cover all the wild news that went down this week. That's not true, there definitely, absolutely are, but these are the best.
In unfortunate political news, we were sadly reminded of our hesitance to elect a woman for President: About once every month they get these debilitating, attitude-effecting migraines. It's just too bad.
Does this mean that Buzz Lightyear will have to change his slogan and that store will just be called "Bed, Bath and Honestly That's It"?
Tags: Michele Bachmann, NASA, Rupert Murdoch, Soccer, Tim Pawlenty, Twitter, Tworld News
Isn't it time that your news was delivered in bite-sized, funny, essentially fact-free form (on purpose)?
Every time a 'free lunch' bell rings, an econ teacher blacks out.
Tags: Afghanistan, Barack Obama, DADT, Evolution, John McCain, Julian Assange, LGBT, Military, NASA, Russia, Science & Technology, Soccer, Sports, Star Wars, Tworld News, WikiLeaks
The summer games may be over, but it appears that their impact will hover over South Africa for some time to come. Just hopefully not aurally…
Andy Ross is a writer and performer in New York. You can see more of his work at his daily comedy blog here.
Tags: Africa, Postcards from the News, Soccer, South Africa, Sports
Breaking News! Spain won the World Cup yesterday afternoon! You heard it here first, folks! Paella for all!
This is obviously fantastic news for the people of Spain, whose national team has never previously brought home La Copa del Mundo. But it's even better news for us, because we really didn't have all that many Daily Show clips about The Netherlands. So, let's all enjoy our good fortune with a refreshing collection of Spanish Daily Show clips…
March 15, 2004: History of Spain
More videos after the jump.
The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.
Tags: Jon Stewart, Soccer, Spain, Sports, Stephen Colbert, The Daily Show