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Tim Kaine
  • Tim Kaine Will Make You Regret Giving Barack Obama Your Email Address


    Team Obama — I'm lookin' at you, Plouffe — has one week left to wrap up its spamming, because once the president-elect takes the oath of office, the use of his campaign contact lists will be restricted by law.

    So what will become of all the email addresses Obama collected? Well, according to reports, he's thinking of giving his lists to Tim Kaine, the new leader of the Democratic National Committee. You should probably set up an inbox filter right now…

    During the campaign, the Obama operation garnered approximately 13 million e-mail addresses, a million sign-ups for the Obama camp's text-messaging service, 2 million participants in the campaign's proprietary social network on MyBarackObama.com, and 5 million supporters on more than 15 other social networking sites including Facebook, according to a report by Washingtonpost.com. [...]

    But the use of Obama's lists is not without its challenges. "It's a lot easier to get 13 million people excited about one thing like electing a particular person," [technology expert Andrew] Rasiej said. "That's very different from getting them to switch to new, more energy-efficient light bulbs or to stop driving their SUVs."

    Maybe I've come down with that list fatigue people keep talking about, but at this point I just can't tell which is more exciting: being told to buy crappy souvenir mugs I can't afford, or being scolded about my light bulbs.

    I guess I could muster one final burst of e-nthusiasm if Governor Kaine promised to email us shocking, never-before-seen photos of his freaky eyebrow.


    Tags: Barack Obama, David Plouffe, DNC, Internet, Tim Kaine
  • Terry McAuliffe Seeks to Bring Some Much-Needed Insanity to Virginia Governor's Office

    Let's face it, Virginia.  Your governor, Tim Kaine, is a little… well… sane.  I mean he's a really great guy.  He's done wonders for the state budget.  But why isn't he on MSNBC screaming at Chris Matthews?  Why isn't he on the Daily Show, bewildering the hell out of Jon Stewart?  Why isn't he riding a mechanical bull into the wee hours of the night?

    Virginia, what you need is a healthy dose of Terry McAuliffe

    Former Democratic National Committee chairman Terry McAuliffe filed papers Monday necessary to run for governor in Virginia next year. McAuliffe established his campaign committee, Friends of Terry McAuliffe, with the State Board of Elections and will tour Virginia for the next 60 days before making his candidacy certain…

    A native of upstate New York, McAuliffe, 51, has lived in Virginia for about 17 years. He lives in the Washington, D.C., suburb of McLean.

    Interesting fact about McAuliffe:  He's not very good at winning elections.  The Democrats lost seats in Congress throughout his term as DNC Chair.  He couldn't get John Kerry into the Oval Office.  And his candidate for president lost her primary, although it's possible they haven't told that to Terry yet.

    But you'd better believe he'll stir things up in Virginia.  Whether downing shots with Joe Scarborough or hosting visits from Pope Hillary Clinton, a Governor McAuliffe will make Tim Kaine seem as boring as his successor, Mark Warner.

    Well, actually that's a bit harsh.  How about only as boring as a monotone recitation of The Iliad in the original Ancient Greek with pauses for the earth's crust to harden?


    Tags: Hillary Clinton, Mark Warner, Terry McAuliffe, Tim Kaine, Virginia
  • Virginia Governor Tim Kaine Responds to Our Insults

    Last week, you read in this space that Virginia Governor Tim Kaine's freakish eyebrow would be the downfall of his vice presidential prospects, the Democratic Party, and humanity in general.

    For those keeping score, we're one for three so far.

    The story took a new turn last night, when Kaine appeared on the Daily Show and directly responded to our critique. He acknowledged his Quasimodo-like visage and presented Jon Stewart with an "arched eyebrow" pin to commemorate his failure as a VP contender.



    On a personal note, this was a revelation. Having spent roughly 15 years trying to communicate my views to aloof politicians, I now only regret that I hadn’t mocked their collective appearance far, far sooner.

    In hopes of extending the streak, I'll now officially submit that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin dresses far too conservatively for the American public.

    You can thank me down the road for the yet-to-be-taped but surely imminent hottest. Daily Show. ever.


    Tags: Colorado, Democratic National Convention, Denver, Jon Stewart, Sarah Palin, The Daily Show, Tim Kaine, Virginia
  • BREAKING: Governor Tim Kaine to Appear on The Daily Show Tomorrow Night

    Indecision 2008 just got word that tomorrow night's guest will be Governor Tim Kaine from Virginia.  Tim Kaine was widely speculated to be Obama's VP choice, and will have a lot to say about the 2008 election.  Check back Wednesday morning for the interview.

    Below, watch Jon Stewart talk about Tim Kaine's response to the 2006 State of the Union.


    Tags: Jon Stewart, The Daily Show, Tim Kaine
  • Governor Tim Kaine's Freakish Eyebrow Will Take Down the Democratic Party

    Time to cross Virginia's Democratic Governor Tim Kaine off the short list for Barack Obama's running mate.

    The man has no chance of being elected to the second-highest office in the Free World because — and this is so obvious I almost feel foolish reporting it — his left eyebrow is inadequate.

    According to Roll Call, the newspaper of Capitol Hill…

    Kaine's brows — arched, wiggly and what most people remember from the Democrat's rebuttal to the State of the Union speech in 2006 — have become one of the chief objections from some pundits to Kaine taking a spot on the Democratic ticket.

    News media in Kaine's home state couldn't agree more. The Hampton Roads Daily Press has published its "Top 10 Reasons Not To Choose Kaine," and topping the list — ahead of minimal name recognition and lack of foreign policy experience — was The Eyebrow.

    While this news illuminates the obvious point that Tim Kaine must no longer be allowed around children — much less the White House — it raises problems for Obama as he searches for a running mate without a grotesque deformity.

    Whether it's Bill Richardson and his creepy goatee or Hillary Clinton and her second X chromosome, most of Obama's VP options possess physical quirks even more distracting than the Senator's own ears.

    This is not to say that John McCain has it much easier. Anyone taken a close look at Joe Lieberman's jowls recently?


    Tags: Barack Obama, Bill Richardson, Hillary Clinton, Joe Lieberman, John McCain, Tim Kaine, Veepstakes, Virginia