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Todd Palin
  • Joe McGinniss Says Gross Things About Sarah Palin

    This site isn't typically a bastion of pro-Palin sentiment, and I'm not generally a huge fan of hers, but there's something icky-gross about Joe McGinniss' "revelations" in his sure-to-be-a-bestseller-anywhere-but-Wasilla book, "The Rogue."

    McGinniss moved in next door to the Palins (creepy) and spent a year of his life speaking to people who really, really hate Sarah Palin. Understandably, Todd is pissed

    Todd Palin is ripping author Joe McGinniss' upcoming book, which claims his wife, Sarah, had a sexual tryst with hoops star Glen Rice and dabbled with marijuana and cocaine.

    Todd described the book as full of "disgusting lies, innuendo and smear" in a statement and blasted the best-selling author for stalking the ex-Alaska governor and former vice presidential candidate.

    Personally, I think we, the American public, ought to be mad, too — if only because McGinniss's big revelations are so boring. Oh, wow, a pretty, wannabe-famous lady allegedly banged a sexy, soon-to-be-famous dude? That has never happened before in the history of the world, ever.

    She allegedly did coke off an oil drum? So what? It's not like there's anything else to do in Alaska besides recreational drugs, and it's not like there's anything else to do them off of besides various objects related to Big Oil. These people live in friggin' igloos. Have you ever tried to do a key bump in an igloo? The key gets really cold, and it can stick to sensitive mucous membranes like the nose. It's dangerous! And don't even get me started on the logistics of trying to do an 8-ball with a polar bear. One word: awkward.

    If Joe McGinniss owes anyone an apology, it's the American people. As if we don't have enough disappointment in our lives these days.

    Photo by Shekhar Yadav/India Today Group/Getty Images

    Tags: Alaska, Basketball, Books, Drugs, Glen Rice, Joe McGinniss, Sarah Palin, Sex, Sports, Todd Palin
  • Sarah Palin to Visit Real America on "One Nation" Country-Wide Bus Tour

    Aw, man! It just keeps getting better and better!

    Yesterday, we found out that Sarah Palin found out about Sarah Palin's cinematic ode to Sarah Palin, and today we're getting word of Sarah Palin's nationwide tour in support of Sarah Palin

    In a move designed to propel her closer to a presidential run, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin will set out on a bus tour of the country on Sunday, making stops at symbolic sites along the way.

    "Starting this weekend, Sarah Palin will embark on a 'One Nation' tour of historical sites that were key to the formation, survival, and growth of the United States of America," SarahPAC treasurer Tim Crawford said in a statement to RealClearPolitics. "The tour will originate in Washington, D.C. It will proceed north up the east coast."…

    Members of Palin's immediate family are expected to join her on the trip, which will eventually take her through key early-voting states.

    Of course Palin's family members "are expected to join her on the trip." Why would they not be? That would be like Gallagher going on tour without his sledgehammer and crate of watermelons.

    Can you even imagine the crushing disappointment that would be experienced by her fans if they left the show without being splattered mawkish sentimentality. That's what you go to see her for. Everybody knows that!

    Photo by Darren Hauck/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Bristol Palin, Primaries, Republicans, Sarah Palin, Todd Palin, Trig Palin
  • Tworld News: Week of January 24, 2011

    To tweet or not to tweet, a question (un)fortunately never asked. Here's this week's crude news report:

    More like YoMommaCare! Am I right?! Wait, but seriously, who's going to pay for my mother's health care?

    Advice to Todd: Just tell Sarah that you've been sleeping with 'Tripp' — let her assume you mean your grandson, and then the affair with an adult woman will seem like no biggie.

    Read More »

    Tags: China, Google, Health Care, Joe Lieberman, Rush Limbaugh, Starbucks, Todd Palin, Tworld News
  • The Political Ramifications of Todd Palin Quitting the Iron Dog Race

    Yes, it's true, Todd Palin dropped out of the Iron Dog snowmobile race yesterday. Another case of the Random Palin Quits? Nope, for once a Palin had a perfectly legit reason for quitting: Todd's racing partner Scott Davis crashed on a bad trail, injuring his back (he'll be okay, thank goodness).

    See, this year's Iron Dog racers are up against some extra-tough conditions

    At one of the warmest Iron Dog starts in race history, drivers unzipped jacket vents and got ready for a spring-like day on the trail Sunday. "It's going to be a warm, wet ride," said Louis Miller III, patriarch of the father-son team from Anchorage.

    Iron Dog officials said an icy course is in store for racers. Snow cover is adequate but not ideal, said Iron Dog board president Marianne Beckham.

    Insufficient snow cover means patches of exposed dirt and ice, which makes racing treacherous even for experienced drivers like Palin and Davis

    Wet snow carved up by rain, heat and nearly 100 snowmachines left the trail deeply rutted and full of bumps. Davis and Palin started 22nd among the 29 teams on Sunday, putting them behind most of the pro class racers as well as the 28 trail class riders who started on Friday.

    "It was as bad as I've ever seen it," said Davis, who ran his first Iron Dog in 1984. "It's pretty torn up. A lot of machines went over it. It's going to be one of those survival years."

    Let me get this straight: unusually warm weather and a lack of snow helped create dangerous trail conditions that scratched Team Palin-Davis from the 2010 Iron Dog race. Is that about right?

    Your move, Inhofe family.

    Tags: Alaska, Climate Change, Todd Palin, Weather
  • Todd Palin Tackles Unemployment Like It's a Moose Gone Rogue

    todd-palin-tuxedoWhen the nation's jobless rate edges up near 10 percent, and winter's coming, and there's no relief in sight, and you are but a humble Ex-First Dude with an unemployed wife and a dozen children to feed, what do you do?

    Answer: Ask not what you can do for unemployment, but what unemployment can do for you

    Todd Palin won't be pulling a hard-core winter shift on Alaska's frozen North Slope, home to the richest oil fields in the country — at least not with energy giant BP.

    Company spokesman Steve Rinehart said Todd Palin submitted his resignation effective Sept. 18. Todd was a production operator on Alaska's North Slope. Production operators manage oil gathering centers, hubs where oil comes together from multiple wells.

    See that? See how the Palins have created well-paying jobs, two of them at least, in the state of Alaska?

    Tags: Alaska, Sarah Palin, Todd Palin, Unemployment