Once again, we're learning that not all states are created equal. We certainly know that presidential votes won't be counted equally this year. But the inequity continues into legislative races. Did you know that seventeen states don't even have Senate races this year? How unfair is that? Especially when certain states have TWO Senate races!
That's right, I'm looking at you, Mississippi! Seems that due to Senator Trent Lott's disgraceful mid-term retirement, there are two match-ups in the state:
* Incumbent Republican Sen. Thad Cochran vs. Democratic State Rep. Erik Fleming. With a name like Thad Cochran, you can't lose in Mississippi.
* Recently appointed incumbent Republican Roger Wicker vs. former Governor Ronnie Musgrove. This one will be much closer and could be the deciding factor in whether or not the Democrats reach 60 votes in the Senate tonight. Watch for the returns from De Soto County, now proudly under a state of emergency in anticipation of election-inspired race riots.
By the way, today is also Two-Fer Tuesday in Wyoming, where both Senate seats are up this year. That means that all four Wyoming residents are currently Senate candidates.
Tags: Election Day, Mississippi, Senate, Thad Cochran, Trent Lott, Wyoming
Unable to land any significant punches against Barack Obama, the Republican Party has switched its focus to re-enacting their much more successful 2004 presidential campaign… And what could be more 2004 than taking shots at Howard Dean?
The GOP is chiding Dean for referring to them as "the white party" in an NPR interview last week, after which he stopped himself and laughed at his gaffe…
"Our party has been a no-majority party for a long time. The fact is that the Democratic Party is made up of lots of different people," Dean said. "If you look at folks of color, even women, they're more successful in the Democratic Party than they are in the white — excuse me — in the Republican Party." Dean laughed as he stumbled over the correction.
Unfortunately for the GOP, their time-honored tradition of upbraiding Howard Dean (now four years and running) is eclipsed by an even longer tradition of sending no black Republicans to Congress, which now stands at 5 years, 229 days.
That said, Howard Dean is an obvious racist who refuses to acknowledge the "big tent" that Rush Limbaugh, Trent Lott and George Allen are pitching on the Twin Cities' front lawn next month.
Tags: Barack Obama, George Allen, Howard Dean, Rush Limbaugh, Trent Lott
It is the great honor of the entire Indecision 2008 staff — both living and deceased — to introduce you to a brand new writer that we'll be adding to the staff, a cub blogger who'll be chasing down the stories that we don't feel like covering: Cubby Chaser. That's not his actual name, obviously. It's just what we've been calling him. Since we decided in a staff meeting that we needed a cub blogger to chase stuff we don't like. We would have called anyone who took the position that. It's like a nickname. But less familiar. I assume he has a real name. He must have one, right? You get those at birth. Anyway, he's Cubby Chaser to us. He didn't respond to it very well at first, but he did eventually catch on.
So, let's see what he's got for us today and whether or not he'll be getting paid this Friday…
Hi. Cubby Chaser here. This is my first ever post on Indecision 2008, and I'm a little nervous. So, I thought it best to start out my time here by telling what I don't plan to do on the blog. And that's sensationalize. My senior-year journalism professor really stressed that sensationalism in news is destroying it at its foundation, and I don't plan on contributing to that folly.
For example, a lot of people are spending a lot of time blogging about how Republican Senator Trent Lott is having a lot of gay sex with his gay homosexual gay-prostitute lover. All because he suspiciously quit the Senate yesterday, giving no explanation about why he was leaving and whether or not it was so that he, Trent Lott, could spend more time homosexually rubbing hot oil into the bronzed gay muscles of his queer gay lover.
But these accusations are tenuous at best and deliciously scurrilous at worst. As of this moment — before we're presented with some towering rock hard facts or, better yet, photographs of Trent Lott decked out in leather gear being bent over a stairway railing by a bearish man in a chimney sweeper's hat, a look of ecstatic joy shared across two sweaty faces — any online chatter that Trent Lott is totally gay is nothing more than a vicious rumor. Besides, Trent Lott himself has said that homosexuality is a sin. So, why would he submerge himself in such a seductively sinful pit? It doesn't add up.
Actually, it turns out that it's all completely true.
See that? That last sentence is what I'd write if there were sufficient evidence to back up this claim. Unfortunately I can't allow this blog to contribute to the thousands upon thousands of Google hits, linking Trent Lott's name with ideas that Trent Lott is a very gay man. It's not responsible.
Here's a short list of some other things that I will never write on this blog, because they're just not true (so far as we know)…
- Trent Lott married and divorced a goat.
- Trent Lott enjoys having sex on a bed of whitefish salad and Sears catalogues.
- Trent Lott is all about erotic enemas.
- Trent Lott lives by the words of Thomas Jefferson, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.
- Trent Lott was the cameraman for 2girls1cup.
So, you will never see anything like that printed here by me, because there is absolutely no reason to believe any of that is true. I look forward to serving you.
Tags: Trent Lott
Success… Fame… Passion… Glory… Fortune… Heartbreak….
Take a trip back to those halcyon days before cruel fate ripped Lott, Craig, Jeffords and Ashcroft apart, and enjoy the four brothers-in-arms ululating like merry banshees in some kind of discount motel furnishings outlet…
Tags: Larry Craig, The Daily Show, Trent Lott
- Trent Lott to follow in Strom Thurmond's footsteps, fades into memory.
- Moving picture advertisement boasts elderly man's youthful frivolity.
- Obama plays Jamie Lee Curtis to Hillary's Lindsay Lohan.
- Does Huckabee bear the mark of the liberal beast?
- Ron Paul says he will raise almost as much as a real candidate.
Tags: Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Roll Call, Ron Paul, Trent Lott