Tweet Untweet: Putting Out Conservative Fires

Paul Ryan's new budget unveiled the same day as the papal conclave. Looks like House Republicans and the Vatican will both be blowing smoke.

— Adam Carl (@AdamWearsPants) March 12, 2013

Tags: Catholic Church, Paul Ryan, Republicans, Tweet Untweet, Twitter, Vatican

Wednesday's Links: Join Matt Damon's Toilet Strike

* Matt Damon wants to know how you celebrated World Toilet Day.

* If you build it, Pope John Paul II will come.

* How drunk did President Obama get you last night?

* Conan O'Brien and Andy Richter take on Team Nerdist.

* If you've ever been called a sea slug in bed, it wasn't an insult.

* Comedy Central's new show Nathan for You is for you. No… just you.

* Joe Biden and Bradley Cooper raise awareness for incredibly white teeth.

* This wasn't an isolated incident. Marco Rubio has had other encounters with water.

Tags: Barack Obama, Comedy Central, Conan O'Brien, Daily Links, Joe Biden, John McCain, Marco Rubio, Matt Damon, Pope John Paul II, Sports, State of the Union, Vatican

Pope Benedict Won't Monday-Morning-Pope His Successor

Unlike all the other dudes with Twitter accounts who claim to be authorities on everything, Pope Benedict has some theological justification for his claim on infallibility. Which means Benedict's nearly unprecedented abdication created the possibility of a retired pope second-guessing his successor — "His teachings are sententia fidei proxima, at best!"

Alas, a Vatican production of Two Popes, One Funny Hat is not going to happen:

"These powers go with the office, so they will pass to the next pope… Whoever renounces no longer has the assistance of the Holy Spirit to guide the Universal Church," Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi said at a briefing.

Guess it's impossible to disagree with an infallible pope who proclaims himself fallible.

Previously
#askpontifex Questions, Answered

Photo by Carsten Koall/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Tags: Catholic Church, Pope Benedict XVI, Religion, Vatican

Pope Benedict Gives Up Papacy for Lent

Pope Benedict XVI has a message for the faithful this Lenten season: you are not going to out-Catholic the Pope. You abstain from soda, he'll give up ice cream. You give up Facebook, he'll stop tweeting as @pontifex. You stop eating meat, he'll stop being the Pope.

Read More »

Tags: Catholic Church, Pope Benedict XVI, Religion, Vatican

Colbert: Glenn Beck Thinks He's MLK Because of God

A lot of people are upset that Glenn Beck is holding a rally on the same date and in the same place as Martin Luther King Jr's "I Have a Dream" speech, but Glenn says he didn't even know it was the same day, so it must have been God's work. It's just like when I planned that NAMBLA party at the orphanage–excuse me, when God planned that NAMBLA party at the orphanage. Here's what Stephen Colbert had to say about it last night:

More on Glenn Beck's divine providence below.

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

Read More »

Tags: Glenn Beck, Martin Luther King, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Vatican, Video