In the United States, it takes a village to raise a child off the couch. That's why Michelle Obama started the Healthy Lunchtime Challenge, which challenged kids to redistribute healthy ingredients into socialist recipes that undermine the freedom of fast food establishments all over this great land o' plenty.
The winners of the challenge were then honored by being invited to the White House for a lunch of cabbage, zucchini and kale. As if that wasn't enough to make them lifelong Republicans, they then received a surprise appearance and admonishment from President Obama…
The president told the group not to spill anything on the floor.
"I only have one request for you, and that is try not to drop any scraps on the floor, because Bo is on a diet right now, and he will eat anything that he sees, especially some of the tasty meals that you guys have prepared," Obama said.
A dog that would eat kale chips? Not in my America. So how did the kids like their health food with a side of "Don't mess up my carpet"? When asked what his favorite thing to eat was, winner Michael Lakind of Texas quickly responded, "steak."
Oh, well. You can't blame the Obamas for trying.
Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Barack Obama, Bo Obama, Michelle Obama, Republicans, White House
Speaking in front of the Women's Political Committee, Nancy Pelosi — House Minority Leader and Bizarro Michele Bachmann — claimed she saw the spirits of Suffragette icons in the White House materialize before her and heard them say, "At last we have a seat at the table."
Susan B. Anthony must be rolling over in her plain, matronly, yet sensibly and sturdily built coffin. Here's video of the incident…
Oh my God. That must have been terrifying… for the ghosts! BOOM!
What do White House ghosts do to scare each other at night? Tell Nancy Pelosi stories! BAZZZIIIIING! SOCK IT TO ME!
Democrats can spend all day laughing at the crazies in the Republican party (and they should, because it's fun), but they have to recognize the crazy in their own party. The only thing that separates Herman Cain from Harry Reid is that Herman Cain has charm and Harry Reid has power.
Tags: Harry Reid, Herman Cain, Michele Bachmann, Nancy Pelosi, Video, White House
Pop quiz time for White House Press Secretary Jay Carney!
Reporter: What city does this Administration consider to be the capital of Israel? Jerusalem or Tel Aviv?
Jay Carney: Um… I haven't had that question in a while. Our position has not changed. Can we, uh…
Reporter: What is the capital [of Israel]?
Jay Carney: You know our position.
Reporter: I don't.
World Net Daily's Lester Kinsolving: No, no. She doesn't know, that's why she asked.
Carney: She does know.
Reporter: I don't.
Kinsolving: She does not know. She just said that she does not know. I don't know.
For chrissake, does nobody have a cell phone on them anymore?! Come on, guys. Get your shit together. You're reporters. Do a little research. This is, like, a really easy question to solve. What did they teach you in journalism school? You just type "capital of Israel" into Google and…
Tags: Israel, Jay Carney, White House, WorldNetDaily
* Mitt Romney is a hero in this guy's mind. What else do you need?
* Romney's VP writing assignment.
* What kind of American do you speak?
* Finally, a onesie for Republican babies.
* This is what happens when Marines need to blow off steam.
* How Mitt Romney intends to pimp the White House, from College Humor.
* Baracksdubs has once again turned the President's speeches into pop art.
Tags: Daily Links, Guns, Military, Mitt Romney, Republicans, The Onion, White House