Tworld News: Week of March 23, 2011

140 characters: Just the right amount to consume the news, way too many for your performers to effectively portray in a two-man avant-garde staged version of the Libyan uprisings.

Speaking of complicated yet mildly funny Libya-related activities…

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Tags: Ann Coulter, Haiti, House of Representatives, Japan, Libya, Military, New York Times, NPR, Nuclear, Science & Technology, Twitter, Tworld News, Wyclef Jean

Non-President of Haiti Wyclef Jean to Release Album About Not Being President of Haiti

If you're like me, then, for about two weeks, you were intensely interested in Wyclef Jean's attempt to take the obvious next step in his music and badly-managed charity concert-promoting career by being elected president of Haiti, and then you kind of started to lose interest because Port-au-Prince is quite a ways away from your apartment in Chicago. And then you totally forgot about it altogether.

But then, just yesterday, a song from Jean's 1997 album The Carnival (you think it was "To All the Girls," but, ya know, it might have been "Bubblegoose") happened to pop up on your iPod while you were washing dishes and you suddenly thought to yourself, Oh shit! What the hell ever happened with that nonsense? and you went online and found out that Jean was barred from running for president of Haiti due to his candidacy "did not meet several legal requirements." (Is there a law against being a ridiculous joke candidate with no genuine qualifications who's hoping to use celebrity status to gain political power? We should get one of those laws. That sounds useful.)

And then you further found out that Wyclef Jean was so sad about not being president of Haiti that he channeled all his emo into an album about the experience…

Wyclef Jean is set to release a six-track EP, If I Were President: My Haitian Experience, which draws on his time attempting to run for office in the country still trying to recover from January's earthquake… In a statement, the rapper talks of his hope that lead track 'Election Time' will inspire citizens everywhere to take an interest in politics.

Unfortunately, his new album will almost certainly be barred from relevancy due to Jean's not meeting several requirements of being an interesting-enough musician this past decade or so.

Tags: Haiti, Music, Wyclef Jean

Wyclef Jean's New Video Is Not His Best Work

Two Alaska-themed posts in a row is too many Alaska-themed posts to be in a row. What we need is something to even things out. What's the opposite of Alaska? How about Haiti? Works for me.

So, here's a Wyclef Jean's first campaign video. I guess this thing is actually happening…

Personally, I prefer his "We Trying to Stay Alive" video to this "We Trying to Govern This Structurally and Economically-Devastated Nation" video. It makes me a lot more concerned for the well being of a couple of Refugees All-Stars rubba dubbin' in the club than for an entire country full of people trying to eat food and not die.

Plus, it also had a lot more break dancing.

(via Gotcha Media)

Tags: Haiti, Music, Wyclef Jean

Quote Unquote: Spicoli v. Fugee

Sean Penn — co-founder of the J/P Haitian Relief Organization — responds to Wyclef Jean's announcement that he's "being drafted by the youth of Haiti" to be their nation's president…

"I'm not accusing Wyclef Jean of being an opportunist; I don't know the man… One of the reasons I don't know very much about Wyclef Jean is that I haven't seen or heard anything of him in these last six months that I've been in Haiti."

I wonder what part of the country Wyclef will choose for his presidential mansion. I'm guessing Florida.

Video after the jump.

(via Reddit)

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Tags: Haiti, Natural Disasters, Quote Unquote, Sean Penn, Wyclef Jean

Wyclef Jean Officially Announces He's Being Kidnapped by Haitian Youths and Forced to Serve as President

Won't somebody please save Wyclef Jean?! Can we send in the Marines to protect this political prisoner? He clearly has no desire to run for President of Haiti, but he's "being drafted" by "the youth" of the country, which — as he tells Wolf Blitzer seventeen times — is more than 50 percent of the population somehow…

"I don't even say I'm trying to be President. I'm being drafted by the youth of Haiti."

Man, that is a tough culture they have down there. You'd think that a high-profile adult American citizen living in his million dollar home in New Jersey would be safe from a kids on an impoverished Caribbean island. Do you think maybe they're summoning him with The Voodoo?

Oh, and I think I found the perfect campaign poster for soon-to-kidnapped-President Wyclef's presidential run. Sums up my feelings exactly.

Tags: CNN, Haiti, Music, Wolf Blitzer, Wyclef Jean