Nine eleven nine eleven, nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven. Nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven! Nine eleven nine eleven nine?

Eleven…

Former Mayor Rudolph W. Giuliani has decided not to run for governor of New York next year after months of mulling a candidacy, according to people who have been told of the decision.

Nine eleven nine eleven?

It was not clear what prompted the decision, but the prospect of potentially facing Attorney General Andrew M. Cuomo, who is quietly planning his own run for governor on the Democratic ticket, may not have appealed to Mr. Giuliani, who suffered a bruising defeat in the 2008 Republican presidential primary. While many political analysts believe Mr. Giuliani would have comfortably beaten Gov. David A. Paterson, he would likely have faced an uphill battle against Mr. Cuomo, one of the most popular politicians in the state.

Nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven. Nine eleven nine eleven nine: eleven nine eleven; nine eleven nine eleven; nine eleven nine; eleven nine.

Eleven nine eleven.

Update: Nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven. Nine eleven?!?!

Former Mayor Rudy Giuliani has decided not to run for governor next year – but will run for U.S. Senate instead, sources told the Daily News.

If elected, the source said, he could use that as a stepping stone to run for President in 2012 — rather than run for re-election to the Senate.

Nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven nine eleven.

John Ziegler — the right-wing documentarian guy who made How Obama Got Elected and Media Malpractice — has read Sarah Palin's new book and [SPOILER ALERT] he loved it!

I was simply blown away by Going Rogue on almost every level. For many reasons, this is by far the best book and greatest literary achievement by a political figure in my lifetime.

What's the opposite of the opposite of hyperbole? Oh, yeah. Awesomeness!

Among other things, we discover that Sarah Palin has a ridiculously good memory…

As impressive as the details of the storytelling are, the real strength of Going Rogue is its brutal honesty…

Going Rogue is actually several books in one. It is a compelling biography, a gripping campaign tell-all, an expose on the sad state of our news media, a substantive outline of a political philosophy and even a comprehensive refutation of juicy tabloid rumors…

I believe that if this book is the success that it could and should be, there will be a groundswell among the Republican base demanding that she run. I strongly believe that if every Republican primary voter reads this book, Sarah Palin will win the 2012 nomination in a landslide, whether she wants it or not.

Sarah Palin/Sarah Palin's Book '12!

Perky media types like to pretend that Sarah Palin only appeals to a narrow base of old, far-right Republicans, but that's the camera adding ten pounds of deception. Face facts: Sarah Palin appeals to real Americans, especially women, independents and younger voters, people who get her free-thinkin', maverick-bein' message (in bookstores today).

Palin may have dodged the 2012 question during yesterday's Oprah interview, but with all that grassroots support growin' across Real America, she can't dodge for long. Check out this new ABC/Post poll…

Fifty-three percent [of voters] say they definitely would not vote for Palin if she were to run for president in 2012; that compares with 9 percent who say they'd definitely support her, while the rest, 37 percent, would consider it.

Palin moreover fails a basic hurdle on the road to the White House, were she to choose to take it: Just 38 percent of Americans see her as qualified to serve as president; 60 percent think she's not qualified for the job.

Well, I don't know when "being qualified for the job" became such a qualification for leading this country. Weren't the Founding Fathers just a bunch of farmers and shoeshine boys?

Seventy-six percent of Republicans view her favorably, but that dives to 45 percent of independents and just 21 percent of Democrats. Palin's rated favorably by more men, 48 percent, than women, 39 percent; one reason is that women are more apt to be Democrats. She’s also notably less popular with young adults – just 37 percent of those under age 30 see her favorably, compared with 49 percent of seniors.

Aha! Do you see what's happening here? Do you understand, with your mind? Sarah Palin's millions — if not billions — of supporters are lying low for now. They're keeping quiet. They're not telling the pollsters the truth because the pollsters can't handle the truth. They're waiting to reveal themselves at a more opportune time, perhaps the release date of Going Rogue II: The Wrath of Trig.

Trust me. It's all going according to plan.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! Ha!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha…

Friends and associates are encouraging Fox News chief Roger Ailes to jump into the political arena for real by running for president in 2012, top sources tell POLITICO.

"Ailes knows how to frame an issue better than anybody, and that's what we need now," says one Ailes friend who is encouraging the Fox founder, chairman and CEO to seek the Republican nomination to run against President Barack Obama…

Frank Luntz, the well-known Republican pollster, said Ailes could be a force if he makes the run. "I have known Roger Ailes for 29 years," says Luntz. "No one knows how to win better than Roger."

Really, "friends and associates"? That's your big idea? Just get the boss to go be president. He'll make things all better everywhere and restore America's fortunes to how they were in its glory days never ago. Why, just look at the bang-up job he's done at changing reality over at Fox!

What do you even say about a thing like that? It's absurdly delusional to the point of (almost) being parody. But it really shows you how frightened and confounded and bereft of ideas the right wing mind is these days.

You just keep thinking, Republican Party. That's what you're good at.

Considering yesterday and today's not-at-all-absurd news cycle — not to mention the GOP's continuing quest for flashy candidates that will appeal to the mythical young and hip conservative movement (sorry Ms. Palin, but you're yesterday's news) — I think we might have a brand new front-running team for 2012…

The only real hurdle I see so far is Balloon Boy's propensity for vomiting in the face of tough questions. Still, he handles the pressure with more grace than Sarah Palin.

And, for what it's worth, I hear that Meghan McCain's boobs have a much better grasp of economics than their owner's father.

If you don't check Mitt Romney's "Free and Strong America" website on the regular, I can only assume it's because you're the kind of jerk who prefers an Enslaved and Wimpy America. But just in case you missed it, here's Mitt's hot new video about cap-and-trade legislation (no embed code, uncool, man).

See, according to Mitt, a cap-and-trade system "could cost the average American family $1,761 a year, the equivalent of a 15% income tax hike." Fine, except a) that's not true and b) if you are Mitt Romney, $1,761 is more like the equivalent of a 0.0000015% income tax hike.

Anyway, enjoy watching your 2012 GOP frontrunner as he talks about math and tries to remember to blink in a human-like fashion, and when you're done, how about making a "generous contribution"? Any amount welcome, from $25 to $1,000 to $5,000, maybe with an emphasis on the higher end there.

Just remember: a $5,000 donation to Mitt Romney is the equivalent of a 42.58% income tax hike.