It's like one of those magic pictures. You just have to un-focus your eyes just right…

Put the glasses on! Put the glasses on! Fnord!*

See also…

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^{* If you don't get these references, well then maybe you should have spent less time during your teenage years drinking, having sex and forming actual relationships with other humans, and spent more time watching every John Carpenter movie ever made and reading 800-page works of conspiracy fiction written by Robert Anton Wilson.}

This moment in teabag-mentality is brought to you by Brawndo. Brawndo! It's got the critical thinking skills plants crave!

Protesters who attended Saturday's Tea Party rally in Washington found a new reason to be upset: Apparently they are unhappy with the level of service provided by the subway system.

Rep. Kevin Brady asked for an explanation of why the government-run subway system didn't, in his view, adequately prepare for this past weekend's rally to protest government spending and government services.

Seriously.

The Texas Republican on Wednesday released a letter he sent to Washington's Metro system complaining that the taxpayer-funded subway system was unable to properly transport protesters to the rally to protest government spending and expansion.

We now return you to your regularly depressing outlook on society.

(via Balloon Juice)

Best new YouTube genre: DIY documentaries of people going way out of their way to prove how utterly moronic, scarily racist, pathetically silly, willfully ignorant and generally horrible they are…

Wow! Just, wow! It's like a snow white sea of stupidity and ugliness. It almost makes you want to wade in, hop up on a burning cross and surf a swell of xenophobia all the way back to the 1950s, huh?

Watch How to Talk Like a Real American Genius, Part 1: The Phantom Menace.

(via The Public Record)

* A useful guide for translating from Teabagger into English.

* So, it turns out there really were 2 million people at the 9/12 march. Give or take 1,930,000.

* Yo, Kanye. I'm really happy for you and I'ma let you finish, but TMZ has one of the best audio recordings of Barack Obama calling you a "jackass" of all time.

* Rep. Pete Stark (D-Calif.) to health care protester: "I wouldn't dignify you by peeing on your leg, it wouldn't be worth wasting the urine."

I am continually in awe of the glory that is America…

(via Andrew Sullivan)

Where were you on 9/12/09? Were you at home, sucking the teat of Big Government? Or were you out in the streets of Washington, DC with the Tea Party Patriots, patrioting it up for the patriotical cause of hating the president as much as is patriotly possible?

The 9/12 event was, of course, a huge success — see photo, above — but some non-patriotic unpatriots in the liberal media have insisted on "playing the race card" by calling the tea party patriots racists, which is not what the Founding Fathers* would have done, and finally the White House decided to weigh in on the matter…

"I don't think the president believes that people are upset because of the color of his skin," White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said Sunday on CNN’s State of the Union.

Of course not. As everybody knows, these people are upset because Glenn Beck told them to be upset.

Next question?

^{*The Founding Fathers, in contrast, "played the race card" by keeping slaves.}