TMZ spoke with Congressman Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah) who tells us he thinks Prejean could be a serious contender in the political arena:

"[Carrie] has the ability to draw crowds and if she has a strong message to go with that, who knows what she can do? She has star power which can open doors."

That's some high regard you hold your job in Rep. Chaffetz.

In all seriousness, though, could she possibly be any worse than Michele Bachmann?

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But, did you know that she is also an asshole?

Carrie Prejean has been a hot topic this week after it was revealed that she made multiple sex tapes for her ex-boyfriend. Now we are hearing from the ex-boyfriend and the plot thickens. He says she was 20-years-old when she recorded the sexually graphic cellphone videos and sent them to him for his reaction…

After the sex tape scandal broke, it didn't take Prejean long to call the ex-boyfriend. He said that she was furious and asked him to lie and say that she was 17-years-old at the time they were created.

Ugh! What is wrong with this stopwatch? It's been stuck at 14 minutes for too long now. Get to 15! Get to 15 already!

All she has to do now is secure the Republican nomination, and here's where the story gets symbolic…

Fiorina, considered to be a moderate Republican with little history on social issues, will face off against conservative California Assemblyman Chuck DeVore for the GOP nomination.

The Fiorina-DeVore matchup has all the makings of another Republican battle between the conservative wing of the party and national leaders seeking for the most electable candidate. [...] A string of conservative bloggers have already lined up behind DeVore, and South Carolina Sen. Jim DeMint said Tuesday he was backing the assemblyman.

So which will it be, California Republicans? The ineffective lady whose printers never work or the DeMint-ed DeVore? Only time will tell, but either way, it'll have nothing to do with the shallowness of the GOP's leadership pool and everything to do with Barack Obama's first year in office.

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

Look closely…

That's right. The secret message is that he's not going to tolerate unecessary legislation when more urgent serious reform is greatly needed.

Thank you for playing.

This video comes from some smartypants called RescueMarriage.org who think their pants are so smart that they introduced the 2010 California Marriage Protection Act — which not-completely-genuinely aims to protect marriage from the evils of divorce — in response to last year's Proposition 8 — which genuinely genuinely genuinely aimed to protect marriage from the evils of marriage.

And it looks like they'll be assembling next month…

On November 14, 2009, thousands of Californians will be united in a common cause as we march on the state capitol building to demand a return to traditional values as part of our petition kick-off event.

Participate in democracy the American way, by shouting angrily, using inflammatory rhetoric and memorizing jingoistic slogans to chant or misspell on signs.

I'm curious to see what their protest march looks like. No way that those people will be funnier than these people.

These incidents were widely seen as gaffes, or "Bidens," but I'm starting to wonder if Carly Fiorina doesn't have some sort of secret blueprint for politics that only she can understand. For example, see the screenshot above? That is Carly Fiorina's new website, because — having done so well helping John McCain win the White House — our gal C.Fi is possibly maybe challenging Democrat Barbara Boxer for her California Senate seat.

Oh, it gets better…

"It's Day and Night," the bright red Web site reads. "It's Dogs and Cats. It's Good and Bad. It's Carly vs. Boxer."

"It's the most singularly awful political website I have ever seen, and I am including all the old, basic HTML websites that were the rage 10 years ago," conservative blogger John Hawkins of the site RightWingNews.com said in an e-mail to CNN.

Well yes, of course it's awful. Don't you see? As a businessperson, Carly Fiorina understands the importance of branding.

And this is the perfect representation of her brand: being incredibly bad at everything^TM.

* A useful guide for translating from Teabagger into English.

* So, it turns out there really were 2 million people at the 9/12 march. Give or take 1,930,000.

* Yo, Kanye. I'm really happy for you and I'ma let you finish, but TMZ has one of the best audio recordings of Barack Obama calling you a "jackass" of all time.

* Rep. Pete Stark (D-Calif.) to health care protester: "I wouldn't dignify you by peeing on your leg, it wouldn't be worth wasting the urine."

Thankfully, somebody's finally showing the guts to deliver, in one fell swoop, a blow against both Big Atheism and Big Homosexuality…

Former Miss California USA Carrie Prejean (pray-ZHAHN') has sued pageant officials for libel, slander and religious discrimination…

Prejean was fired in June by pageant officials, who cited missed scheduled appearances. Prejean's attorney says that's not true and his client was ousted because of controversial remarks in April during the Miss USA pageant that marriage should be between a man and a woman.

Who knows what actually happened in that mess. I honestly have no idea who is right and who is wrong. I do know that people should not be fired for having stupid, mean-spirited opinions about things, especially when those things have nothing to do with their jobs. And if her stupid, mean-spirited opinions really are the reason she got fired, she deserves to win that court case. Because this is America, and many people — including, I'm told, her grandfather — died so that people like Carrie Prejean would have the right to hold whatever stupid, mean-spirited opinion that like.

But, then again, she might just be doing it for the money/attention. That's just as likely, really.