The Center's "Broken Government" project, unveiled today, purports to catalog eight years of executive branch failures under George W. Bush. Want a taste? Grab your selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor and pull up a chair…

* 45 million Americans without health care

* 190,000 U.S.-supplied weapons missing in Iraq

* $100 billion in federal tax revenues lost annually to corporations using off-shore tax shelters

* 275 largest U.S. corporations pay, on average, about 17 percent in taxes in 2007, half the standard corporate tax rate

* $45 trillion in credit-default swaps, without federal oversight, in 2007

* 2,640 days Osama bin Laden at large since September 11, 2001 (as of December 10, 2008)

And, you know, this is just the kind of naysaying that certain NPR-listening, environment-enjoying, golden retriever-having types always do. Why couldn't we make a list of this administration's successes since 2000? For example:

* 2 funky dance routines

* 1 memorable reading of "The Pet Goat"

* 5 years since major combat operations in Iraq ended!

* 1,583 acres of brush cleared in Texas

See? That wasn't so hard. I could probably even think of a few more, if I weren't hiding under my desk, groping for the ulcer medication I can no longer afford.