The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

* Show your support for a true American hero in 2012! (Or else!) [via Tosh.0]

* Wanna be Barack Obama's Chicago neighbor? (But, be warned, the price is literally unimaginable.)

* GOP aims to overthrow White House czars in glorious House revolution (hopefully by October).

* Now you can watch the president call Kanye West a jackass! God bless us, everyone!

Former Vice President Dick Cheney…

A decision by the University of Wyoming to name a new center for international students for former Vice President Dick Cheney is drawing criticism from people who say Cheney's support for the Iraq war and harsh interrogation techniques should disqualify him from the distinction…

The center is funded in part with $3.2 million the Cheneys donated to the university in several installments while he was vice president…

"We feel that by naming it the Cheney International Center, that the programs and UW can't avoid being identified with that ideology and that approach to global politics that the Bush-Cheney administration championed," Pelican said Tuesday.

Awesome! The new Cheney Center for International Students should really fill out the quad nicely, right alongside the university's excellent Lohan Center for Feminist Studies and the Vick Center for Veterinary Medicine.

At any rate, it's gotta be more popular than the old Cheney Center for International Students (his basement).

Wall Street Journal columnist James Taranto opined on Monday that — if the 2012 election were to turn to national security — "it's hard to think* of a better candidate… than Richard B. Cheney."

Hahahahahahahaha! Ha ha ha! Hahahaha! Ha!

But while his headline — "Cheney for President" — provoked guffaws in some quarters, several of the party's most well-regarded strategists and pollsters are actually taking the idea deadly seriously.

Hoooooo! Hahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Haaaaaaa!!!

"The Republican Party needs to move forward and build on its past, not return to it," Alex Castellanos, a frequent CNN analyst and GOP messaging guru, told the Huffington Post via email. "But if the agenda turns to security, Obama is mired in a no-win mess in Afghanistan, and the Obama administration hasn't created a single job in four years after indebting the nation for generations, maybe Dick Cheney could run on a theme of 'Change'."

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwww!

Shit. I just got sad juice all over my laughing pants.

.

_{* I'll bet the phrase "hard to think" comes up often in James Taranto's conversations.}

If you're not completely clear on the absolute obvious obviousness of his argument, take a trip down memory hole lane and relive the laughs and the tears with Jon and Stephen…

February 5, 2009: Why Are You Such a Dick?

More after the jump.

The Daily Show and Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday starting at 11pm / 10c.

April 2, 2009: Cheney's Secret Assassination Squad

April 22, 2009: Torture Memo – Balzheimers Disease/Bizarro Washington

May 5, 2009: The Word – Captain Kangaroo Court

May 11, 2009: Excuse Me Your Dick Is Out

May 21, 2009: American Idealogues

July 21, 2009: The Word – A Perfect World

June 25, 2009: Cheney Predacted

Yes, according to a guy who has absolutely no vested interest in the answer to that question…

Responding to criticism from former Vice President Cheney that President Obama is making the nation more vulnerable to terrorism, the president’s National Security Adviser, Gen. Jim Jones (Ret.), told ABC News in an exclusive interview that actually the reverse is true: President Obama's greater success with international relations has meant more terrorists put out of commission.

Yeah, but that's just because he's giving them jobs in the administration.

But, hey, ya know. Whatever works.

Anyway, the reason I even bring it up at all is to point out this bit from Jason Linkins' liveblog of the interview which brought a small glimmer of happiness into my otherwise dark and moribund existence…

Cheney seems to have a massive phlegmball lodged in his throat. JUST COUGH UP THE LAST SLIVER OF YOUR CONSCIENCE ALREADY, DICK! Let it go free! Let it wander the plains. Let it take us residence with the mighty buffalo, or the heroic eagle! Don't just keep choking it back, back, back down into the fetid pissoir you call your body cavity!

Yep.

"In the second term, [Dick Cheney] felt [President George W.] Bush was moving away from him," said a participant in the recent gathering, describing Cheney's reply.

"He said Bush was shackled by the public reaction and the criticism he took. Bush was more malleable to that. The implication was that Bush had gone soft on him, or rather Bush had hardened against Cheney's advice. He'd showed an independence that Cheney didn't see coming. It was clear that Cheney's doctrine was cast-iron strength at all times — never apologize, never explain — and Bush moved toward the conciliatory."

What?! Dick Cheney and George Bush did not see eye-to-eye on the correct way to piss on the Constitution?! That's so sad. Two angry, fearful men who just wanted to soak the founding principles of the nation in their foul-smelling urine, and they couldn't make it work together.

That's really sobering. I mean, those two guys are the very best at being terrible, and if they can't find common ground in country-ruining, then what chance does Barack Obama have in ruining the country? What chance do any of us have in ruining the country?

I guess when I have kids, I won't be able to tell them that when they grow up they can achieve any goal they set their minds to.

Coverage continues after the jump.

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.